This Time, I'm the One Leaving First

I stepped out of the bathroom, shivering from head to toe.

I had forced myself to take a cold shower. If I came down with a fever tomorrow, I'd have an excuse to skip the family portrait.

I looked at my decade-younger reflection in the mirror, then at the project proposal I had once abandoned sitting on my desk. My eyes hardened with resolve.

In my previous life, my adoptive sister, Simone Graham, had booked a famous photographer she found online to take a family portrait.

It was the first time I had ever taken a family photo with the Grahams since they had welcomed me back into the family.

I'd looked forward to it for weeks. I'd even worn the most expensive dress I'd brought from the orphanage—one that I'd always been reluctant to touch.

But when we got the photos back, I had been cleanly photoshopped out of the corner.

It was all because Simone had casually said, "Felicia's vibe doesn't really match the rest of the family. The photo looks kind of weird with her in it."

Back then, I'd tried to defend myself, only to be accused of lacking taste and embarrassing the Graham family.

It took dying once for me to finally get the point.

Just like that family portrait without me in it, there had never been a place for me in this family.

If that was the case, why should I humiliate myself by trying to chase after them?

This time, I simply wouldn't go.

Just as I had planned, when I woke up the next morning, I was burning with a fever. I didn't even have the strength to get out of bed.

My head was foggy when I heard someone push my bedroom door open.

My mom, Riley Colton, stood there with a frown. "I called you several times. Why didn't you come downstairs for breakfast? We're supposed to take the family portrait today. Don't hold everyone up."

I coughed weakly.

"Mom, I'm not feeling well."

That was when she finally noticed my flushed face. She touched my forehead and recoiled at the heat. "You were fine yesterday. How did you suddenly get a fever? Simone worked so hard to get that photographer!"

"It's not her fault, Mom. I'm sure she didn't mean for this to happen," Simone said with a regretful expression. "Maybe we should reschedule the shoot. We can't just take the photo without her…"

I calmly cut her off. "It's fine. Don't worry about me. You guys can go ahead without me."

Riley froze. It looked as if she couldn't believe what she had just heard.

"You were the most excited for the family portrait."

I studied her face as I held back a dry laugh.

So she did know that I had been looking forward to it. Then why did she say I was being petty when I got upset after being photoshopped out of the portrait in my previous life?

It was because she didn't love me. My feelings never mattered.

"It's fine. Don't worry about me. You guys can go ahead without me," I repeated myself.

Riley suddenly exploded, "Fine. You said it yourself. Don't throw a tantrum when we're done!"

She dragged Simone out of the room, never once asking how I felt.

I lay staring at the white ceiling. Before I died, I had been just as lonely, lying in a hospital bed all by myself.

Even after I found my biological parents, got married, and had children, I was still Felicia Graham—someone nobody loved.

"Mom, Dad, I'll stop making a fuss this time," I thought. "I'll let the three of you be a happy family."