No.8

POV Penelope.

Days without seeing him, days during which I try as best I can to approach him without any result, I wonder if he has already healed. I heard that he got hurt like that because they had saved a young baby that was kidnapped by the hunters, and I dared to call him a monster, no but what an idiot I am. 

No wonder he doesn't want to see me anymore. The store is full, as if people are more and more interested in books. I watch her without saying anything, for once she's really working, I'm not going to interfere. Sitting behind the counter, I take care of cashing the money and writing the receipts. 

"Hello Penelope. "

I look up to see who it is. It's the man from last time. Brad? Bill? I've completely forgotten what his name is. He smiles at me, bringing out his dimples. He's really very handsome. 

"Hello... Ben have you forgotten already? "

 I put on a sorry face. 

"Yes, I'm sorry. I've had so much to do lately. So how are you? "

"I'm fine thanks. " 

He paces the store with his eyes. 

"You look overworked. "

"Yes. I don't know whether to cry about it or be happy. It looks like they all passed the word around today. By the way, can I help you? "

"Yes. I'm here to pick up Liv."

"Liv? "I asked in surprise. 

I look behind him and see her watching us with a worried look, like a child who would have been in the act, it makes me smile. 

"Oh you mean you and Olivia..."

 He seems embarrassed to broach the subject with me. It's almost cute. 

"She'll be taking her break in fifteen minutes. I'll tell her where you are. "

 He smiles and tells me he'll be across the street in the coffee shop. I can't believe it, Olivia has a boyfriend. And I thought he was trying to seduce me, but I was sadly mistaken. He seems to be infatuated with her. Good for them. I'm happy for Olivia. A few minutes later she takes her break, she gives me a questioning look to know if she can go and join him. I smile at her to let her know that she can.

 At 4pm, I decide to close the store and leave, I really don't feel like working. I am quite tired, I go straight home to take a shower and rest. Once home, I take a bath, put on a loose t-shirt and pink shorts and sit in front of the TV with my hair up in a bun and a huge bowl of chocolate ice cream in front of me. I flick on the remote control, no interesting program on the TV. I end up turning it off.

 I go to the library to get a book, I've already read them all. I let out a sigh of frustration, such monotony at not even thirty years old, it's almost distressing. I sit back down on the couch and let my thoughts drift to him. What could he be doing right now? Is he thinking about me? I miss him, I miss even his dirty jokes, I need to see him, to feel him. I stay there questioning myself for more than two hours, then I crack.

 I take the keys to my car and head for the mountain. I park my car in front of Mich's hut, I notice right away that Annie's car is also parked there.

 I don't ask myself more questions, I know very well that she is in love with Mich, even if neither of them dares to admit it, and it is she who dares to talk to me about frankness. I turn to Calvin's cabin. The door is open. I push it gently and enter the house, whose door is open. No, but who leaves the door to their house open at this time of night? An alpha overpowered league!

The living room is deserted, but I hear noises in the kitchen. I walk towards the noises and I see Calvin shirtless with denim pants playing with a little girl. 

"I think we've put in enough sugar Sacha. " 

 

"But uncle, a little more. But just one spoonful, then we put it in the oven. "

"Okay, it's working. "

I don't know why, but this scene moves me, it could have been Mason and our child or Calvin and our child. The little girl is the first to notice my presence. 

"Uncle Cal, you have a visitor. "

 Calvin turns to me and his smile immediately disappears, he looks at me and squints his eyes as if he is having a hallucination. 

"Would you excuse me for a moment my dear? " 

"Okay. Will the lady stay and eat the cookies with us? " 

"I don't know honey! She doesn't think I'm good enough for her. "

I bow my head in shame, he walks over to me with a neutral look. And leads me to the living room. 

"What are you doing here?" 

I detail his body. The last time I saw him, it was from a distance, he had a huge bandage all over his belly, he is much better, his wound has healed completely, there are not even any scars. But here I have a close-up view. His torso is drawn like the sculpture of a Greek God, he has powerful muscular arms all raised by chocolate bars. I pass my tongue over my lips, then I move towards him. 

