Wherever I Live.

Aunty Maggie took me in after my parents died. I unwillingly stayed with my grandparents for a few months after the funeral, but because I kept running away from home, they'd eventually let me stay with her. Only on condition that I visit every weekend. I wasn't too excited about that but it meant I didn't have to see their faces everyday anymore and I'd settled for that.

However, Aunty Maggie managed a few charitable organizations as giving back had always been her passion. Unfortunately for me, it meant she was never really around as she had too many people she needed to be there for.

She'd get calls as we sat having dinner and she'd be on her way to that person in a heartbeat, because that was the kind of person she was. One who would drop anything to help someone in need.

Not to mention she'd taken my mother in when she'd been disowned by her parents.

I guess I'd expected her to take on the mother role for me. I'd expected her to drop everything for me, because I guess I've always been a selfish person. I'm always expecting from others but I'm never giving. Right?

There were more than a few times we'd fought about her not being at home when I needed her. There were more than a few times I would run away angry to Tristan's house and she would call begging me to come back.

I made her feel bad for being the kind and giving person that she was.

Last time I spoke to her I'd told her I wanted nothing to do with her. That was when I'd gone to college and I hadn't seen her since.

But now as I stand looking at her dead form in the brown marble casket that is now her home, I take it back. I take it all back.

Aunty Maggie didn't have to take me in. She could've let the court give me to my grandparents but she didn't, she'd instead fought to keep me. She didn't end up winning and if we're being honest, she didn't stand a chance but that still didn't stop her from trying.

She'd then made sure I had a roof over my head and a nice warm meal whenever I needed one when I'd finally moved in with her. 

Sure she wasn't always there physically but she gave to me more than her presence. She gave me so much warmth and love. She saved me from getting raised by the two people I hated more than anything and I guess I'm more thankful for that. 

It's pretty late to say I'm sorry now though isn't it? She died thinking I hated her and now I have to live with that.

I move away from the front of the queue to let the person behind me get their turn of seeing the corpse. The hundreds of people in attendance only speak volumes of the kind of a person she was. The kind of person who'd drop it all for the greater good of others.

People recognize me and wish me their condolences as I make my way to her bedroom and I thank them kindly. There's nothing I hate in this world than funerals and I just need to get away from everyone's sappy faces.

"Mia?" I hear a voice sound as I stand by her room balcony letting the wind hit me softly.

I turn around and try to hide my disappointment as I stare at the boy who'd called my name.

I haven't seen Luke since he was in his early teenage years but I'd recognize him at any age. He's got one of those faces. Although it's worth noting that he got really cute.

"Hi Luke, how are you?" I greet the boy and we embrace each other in a hug that lasts too long, but I know it's because we haven't seen each other in a while, but also because it's his way of giving me his condolences without saying it. I appreciate that.

We move further on to the balcony after our embrace and we have seat on the chairs Aunty Maggie kept outside for her knitting days.

"You look great," I can't help but compliment him. He's really picked himself up from where he was the last time I'd seen him.

He'd fallen into gang violence and crime at such a young age and he'd done some cruel things in his life. I remember he even went to juvie a few times. 

He smiles and says, 

"I'm still shocked at how amazingly beautiful you turned out as an adult."  Of course I blush at that.

"Haha, you flatter me," I respond. 

"What are you getting up to these days?" I then ask softly, I need so bad to talk about anything but my life right now.

"Well, I've recently just opened up my firm. I know this is crazy to even imagine but it turns out I'm a pretty good lawyer," he responds making me laugh.

The person who's probably broken every law there ever was is now a lawyer. The irony.

"You've always been very smart. You were just too busy doing other things," I say to him honestly.

Luke was an orphan. He'd been moved around from foster home to foster home since he was a toddler and well, that messes up a person.

Aunty Maggie understood that and that was why she'd never stopped believing in him no matter how much trouble he would get in. She was always there to break him out of juvie and make sure he had everything he needed.

If I'm being honest, I never thought he would ever make it out of that life. That's how bad it was. But I was mistaken because looking at the older version of the same boy, I know that change is possible for anyone. Maybe even for me, who knows?

I know Auntie Maggie finally got through to him, she was influential in that way. I smile at that. 

"She missed you a lot you know," he now says to me and that warms my heart just as much as it breaks it.

"She used to tell everyone about her daughter who was some big accounting person in sandton," he continues to say to me and I wish he would stop. I know he means well but the last thing I need right now is a reminder that I abandoned her.

She never liked that I wanted to study accounting but that still didn't stop her from being proud of me. She was one of the few people who'd used to tell me to follow my passion, which was and I'm finding out, still is writing.

"Hey we should do dinner one of these days," he says after a while clearly sensing my discomfort. 

"Yea that would be great," I respond. I'm not in touch with any one else from my childhood anymore and I guess this would do me good. 

We continue to sit there chatting about the past, the present and the future. I'm the one asking all the questions and he notices this but doesn't question.

I know I'm going to have to face my inner demons soon enough but all I want right now is to welcome any and all distractions.