I clutch my chest because I can feel the physical pain at realizing that my mate is in love with my younger sister.
Do the gods really hate me this much? Does Selene despise me so much that she would do this to me? Take the love of my mate and give it to my sister, a sister I haven't seen since I was ten and she was nine.
It has been ten years but I would recognize her eyes anyway. Eyes that I used to love me, eyes that adored me but now they are filled with nothing but pure loathing.
I try to breathe through the pain but it is of no use, the tears fall and I don’t even want to stop, what for? when I don’t have the power to. I stand before the man who has the capability to bring down to my knees and destroy and in his eyes I see nothing.
No regret and no shame at all for what he is doing to me, he simply does not care, he only wants her.
I wonder what will happen when Bianca’s mate comes along, will she reject him like Xavier did with me? Or will she leave Xavier for him.
But seeing how they are now I am double sure that she will reject her mate in favor of Xavier and god do I feel sorry for the poor soul. They have no idea the pain that is awaiting them.
Not being able to stand the sight of them in each other’s arms, I turn and leave not even seeing anything or anyone. It hurts and I have no idea how to turn it off, how to bury it so that I don’t have to feel it.
I don’t know how to numb it. Until that moment I had never seen his chosen and neither had the pack, so it was easy to pretend that she doesn’t exist, she doesn’t stand in the way of my happiness.
It was easy to think that Xavier does not love her as much but here she was, and it was no longer easy pretending that Xavier doesn’t love her because I could see it clearly in his eyes that he did and to make it even worse, it was my sister.
How was I supposed to live with that?
As I pass the living room I can hear the occupants mocking me, laughing at me and it pains me even more that they would find it funny that I am in pain.
Haven’t they ever heard the saying don’t kick a dog when it is already down? Someone intercepts me but I refuse to look up not wanting them to see my tears.
They forcefully grab my chin and force me to look up and it’s none other than Raya, my number one tormentor.
“What? The little freak can’t stand to see her mate in someone else’s arms? Does it hurt? Do you want me to kiss your boo boo and make it all go away?” She taunts me, making everyone else laugh.
“Please Raya, just let me go.. I am begging you” my voice comes out small, so full of pain that I can hear how pathetic I sound even to my own ears.
“This is what you deserve you pathetic bitch, I am so glad the alpha never accepted you. You deserve to suffer for all you have done, in fact this is mercy because you deserve death for what you did” she tells me then releases me with so much force that I fall to the hardwood floor.
She spits on me while the rest snicker and agree with her.
Once they leave, I get up slowly mindful of my pregnant belly, then leave the house.
I have no idea where I am going but I know I need to get out of there. While walking I think of the past, how Bianca used to adore me. We were inseparable back then, only one year apart, we were the best of friends.
Everywhere I went you would find Bianca there with me. She never left my side, always following me around like a puppy. I was her hero back then and she worshipped me as her older sister.
I became her hero when I saved her from a bee when she was five and I was six and since then we were joined at the hip.
We could always count on each other no matter what and she knew that I would always be there for her.
But that all changed when I was ten. I can still remember everything so clearly like it happened just yesterday.
Bianca was at one of her friend’s house so it was just me and my parents. I wasn’t feeling well but at around noon, I got this sudden urge to go to the forest and so being a curious ten year old I did.
I didn’t know where I was going but the feeling just stuck with me, like I was called from within to be at the forest.
After wondering for a while I gave up and decided to go home and that’s when I saw it, a shadowy figure, it had no form or clothes, just a black shadow but I could tell it was intelligent.
The red eyes shining through it told me all I needed to know.
I was fascinated by it and I wanted to touch it but just as I was about to I heard a twig snap. I turned around and found I was no longer alone, wolves surrounded me but something was wrong with them, they were not the normal wolves I knew and they were also not the rogues we had been taught.
They looked like they had gotten stuck mid shift. Not quite a man and quite a beast, they were disfigured and their eyes were all black, their skin was really ashy and they had black veins all over their bodies with form dripping down their mouths.
They terrified me and when one of them lunged at me with its claws slashing my neck open I screamed. I remember falling to the ground, feeling the blood drain from my body.
I was so cold and within minutes everything faded away. When I woke up I was surrounded by the pack still in the forest.
I miraculously stood up which shocked the hell out me only to find my parents laying on the ground torn into pieces with the pack accusing me of killing them.
I didn’t understand why they would think that, I tried to explain it to them, tell them of the creatures I saw but they thought I had made it up.
I was drenched in my parent’s blood, there was no other scent apart from mine and my parents and there was not even a scratch on my neck that suggested I had been wounded.
It was like all the evidence had been erased and so the only culprit left was me and thus I was termed as the ten year old killer who murdered her own parents in cold blood.
I was stripped of my position as a beta’s daughter and demoted lower than even an omega, they couldn’t kill me since I was a child and it was against the law but I always wished that they did.
My parents were simply the best anyone could ever ask for and they were loved by the pack so I became the enemy for killing them.
I never killed them but I also don’t know what happened after I lost consciousness and how my wound healed so quickly.
When Bianca was told that our parents were dead and that I was the one who killed them, I became the villain instead of the hero, she hated me so much that she moved to live with an uncle in another state without ever looking back.
The punishments and torture begin after that. I had questions I couldn’t answer, like what happened that day, did I honestly kill my parents and then imagined something that wasn’t real?
What was the shadowy form and what was it doing there but most importantly what were those creatures and where did they come from?
I shake my head trying to clear away the painful memories, would my life have been different if I had been proven innocent? Would Xavier have accepted me or would he still have chosen Bianca?
All these questions are swarming in my head making me cry even more thinking of the fact that things might have been different.
‘He doesn’t want you’
I hear voices hiss which scares the crap out of me making me jump, it’s like a thousand voices hissing at the same time.
‘He wants your sister’
‘He will never want you, you disgust him’
‘You’re nothing to him’
‘You’re just a pathetic unwanted mate’
‘You will never be worthy of him’
The voices keep taunting growing louder and louder, I try covering my ears with my hand but I still hear them.
“Stop it!” I shout turning around in circles trying to find where the voices are coming from and come face to face with red glowing orbs.
Even in the darkness I can still tell it is the same shadowy form because it’s thicker than the darkness around me. Scared, I turn around and run forgetting that I am pregnant.
I burst through the kitchen only to find Xavier and Bianca still there cooking a meal while they hold each other’s hands.
I don’t know what came over me, maybe it’s the adrenaline, or maybe it’s because I was scared out of mind at seeing something I never thought I would ever see again or maybe it’s just pure jealousy.
In that moment I lose control, fangs and claws come out and I dive at Bianca intending to attack her but before I can reach her, Xavier probably sensing what I was going to do painfully pins me to the wall choking me.
His elongated nails pierces the skin around my neck and I can feel the trickle of blood running down neck. I try to say something, anything but I can't.
I see black dots dancing around my vision making me aware that I am about to lose consciousness.
I try scratching at the hand around my neck but it’s of no use since everything around me fades and soon I am at peace.
