Chapter 1

Lauren pov, 

I thought the sound of the waves outside my window would be enough to soothe the burning fire inside of me–but I was wrong. Coming to Greece had always been my getaway plan for me and my husband, but now I was standing in my hotel room alone. 

The air was laced with salt and heat, the promise of a home away from home, but mine had cancelled at the last minute. 

The hotel room was quiet, too quiet–I felt the impact against my chest. I shifted unto the edge of the bed, my laptop already propped open in front of me, as my fingers hovered over the track pad–I won't lie, I hesitated a bit before pressing play.

The video began with low moans, filtering through the speaker. I exhaled slowly before leaning back against the headboard. At first, I told myself that I was just doing it out of curiousity– I wanted to know how it felt to be touched again, trying to distract myself for a few seconds. But the more I watched, the more my mind betrayed me.

I tried imagining my husband's hands on me–trying to recall the last time he made me feel like a real woman, but I guess my brain couldn't grasp any, because he hadn't touched me in months, nor have he looked at me with any desire. The ache in between my thighs now wasn't about him at all, but still the guilt stung me sharper as the ladies moan grew louder with every thrust she was receiveing– and for a moment there, I couldn’t help but wish I was her at that moment.

My fingers slipped beneath my pants, which were underneath the waist bands of my shorts. I moved slowly, desperate to feel something–like closeness. I felt a wimp escape my lips as I clung to the fantasy of having my husband here with me, even though I knew deep down my feelings were already shallow.

“Lauren?”

My best friend's voice snapped me out of it. My heart skipped as I slammed the laptop shut just as the door got closed behind her.

“Oh–my–God–” Vivian froze by the doorway, then she broke into a mockery laugh, which made me ache a bit.

“You've got to be kidding me.” she whispered, placing her thumb over her brows.

I yanked the blanket over my lap as I felt my face boil up from shyness. “Don’t you knock?”

“”I did–” she pouted, “But it seemed you were too far gone to hear any of it.”

“But seriously, Lauren, you are watching p**n. On a vacation. Alone. Really?” she grinned, her ears stretched as her eyes gleamed with her persuasive wicked delight.

“And here I was thinking this trip was going to be a sunny getaway for a bunch of cocktails and bad decisions together.”

“Shut up, Vivian.. “ I muttered, burying my face into my hands. “This is already so humiliating.”

Vivian strolled over to the bed before flopping onto it and stationing herself close to me. Her laughter faded when she saw the look on my face.

“Calm down, Lauren, I'm not judging, okay? But seriously, this trip was supposed to be with Ezra. Why are you sitting here pretending you can be loved back by a freaking macbook?”

I felt my throat squeeze up on me. Immediately, she mentioned his name. I looked away, staring at the curtains , then down to the moonlight, which cut across the floor. 

“He had to cancel at the last minute because of work.”

“Work?” Vivian repeated, like it was the flimsiest excuse ever in the world.

“Lauren, may I ask you something?” She asked as I nodded in approval.

“Who turns down a vacation in Greece with their wives?–” 

Without waiting for an answer, she blurted out. “No one in their right senses darling–No one.”

My eyes burned as her words helped me place the pieces together, I tried holding back my tears from falling.

“That's why I asked you to come, and I'm glad you didn't turn me down.”

“Why would I say no to my best girl–” she teased.

The room became silent once more, as she studied me for a long moment.

“You don't deserve this, lauren–do not get me wrong, no one has the right to treat his wife the way yours treats you, and for that you really do not have to be stuck here in this hotel room.”

“Stop pretending like your marriage isn't killing you.” she added.

I shook my head firmly. Honestly, I knew she was right with every single word, but I wasn't going to back down in supporting my husband. 

“Don’t say that. I love Ezra.”

“I know you do.” she said, leaning closer. Her voice was sharp but soft at the same time. “But does he love you the way a husband should? Because from the look of things, you're only married on paper, lauren– and you, my friend, do not feel married. Not in here.” She tapped her chest.

I felt a lump formed against my throat as I tried hard to push it down. “You don't understand, Vivian. Marriage is more than sex.” 

I tried to cover up for him–stupid me.

“Sex is something married people enjoy,” she countered. “ Now let me ask you, when was the last time you actually enjoyed it? With him?”

I had no answer, no counterback, as I opened my mouth and closed it again. The silence stretched out once more, but time it was heavy.

“You are beautiful, smart, and here you are in Greece, for crying out loud.” She said, reaching out and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

“Why don’t we go out tonight? Have some fun. Meet people, and maybe find you a fling for these three nights we're here for.”

“Are you insane? I'm a married woman.” I said, my stomach twisted.

“Married,” she muttered, rolling her eyes and mimicking the way I sounded.

“But you are not living like one. You are not loved like one. You are neither touched like one, so what the hell are you saying?” Her gaze softened.

“Don’t you want to remember what it feels like? Just once? For yourself?”

I felt my heart race, torn in between the truth and my obligations as a well loving wife. I shook my head, trying to push the thought away.

“No. I can't and I won't.” I whispered

Vivian’s smirk increased as she leaned back on the bed like she had already won. “Okay, if you say so..” she paused, her eyes narrowing as she reached for her phone on the bedside table.

Just then her screen lit up and I saw “Ezra Len—.” across, bright and unmistakable.

Vivian froze for a second, then she casually ended the call before tucking the phone away like nothing had happened.

I blinked, unsure if I'd really seen it right. “Vivian–was that–”

She immediately cut in with a grin, “Now, where were we? Oh right–about tonight.”

I couldn’t find my voice, at one point I couldn't just suspect things and lose my best friend, I quickly shoved the thoughts to the back of my mind.

“Are you okay, Lauren?” she asked.

“Definitely–” I smiled.

“I know you better than you know yourself. And I promise you, Lauren Lennox … by the end of tonight, you won't be sitting in this room watching and touching yourself with the help of p**n.”