LOGINChapter 20: If I Touch You, I Won't StopMaren POVHe knocked.I looked at the door. It was midnight. Three nights since the garden, and I had not slept for more than an hour at a time. Linnet had not paced once. She had lain along my ribs, awake and watchful, and every time I closed my eyes she lifted her head and looked at the door.It was midnight. I was sitting on the end of my bed in the nightgown and the black robe, with the hook fastened at my throat and my hair loose down my back. Mint still hung in the curtains from the week before. In all the weeks I had lived in that wing, he had come through that door with no warning but the chirp of the lock. Once, only once, after the Moon Tea, he had knocked, and I had been too stunned to understand it."Come in," I said.The door opened. He stood in the frame.He did not come in."May I?"He had never asked before."Yes." It came out barely a sound.He stepped inside and closed the door, and the latch went home softly. Black shirt. Sle
Chapter 18: A Wolf Nobody OwnsCassian POVShe was gone before I could stand.I had held her for perhaps a minute. Then a cough came from behind the elm, small and sharp, and the white wolf lifted her head. She looked at me once. She rose in one long motion and went into the hedge without a sound, and the white of her vanished into the white of the snow.I went after her. Three strides. Then green smoke rolled across the path, so thick and so sharp that my eyes streamed and my nose stopped working. Mint. Mrs. Marsh stood beside the elm with a clay pot tipped on its side at her feet and a face that showed nothing at all."Forgive me, sire. For my cough.""At three in the morning.""It is a bad cough."By the time the smoke thinned, the trail was gone. *By dawn I had every roster.Staff. Guests. Guards. The families in the cottages along the lower road. Six hundred and forty names spread across the war room table, and Penn and four clerks working through them with tablets, checking e
Chapter 17: The Tea She StoppedMaren POVThe fever came on the seventh night.Seven days since Healer Wren's note. Seven days since I had stopped taking anything Judith had touched. The green thermos sat in the bottom drawer of my dresser, unopened. I ate only what Mrs. Marsh carried in herself, sealed, and I watched her seal it. I had not had a drop of that tea in almost three weeks, and my body had waited until now to tell me what it thought of that.It began in my bones.A dull ache in the jaw first. Then the wrists. Then the long bones of both legs, all at once, as I stood at the window after supper. I put my hand on the sill. It was hot. My palm was hot. I wiped my forehead with the back of my wrist and it came away wet.I thought of the elevator. His forehead against mine. His hands shaking on the glass. I held on to that, and it helped, a little, and then the next wave came and took it.By ten I could not hold a cup. By eleven I was on the floor of my bedroom with my back agai
Chapter 16: The Elevator Does Not StopMaren POVThe doors closed on the music.The elevator was small. Brass rails. A black marble floor. Mirrors on three walls, and a panel of buttons with a single silver crescent above the highest. Numbers glowed over the door. 44. 43.He had not said a word since the atrium.He smelled of snow, and wine, and under both of them the cold clean smell of pine that I would have known in the dark. It filled the small space. I breathed it in through my mouth, and then I stopped breathing at all, because it made my knees go soft.He had taken my hand at the edge of the floor and walked me through two hundred people without turning his head once. Now his fingers were still locked around my wrist. The blood from his palm had gone sticky between us.He let go.He stood facing the doors with his back to me. Broad shoulders. The cut on his jaw, half healed. I could hear him breathing, and it was too loud for a man standing still.41. 40.I counted the floors.
Chapter 16: The Hunt / What I Refused to SeeI stood in the wreckage of her room long after Penn left.Divorce papers lay scattered across the floor. I had thrown them there myself. I didn't remember doing it. The blue bottle was still in my hand, held so tightly the glass was warm. In my other hand was her phone, the screen lit. Her face was on it. A photograph she must have taken of herself, in some quiet moment when no one was looking. She wasn't smiling. She was just looking at the camera as if she were waiting for something.I couldn't put it down.I had never looked at that screen before. In all the months she had lived under my roof, I had never once seen what she kept on her phone. I had never asked. I hadn't wanted to know anything about her that I could not control.That told me everything about the kind of man I was.I turned the phone over. On the back was a small crack in the corner of the case. She had dropped it once. She had kept it anyway.Every cold word I had ever s
Chapter 15: The Harvest BallMaren POVThe atrium had been built to hold light, and tonight it held all of it.Silver lamps hung in rows from the glass ceiling. Under them, two hundred guests in black tie and long gowns stood in clusters across the marble floor, glasses raised, voices low. A string quartet played near the fountain. Beyond the glass, the pines stood black against the first deep snow of the year.I stood by a pillar at the edge of it all.Mrs. Marsh had dressed me herself. Black velvet. Long sleeves. A collar that rose to my jaw and closed at the back with eleven hooks she fastened one by one without a word. When she finished she looked at me in the mirror for a long moment, and she said, "Chin up, Your Grace," and nothing else.Nobody had spoken to me in forty minutes.They looked. A woman in green turned her shoulder as I passed. Two men at the bar stopped talking and started again once I was behind them. Across the room, Sloane stood in white beneath the biggest lamp







