Determination

That night, after convincing the worried Elle that I was alright and wanted to sleep early, I bid her goodnight and was finally left alone in the room.

The moonlight shone through the cracks of the slightly opened curtains, illuminating the room.

I sat in front of the desk and contemplated my new life, trying to come up with a plan to survive in this completely a whole new world.

I grabbed a quill, or I don't know, this? Their pen? 

"Shit," I cursed when the ink splattered on my hand. 

Gosh, I wondered how people could write using this thing. 

Anyway, I had to make do for now so I dipped it into the ink to start writing what I knew from the story as best as I could.

First, Bella's magical powers were strong. They truly were tremendously powerful. I knew it was a fact, I saw it in her memory.

I don’t know if I was able to use it though. So I’d need to check it later. I underlined that point.

In the novel, Bella hid her ability so she could strike at the right moment. So at this point, nobody knew that she could perform magic, except for Elle, her one and only loyal nanny and companion.

Second, there was going to be a war in the near future. From what I remembered from the novel, it was a small country called Soma which was located on the southern border of the empire that would start a war. 

The Helios Empire wasn't weak. However, since the Soma Kingdom had never been a threat, the security of the southern border was neglected. As a result of this tiny mistake, their attack was successful.

It was a very embarrassing story for the empire. So the emperor sent the crown prince to the battlefield as reinforcement from the capital to boost the soldier's morale. 

The crown prince was only a year older than Bella and he was already the youngest sword master in the empire.

Like a typical male lead, of course he had to have a traumatic childhood. Tragedies give birth to heroes, was it? Well, only in books and movies anyway. 

As a crown prince, he grew up with a heavy burden on his shoulders. His mother, for some reason, always treated him coldly, unlike her attitude towards her daughter, Adellia.

Honestly it left me with a big question mark when I read that part of the story. I mean, why would his mother do that? It just didn’t add up.

On the other hand, his father, the emperor, wasn't exactly a loving father either. The emperor even sent him to fight in a war and monster subjugation ever since he was only ten years old.

What a scumbag of a father!! How could he do that to a child? I frowned.

Was that their sick method for raising a crown prince? Honestly, both of them were the worst kind of parents.

I could never get the logic of some parents who thought that it was their job to toughen their children up to face a cruel and heartless world. In my opinion, wouldn’t it be better to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless? 

I sighed. Okay, I can curse them later, so let's get back to the main point. 

During the war, the crown prince would meet the heroine, Maria Fersen, who was a priestess and a healer from the temple.

Of course priests weren't the only healers. It was also possible for a mage to have healing affinity and use healing magic. The proportion of priests who were also healers was less, but a mage being a healer was even rarer. Healing power was a rare affinity after all.

Bella was one of the lucky people who was born with multiple affinites, including healing. But of course, she never used it to heal others. What did you expect from a villainess anyway?

Back to the story, the lack of healers during the war made the heroine stand out, especially with her devotion and compassion when helping the warriors. It even caught the attention of the crown prince. Her kindness and her pure heart melted the frozen heart of the crown prince. Cliche.

So from that point on, their relationship started to grow and they fell in love with each other, yadda, yadda.

Meanwhile, Bella used that opportunity to gather supporters from the aristocratic faction which consisted of people who despised the current empress due to her lack of background and started a rebellion. She ended up successful at killing the Emperor and the empress, along with Princess Adellia, Bella's younger half-sister.

But of course, the fate of the novel was on the side of the heroine and not the villainess. Together, the good main leads took down the villainess. 

Bella had committed an unforgivable and terrible sin, so the crown prince sentenced her to public execution.

That was her ending. A guillotine.

There was also one more important point. Bella's power came with a price. It was a blessing and a curse at the same time. She had great powers but a weak body, so using her powers excessively took a toll on her body. You could say that it was actually a suicide mission she went on. She had prepared to die after killing all of the imperial family. It was mentioned in the novel that she was already dying when she was executed. To be honest, Bella's life really was pitiful.

"Shit!"

I put down the quil and placed my right hand on my head to massage my temple. Due to the stress that built up, my head had been aching since I woke up in this shitty world.

"Gosh, now I regret not reading those damn side stories that might’ve contained some important clues. Fuck!" 

I sighed at my situation. But, it was no use crying over spilt milk.

Talk about shitty luck. I mean, I always knew I hadn't got the best luck. After all, I did die at the age of twenty five just when I was going to enjoy my first ever vacation in my life after overworking myself like crazy. And now I possessed a character who was meant to die just for the sake of the novel’s plot. 

I shook my head. Okay, first things first. I could just not do any evil deeds from now on and not start a stupid rebellion or whatever. I should be able to survive if I stop all the stupid things Bella did before.

Or should I just run away?

But what was I going to do once I ran away? I didn't have enough knowledge about this world and I didn't even have any money. This was a foreign world, and I was just a clueless outsider. It was the same as signing my own death sentence.

I bit my lip. But it'd be too miserable for me to continue living here as a neglected princess.

I was definitely not one to endure the shitty treatment in a positive way, singing songs with mice like in fairy tales. Haish… Just thinking about that already made me cringe.

This is so fucking hard!

I heaved a huge sigh as I desolately stared outside the window into the night sky.

Then an idea suddenly popped into my head. That's it! I should win the favor of the main lead.

Crown Prince Alistair Calder Astaseul was a hero with a bleeding heart. If I played my cards right, I might gain his favor. And if I gain his favor, then it’d be easier for me to continue my life comfortably.

I might sound shameless. But I couldn’t afford being prideful nor being considerate of this body's original owner’s feelings. By all accounts, I'm in a more difficult situation than her right now, so why do I have to worry about her?

Anyway, speaking from experience, when you’re lacking power, you need to learn to take advantage of those that are powerful. If so, what I need to do is to wait while receiving help from someone else until my power grows. Even if that person happens to be someone I loathe, I have to take advantage of them to the fullest for my purpose. Cast aside my pride and survive by hanging in there and building up my power all on my own. After all, knowing how to take the hand someone offers is also another way of surviving. 

Yes, let's do that and live peacefully for a long time. 

I was given this second chance, so I would not lose it again. I'm Cho Sarang, I can get through this. I was determined.

But will I really be able to do that?

I thought of this and felt a shooting pain in my chest. I choked back tears, the real vastness of my situation finally settling in my mind.

The confidence I had earlier had vanished and in its place was despair, which I experienced for the first time since I arrived in this wretched alternate reality.

Come to think of it, I hadn't even had time to grieve my death. I didn't even feel this lonely when I was an outcast among my ex group members and even when a false scandal almost ruined my entire career.

But, it finally hit me. I was really dead. Cho Sarang was dead.

"Tae.. How will he react to my sudden death? Will he cry for me?" Tears started slipping out from my eyes.

I was starting to achieve something meaningful but all of a sudden I died. I was starting to find my happiness and it crumbled, just like that. I've never dated even once in my life, for heaven's sake. That's just so unfair!

I curled up into a ball and wrapped myself in the sheets as I mourned for a life that was so suddenly taken away from me. I cried so hard until I was out of breath and my voice became hoarse.