I look him in the eyes and I put my hands on his chest. I am quite tall, but in front of him I have to force myself to raise my head, he is so tall. 

I continue to look into his eyes while moving my hands over his chest, feeling his heart beat so fast as I was scared to death for him. I close my eyes, put my hands on his face, hoist my feet up and bring my face closer to his, rubbing our noses together, finally breathing in his special smell.

"Has anyone ever told you that you smell like a forest? " 

He answers nothing and remains stoic. He is content to observe me. I open my eyes and dive into his gaze. 

"Don't close yourself to me, please. Let me talk to you. Just listen to me once. " 

 His phone suddenly starts to ring. I watch him walk away to get it. 

"Hello!" he shuts up to listen to what his caller is saying. "

"Okay! We just made the last batch, I'll get it ready and bring it back to you. " 

He hangs up the phone and heads for the kitchen. 

"Princess your mom called! It's time to come home. " 

"Already? " She asks with a pout. " I was having so much fun with you. "

"Me too, honey. But orders come from on high, you know how grumpy your mom can be when she's angry. " 

 The little girl starts to laugh. 

"Yes sometimes it sounds like smoke is coming out of her ears. " 

Calvin bursts out laughing. I smile too.

"Shh!" Calvin says with a laugh. "Do you want her to hear us or what?  We'll make a package for you to give to your mom. "

A few minutes later, they come out of the kitchen she gives me a cookie which I accept with a smile. 

"My name is Sasha. " 

"Penelope. "I say with a smile. 

"Uncle Cal is going to walk me home, do you want to come with us? " 

 I look at Calvin who so far hasn't given me a single glance. He pulls on a t-shirt. 

"Maybe another day. And then we can all bake cookies together. " 

"Okay, that will be great! Bye. " 

"Bye, Sasha. "

I watch them leave, once alone I look around. His hut looks pretty much like his, well if you can call it that. For me it's a whole house with living room, shower and everything that goes with it. I go to the living room where I sit and wait for him, I am so nervous that I turn my hands in all directions. A few minutes later, Calvin comes back, puts the keys on the dresser and walks towards me. He still doesn't react. 

He turns his back to me. He turns his back on me and walks to the kitchen, I stay in the living room. This situation weighs on me. Then I start to cry, because I am exhausted and I don't know what else. 

"You are right not to want to talk to me. If I were you I would have done the same. I'm an idiot okay? " I say getting up. 

I follow him into the kitchen and plant myself in front of him.

"Life has taken so much from me. I lost the man I was going to marry, he died in Afghanistan. I didn't even get to say goodbye to him because his body was unrecognizable," I yelled out. And if that wasn't enough, I also lost my baby. I almost lost myself but for Annie's presence in my life. "

He comes over and hugs me. 

"Never once since they died have I shed a tear, never really been able to accept that they are gone. I've never really grieved for them.  "

"Calm down Penelope. "

"No! If I keep quiet I will never have the courage to tell you what's in my heart. " 

 

I leave the safety of his arms, heading to the other side of the kitchen, I wipe my eyes. 

"I'm scared Calvin, I'm so scared of getting attached to someone and losing them again. And you confuse me. Since the first time I saw you by the lake. Do you remember? "

"No he said, rubbing his eyes. "

"Shortly after I arrived here, I went to get drunk in the forest and there I saw you. First in your wolf form, then you transformed. You felt my presence and..."

"So it was you that night?  "He cuts me off.

I shake my head to say yes. He smiles.

"I'm afraid that one day you'll leave me too. When I saw you hurt the last time Cal..."

 He walks over to me and comes back to hug me. 

"You're telling me that the reason you were so bitchy with me. Is it because you didn't want to show me that you like me? " He says, smiling arrogantly. 

I want to wipe that cheeky smile off his face. So I decide to do something that surprises both him and myself. I walk up to him, stand on my tiptoes and stroke his lips with my tongue. Once my lips touch his, I feel like electricity running through my body. I suck on his bottom lip before biting it gently, he grabs me by the hips and pulls me even more to him. He plunges his tongue into my mouth, his breathing becomes breathless. He lifts me up while continuing to kiss me and takes us to the couch. I feel like I'm living again.