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CHAPTER FORTY SIX - BACKING OUT, BACKING IN
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Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FORTY SEVEN - FINDING ANSWERS
JaylaMy back collides with the front of someone I am very familiar with. It is Tyler.I know without any doubt that he is the one. I can never miss his presence. It is as if when he is around, every fiber of my being is aware of his presence. I can't help but react to it. And I hate it. I hate how aware l am when it comes to him. I hate how familiar, effortless and easy it feels like to be close to him. And I hate how my body reacts to him.I hate how l can't reject him too. If I do, I would fall into a terminal illness or worse, I would die. That is how the Moon Goddess made us. If a lower rank rejects a higher rank, their heart stops and most of the time, they die. It is unjust and unfair but this is how it works and nothing will change just because of me.Maybe that is why I am doing this. Because everything seems so unjust that for once I want to be completely selfish and use others to get answers for myself. Even when I feel as if I am being used."Are you sure about it, Tyler?"
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FORTY EIGHT - SOMETHING WORSE THAN HEARTBREAK
JaylaAs he says that, my head snaps up to glance in his direction with surprise clearly reflected on my face.I didn't even expect him to speak up, let alone speak about his late mother. Someone I know he is super sensitive about. I wait for him to say something after that, but he does not and he keeps staring into the distance as if he is lost in thought.I know better than to disturb him in this moment. I know that he is mustering and arranging his thoughts to bring them to words. It is something I do a lot too. I am patient, yet a bit happy. I am getting my answers. My closure. As selfish as it might seem, I am really concerned about it.Though at the same time, a little part of me feels for him and I have an urge to go over to his side and comfort him, but that part has been locked up and burnt down by now. It is not welcomed in me anymore. So many expressions pass through his face from sadness to agony to pain, to hostility and then finally, determination. I am so close to call
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FORTY NINE - TRYING TO FIND A WAY TO MOVE ON
JaylaI am woken up by the shrill sound of the departure bell, and I open my eyes to find myself in the same classroom I passed out in. I hold my head in my hand I try to ease the throbbing pain that has spread through my skull, and I massage my temples.I feel exhausted and out of energy. My wolf is missing and it feels like l am no longer complete. Grumbling in annoyance, I stand up and I stagger a bit.I close my eyes, leaning against the wall as I remind myself that I am stronger than this. After some seconds, I get my balance back and walk out of the classroom only to see a sea of students exiting their classes because the school has closed for the day I sneak into the busy crowd and make myself a part of it. It is easier this way. It kind of surprises me how I was knocked out for the better part of the day and no one noticed that I wasn't around. And I am sure none of the teachers that taught in the classes I had today even bothered to find out why I wasn't in attendance.Not a
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FIFTY - EMERGING FROM THE OBLIVION
JaylaDarkness engulfs me. It is the same kind of darkness one would have witnessed during a long sleep, or even death. But surpringly, we never feel that darkness. Maybe because there are dreams and colourful motivations that keeps us from observing this darkness. That keeps us from falling into the trap of its calmness.It feels good being like that. In oblivion, in emptiness, without any worry, without any fear. It is just me here. There is no one to bother me, no one to hurt me. I can even float in this abyss of nothingness forever and ever.But what would I achieve? Nothing. What is a life without any accomplishments? What is a life without fears and failures? What is a life without an enemy and a weakness? What is a life without friends and strengths?We wake up everyday to fight this world for a place in it, and we wake up everyday in anticipation of happiness. Sometimes we find happiness, and sometimes we don't, but nonetheless, we still wake up. So I have to wake up. I can't
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FIFTY ONE - REGRETS
JaylaHis words echo in my brain several times before I can finally make some sense out of the complete and utter lie."No! I am not the Luna!" I say, trying to defend myself but he just scoffs."For how long do you think this veil of innocence will work? We know the truth. Everyone does. Everyone saw that day in school how you entered with Alpha Jasper, looking all loved up. You two were walking like couples, like mates, and your ex-boyfriend even got jealous. What is his name again? Ah! Beta Tyler."Tyler's name sends shivers down my spine but the kidnapper thinks that it is a sign of me getting scared so he smirks."You think that Jasper is my mate because we walked into school together?" I asked exasperatedly. How could they be so shallow?"And your ex-boyfriend got jealous. Also, you are calling Alpha Jasper by his name, and an Alpha only allows his mate to do that," he concludes."No! No! No!" I whisper in frustration. "You are getting it all wrong! Jasper is not my mate! He is j
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FIFTY TWO - AN EMERGENCE
When I was a kid, I used to have nightmares about being stabbed in the stomach repeatedly. At one point, I used to get them every night and I used to wake up screaming. At the age of nine, they became more detailed and frequent than ever. Soon, I started puking in fear and then I developed a habit of hurting myself in my sleep in order to minimize the effect of those nightmares. It was unnatural and unexplainable as to why I got those nightmares as a kid. As a small nine year old kid, I wasn't supposed to dream about crime and violence being inflicted upon me. And again especially such detailed and graphically accurate ones. They were repetitive. Every night I got the same dream. Then I started to hate sleeping. I was afraid that l would witness the same horror again. Mom and dad talked about the problem to each other and another doctor in the pack, and soon I was given sedatives that were mixed with chemicals which had an inhibitory effect on my pons. And pons is a part of the hind
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FIFTY THREE - AFTER HIS DECISIONS
TylerSometimes I wonder if people even care. Walking through the school hallways, I notice how people look at me, observing and evaluating each step I take, criticizing me behind my back, and when l am looking they make way for me. Sometimes you feel like everyone is supporting you, but actually they are waiting for your downfall. They will be with you when you are at the top but once you fall, they go away too.I keep my gaze straight. I don't let it stray because of whispers and chuckles. Because now I know that they certainly don't care. And I shouldn't either. People around you are like the nature, the environment around a plant. They sure do influence you, and you might never flower if they aren't kind to you, but in the end, Spring has to come and sooner or later, you will bloom. Survive the Fall, that is all you have to do.***"No, I don't want to understand anything. You have to bring us the birth certificate, that is it," I say, shaking my head and massaging my temple, tr
Unwanted By The Beta CHAPTER FIFTY FOUR - REALIZATION
Tyler -What happened?- I ask Chase, standing immediately in alarm. My body goes on full defense mode. I ball my fists up and my eyes become alert. It could be anything. My pack, my mate, anything.He is silent for a minute, scaring the crap out of me before he speaks in a low voice.-I am not sure if I am right, Tyler. But I think ... I think I can feel Jayla's wolf calling for us. It is the craziest thing ever. I can somehow feel her desperation, panic and fear. It is like she is waiting for us to come, to do something. But I can't! Dammit! I can't connect to her. Everything feels blurry and hazy... I don't even know what to do. I am scared, Tyler. Where is she?-Chase sounds almost breathless in fear, anticipation and agony and I am even petrified by now. First of all, she has left. And secondly, we can't even find her. Had she been close, in this territory, we would have felt her. But we don't. Does that mean she has left the pack altogether?Oh Goddess. My head starts throbbing
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