The Second Time

"Xin Ran, you were reborn for a reason." The goddess' voice was soft and emotional as if her death had brought the goddess some pain.

With pain emitting all over her body, she relived a memory she thought she had forgotten. Images of a battlefield appeared in her mind. She saw her own corpse, and a man loomed over her. His eyes were crestfallen and dark, the aura of death. 

Something in her told her the name of this man was Fang Yiqi. The name brought even more pain to her heart. The more she thought of this name, the more she felt a sensation akin to a knife cutting deep into her chest. However, she could not remember anything about this man either.

She must have loved him. But why did this love seem so painful to her? 

Had Fang Yiqi done something in her past life to hurt her deeply, that her heart no longer wanted any connection to him? In her past life, her name had been Chu Xin Ran. She had chosen to drink Granny Meng's soup, so she no longer would have any connection to Fang Yiqi, although some of her memories still remained. She still recalled her name and Fang Yiqi's.

After she woke up hours later upon drinking the granny's soup, Granny Meng told her that Goddess Qiwan had sent her to the mortal world to perform a task. Granny Meng appeared to be afraid of Goddess Qiwan as well and deemed her a goddess of high respect. Though this name was highly familiar, neither could she remember who the goddess was.

The granny said in time, she might remember, even if she had drunk the soup. Because Goddess Qiwan was the one in control of her memories, even the soup had much lesser of an effect on her memories. But while she was unconscious, she had heard the voice of the goddess, and just by communicating to her through her 'dreams', the goddess had made her recall an uncomfortable memory. 

What did the goddess aim to achieve by making her remember her death? Everything suddenly felt so confusing.

She suddenly felt an urge to speak to the goddess, and so she focused her mind and imagined the body of a goddess. Having no idea of how the goddess appeared to be, she just visualised Qiwan as how she wanted Qiwan to look like: herself.

"Goddess, why did you send me to the mortal world if you intend for me to forget everything?"

Granny Meng instantly turned towards her.

Surprisingly, Granny Meng's words were "you were born for a reason, and now, you will be reincarnated without the need for my soup. Go along, and embrace your new life and journey."

If she didn't drink the granny's soup, what did she drink earlier, then?

A voice spoke inside her, just as it did earlier.

"You will remember when you need to, Xin Ran."

She recalled all the memories of herself being Chu Xin Ran, and the pain of her failed attempt at love. One question remained: how would she live life all over again, as a new person? Could she ever find the strength to live, and love again?

Xin Ran realised she had died on the battlefield because she had loved Fang Yiqi and Yiqi didn't reciprocate her love.

After she had died, he had said only one word, why.

She answered firmly, "Because I love you, that's why."

Her life had promptly ended at that point, but the pain had lingered even after her death.

Then she heard the goddess' voice again.

"You're on your own now. I bestow upon you blessings for your rebirth, but I can only wish you the best of luck as you embark on your own journey. Goodbye, Xin Ran."

And everything else just faded to black as this time, all her memories except for her name, were wiped from her mind.