I take one last look at the love of my life as he makes his way out of my apartment to go see the love of HIS life. He waves me goodbye and blows me a kiss I happily catch then I smile at his smile. It makes my heart skip a beat and he knows it."Bye Nugget," he says then disappears into the night.It's been 10 years, 8 months, 65 days and counting. He says that I'm confused."You don't allow yourself to be loved," he always says to me, maybe he's right. But that's because my heart already belongs to him.I try not to talk about it a lot because I fear pushing him away. My biggest fear is not having him in my life. So I swallow my feelings just so he's more comfortable in the friendship.Tristan Brady is my best friend of many years. We met in high school when he'd asked me to tutor him.I wasn't always into him. In fact, for a while I couldn't stand him. He was a walking cliché and I'd called him out on it.He'd been shocked because no one had ever spoken to him like that before. He s

I stare at my computer screen as the thin line blinks for me to start typing. My heart is beating a mile a minute and my head is on a rampage. I shut my eyes tight and take a deep breath to keep myself from going crazy. In and out. And then it starts, just as I remember it. The words slip through my fingers like a song I know all too well. One word after the other, never ending. It's been so long that the feeling is so alien. I missed this.I finish a chapter in no time and find myself sighing in satisfaction. Writing has always been my calm through the storm. My drug.

I didn't want to go to the funeral.Listening to people telling me how sorry they are was the last thing I needed. Tristan said I'd regret it if I didn't go. He said it was important that I said my goodbye, that I won't see it now but I'll be thankful in the future. 

"You were late today," Mr Romano says sternly after I enter his office and close the door behind me. Our morning briefing was delayed because of the director meeting he had earlier. "I didn't know you needed me here early today," I respond calmly. I don't necessarily have a specific time I need to be at work. I just need to make sure that deadlines are met. It's in my contract. And so I look at him with a dare to say something about my lateness but he seems to think otherwise and just shrugs instead.

I feel a sharp pain shoot up my face as I turn myself around to lay my body sideway. The guilt eats at me as I stare at the bathroom door that's not my own but looks familiar. If Meghan didn't hate me before she definitely hates me now. I'd been ignoring Tristan's calls since this morning, I know what he wants to say to me but it's not necessary. I'm kicking myself down for the both of us.Last night I was really drunk and I did something I definitely regret. After Meghan threw her glass of wine at my face, I'd ran out of the club not knowing where I was going. I was beyon