The source of Elsabet’s recent mood changes would soon be made clear to Sebastion.
It began this morning. Peaceful as it was. It started with him watching Elsabet warily from across the table at luncheon. Grimacing at the sounds she was making as she quenched her ravaging hunger.
She sounded as though she was starving to death.
He wondered how much she’d been eating while he was gone. Does she not eat while I’m away.
That had unlocked a whole passel of new fears.
He sat across the width of the table from her, and twice already had been splashed with mashed potatoes launched off her trencher as she forced the food into her mouth in handfuls. She rummaged through the platter of chicken. Plucking at the browned skin of the legs until finding the pinkest one, which she tilted her head up to devour nearly whole.
He cringed again. “Hungry sweetheart?”
She paused, blue eyes lifting to look at him.
So beautiful it
Sebastian was happy to be home, he realized that evening. As he lay next to Elsabet in his bed.Happier to be in her arms.Her slim frame was tucked against his side. Cheek resting on his chest.He stroked her long silver blonde hair. Watching the shining strands course through his fingers, thoughtfully.“What are you thinking?” She murmured against his chest. Warming the skin she breathed against.“I’m thinking of your warm belly on my hip.”Partially. And the warm mound of it. Wondering how to discuss it without scaring you away.“And?”“Do you wish me to simply blurt what I know not how to say?” He queried softly. Knowing if he tried it would come out in a way that only made her angrier.“Will it hurt me?” He felt her body tense in fear.No. It’ll make you want to fight.And I’m very much enjoying this moment. He frowned. He wasn’t ready for it to end. Not just yet
“Elsabet?” He murmured during dinner later in the day. Hoping to prompt some conversation from her.She’d been painfully quiet since yesterday.Please talk to me. He willed her. Missing her zest for the meal from yesterday.She looked up from her trencher of food.He’d been joining her at one corner of the long table. But tonight, he sensed he was unwelcome since he’d told her he wouldn’t release her. She hadn’t said a word to him in months and it was making him ache inside.How much longer will this go on?She no longer crept into his room to warm his lonely nights.He spent them instead listening to her up in her chamber, from his chamber in the servant’s quarters. Soothed by the sounds of her slumber but torn asunder, nonetheless.What’ve I done?The absence of her affections was agonizing. And he wondered constantly about the impending introduction to his child.Will I get to meet her?
“A girl?” Elsabet said softly. Echoing it as if in disbelief.“Yes.”He could feel her, her energy tightening. A swirl of fear and heart ache and so many emotions. As always, Elsabet was contained emotion. Boiling with it.“What will you name her?” He whispered. He wanted to ask her let him help pick one. He yearned to sit with her in their chambers discussing it. Watching the orange glow of a waning fire with her body warming his.When I can never feel heat any other time.The curve of her stomach and slight rounding of her hips was apparent to him now. He wanted to trace them and learn her new shape in the ways that only a lover could.“Please…Elsabet please talk with me.” He knew bone deep, that she was going to leave without a word more. But when she did it still felt like he was a rock sinking alone to the bottom of a pond.Once she’d gone, he collapsed limply back into the chair. Dropping his face to his hands. Sh
Elsabet awoke this morning to unmistakable brightness pouring through the window slit. She had managed to get back to sleep after a fitful night but still found herself exhausted.The more her young one grew, the more Elsabet’s old fears emerged. She worried about bringing a babe into the same world that had gravely disappointed her.Elsabet grew increasingly strained by the discomfort. She found that pacing helped soothe her. This morning she yearned for Quandary’s company. She’d have liked to curl up to the big cat and let his warmth soothe her tummy.After hours of pacing and rubbing her bulging stomach downward she gave a screech of frustration.To her surprise, Calisto instantly appeared. Looking aggravated.“Cease that noise Elsabet! Why? Why do you do that?” She pressed her palms to her ears.“I’m miserable!”“Why?” Calisto’s eyes roved the floor in confusion before settling on Elsabet as she cocked her head.“I’ve not s
Sebastian’s gaze lingered on her swollen belly.What will she do when the time gets close? Will she let me near the infant?“Do you?” She lifted a brow.Love you? You must know I do. He thought.“Do you?” He countered. Hoping she might answer for once.She lowered her head. Giving him a condemning look.He chuckled. “Fine, have it your way. Yes, Elsabet, I think you know I do.”Elengard stuck her head in. “You called?”“Could you set up lunch in here?”She glanced past him at Elsabet. Noting how pale and uncomfortable the woman looked. Her dress strained around her middle and she looked as though her back would bow over any minute. “Of course!”As soon as she left the room, he levelled turquoise eyes on Elsabet.“And what would you have me do with that information?” She hitched her chin.You know the answer to that.“You know that too. I’d have all of you,
Elsabet’s question was complicated.Has something happened to Quandary. The answer was no. But it was harder to admit to her that he was Quandary.I’ve waited too long to tell her. Or, perhaps he shouldn’t have deceived her to begin with.But had I not, I’d have missed so many chances to comfort her. “No, not persay.”She eyed him skeptically. Lurching forward to down her glass of water, body language hostile as she tried to gauge what he was about to say.Rising, he refilled her drink under her watchful gaze. Taking his seat again, he felt her eyes on him. Studying his movements.She was unholy beautiful.Angry or not.Firelight played with some gold tones in the white of her hair. Making her seem to glow.He itched to wind his fingers in its luxurious length.It’d be as soft as the rest of her.“You’re eying me as thoughI’m&
As promised, Sebastian was in Elsabet’s chamber in under an hour. Padding in on quiet paws. He went to Elsabet.She was sitting in a chair by the window, looking out over the meadow to the trees beyond.He sat before her, curling his long black tail around his paws as he peered at her through yellow eyes.“Hello, my friend.” She murmured. But she didn’t look at him. Which made him wonder, if she had understood what he said more than she’d indicated.Perhaps it was why she wanted to fight. Her own brand of denial. But with her, he was never sure about anything.“Do you wonder what I’m thinking?” She murmured. Stroking the top of his flat head. “Or, like him, do you peer into my mind.”I haven’t peered into your mind in a long time, my love. Or I might know what you want of me. He thought morosely.“Is he right?” She murmured. “Do you only come to spy on me?”He huffed. Scooting closer t
Reaching down, Elsabet yanked the pendant loose from his hands.Sebastian's torn shoulders and arms offered little resistance.It was as the sun was cresting the ridge that she released her grip on him. Watching him fall.For just a moment, she wished she could take it back. He was courageous. Admirable in his fearlessness.A shame.Even in his shredded shirt with gold hair tousled, he'd been wildly handsome.She watched his strange expression as he looked up at her, dropping limply in a deadfall toward the trees far below.Totally calm...He was...peaceful.Bafflement marked her face. Making him fight the smile pulling at his lips.He gave her a chiding look. Angry at her choice.Or perhaps disappointed. Elsabet started to turn in flight, reluctant to see his human body crushed in the trees.Turning back from the body of water, she headed back toward LandingTown.As she turned something scintillating caught her eye. She glanced down and watched flashes of vibrant gold erupting from whe