LOGIN“Jer! I know you’re home, open up!”
Ryan’s fist hammers against the door and the sound tears through the apartment, sharp and demanding. He’s here. Actually here, on the other side of that door, and I don’t understand how this is possible. I didn’t tell anyone I was coming to Jeremy’s—not my parents, not even Reina. The only person who knew I was going to the clinic was Reina, and I never mentioned Jeremy’s name. So how does he know? Jeremy’s already moving toward the door and panic floods through me so fast I don’t think, just react, grabbing his arm and digging my fingers into his sleeve hard enough that he stops. “Wait.” I say, pulling him back. “Please, wait.” He turns to look at me and I can see the confusion spreading across his face, his eyebrows pulling together. “What’s wrong?” “He can’t know I’m here,” I say, keeping my voice low even though Ryan’s still pounding on the door. “Please, Jeremy. Don’t tell him I’m here.” “Cam, I don’t understand, why would—” “Please.” My voice cracks and I hate how desperate I sound but I can’t stop myself. “I’m begging you. Just—don’t tell him. Don’t let him know I’m here.” “JER!” More pounding, violent enough that I’m surprised the door doesn’t splinter. “Come on, man, I know you’re in there!” Jeremy’s looking at me like he’s trying to solve a puzzle, his eyes searching my face, and I can see the war happening behind them—loyalty to his best friend versus whatever he’s reading in my expression right now. “Jeremy, please,” I whisper, and my fingers are still gripping his arm so tight I’m probably leaving marks. “I didn’t tell anyone I was coming here. Not my parents, not Reina, nobody. So if he knows I’m here, if he somehow knows—” I watch it click into place. His eyes widen slightly and his whole face changes, jaw tightening, and suddenly he’s not looking confused anymore. He’s looking angry. “Turn off your phone,” he says, voice dropping to a whisper. “Right now.” “What? Why would I need to—” “Cam, just trust me on this. Turn it completely off. Not silent, off.” My hands shake as I pull my phone from my pocket and hold down the power button, watching the screen go dark. “Good. Now come with me.” He grabs my duffel bag with one hand and my wrist with the other, pulling me down the hallway so fast I almost trip, shoving open his bedroom door and pointing toward the closet. “Get in there. Don’t make a sound no matter what you hear, understand? I’ll handle this.” “Jeremy—” “Please, Cam. Just trust me.” I slip into the closet and he closes the door, leaving just enough of a gap that I can breathe, and through the crack I watch him take a breath, roll his shoulders back like he’s preparing for something, then walk back toward the front door. I hear it open. “Took you long enough,” Ryan’s voice says, and it’s so close now, inside the apartment. “Where is she?” “Good to see you too, man,” Jeremy says, and he sounds so calm, so normal, like Ryan didn’t just pound on his door hard enough to wake the entire building. “What are you talking about?” “Don’t play stupid with me, Jer. Camille. I know she’s here.” My heart is slamming so hard against my ribs I’m convinced they can hear it from the other room, convinced every beat is giving me away. “She was here,” Jeremy says after a pause that lasts just long enough to sound believable. “Stopped by maybe five, ten minutes ago. But she didn’t stay.” “Where’d she go?” “Didn’t say. Seemed upset about something, wouldn’t really talk to me. Just grabbed some stuff she’d left here a while back and took off again.” “You’re lying to me.” “I’m not. You want to search the place? Be my guest.” I hear footsteps-heavy boots on hardwood, the kind of deliberate stride that says Ryan’s looking for something and I press myself back against the wall of the closet, trying to make myself smaller, trying not to breathe too loud. The footsteps get closer and stop right outside the bedroom. “The tracker said she was here,” Ryan says, and his voice is coming from maybe ten feet away now, just on the other side of the closet door. “Her phone pinged at this exact address fifteen minutes ago.” Tracker. The word hits harder than it should. He’s been tracking my phone. How long has he been tracking my phone? “Well maybe her phone’s not far from here then,” Jeremy offers, and I can hear him moving closer too, probably following Ryan into the bedroom. “She could’ve dropped it somewhere by accident.” I hold my breath as footsteps move around the room—I can see shadows shifting through the crack in the closet door, can see Ryan’s silhouette as he walks past. He stops. Right in front of the closet. I watch his hand reach toward the closet door handle and my entire body goes rigid, every muscle locking up because this is it, he’s going to open it, he’s going to find me, and I don’t know what happens after that but I know it won’t be good. His fingers wrap around the handle. “Ryan,” Jeremy’s voice cuts in sharp, and I hear him move closer. “Man, I already told you she’s not here. You really think I’d lie to you?” Ryan’s hand pauses on the handle but doesn’t let go. “Then you won’t mind if I look.” “Actually, I do mind. This is my bedroom and my closet and I’m telling you there’s nothing in there except my clothes and some shit I need to donate. You want to search the place? Fine. Search the living room, search the kitchen, hell, check under the couch if it makes you feel better. But I’m not letting you tear through my personal stuff like I’m some kind of suspect.” The silence stretches so long I think I might pass out from holding my breath. Then Ryan’s hand drops from the handle. “If she comes back here,” Ryan says, hand dropping back to his side as he turns away, “you call me immediately. You understand?” Relief crashes through me so violently I nearly gasp. “What’s going on, Ryan?” Jeremy asks, and there’s an edge to his voice now. “You disappear for three months without a word to anyone, and now you show up at my door in the middle of the day looking for your fiancée like you’re hunting her down. What happened?” Silence stretches between them and I can feel the tension even from inside the closet. “That’s none of your concern,” Ryan finally says, voice flat and cold. “Just call me if you see her.” “Sure, man. Whatever you need.” More footsteps, moving toward the front door this time. The door opens. Closes. I count to ten, then twenty, barely breathing, waiting to make sure he’s actually gone. “He’s gone,” Jeremy calls out, voice carrying down the hall. I shove the closet door open and stumble out, my legs shaking so badly I have to grab onto the doorframe to keep from falling.“Camille.” Her voice comes through sharp and brittle like broken glass. “Mom, I can explain— there are some things we need to talk about. Things I need to tell you.”“Well I’m listening, Camille. What is it?”I open my mouth but the words stick in my throat.How do I tell her about the pregnancy over the phone?“I just—I need you to understand why I did what I did. It wasn’t some silly fight or me being dramatic. He was—”“Ryan’s mother called me this afternoon,” Mom cuts me off, her voice cooling. “She told me you’re planning to leave him. She said there are some things you need to clarify. What’s going on?”“I already left him, Mom. It’s been over a month. I gave back the ring.”There’s a pause and I hear her inhale sharply.“You gave back a three-carat diamond? Camille, do you have any idea what that ring cost? What kind of message that sends to his family?”“I don’t care what message it se
Jeremy sets his brush down so fast it rolls off the palette and onto the drop cloth.He’s across the room before I can blink, his socked feet sliding slightly on the hardwood, and then he’s on his knees beside the couch with his hands hovering near me like he wants to touch but isn’t sure if he should.“Where?” he asks. “Where did you feel it?”I move one hand lower, pressing against the spot where I think the movement came from. “Here, I think. It’s hard to tell, it’s so—”It happens again right as I’m trying to explain it and my eyes fly wide. “Oh my god. There. It did it again.”Jeremy’s staring at my stomach like if he concentrates hard enough he’ll be able to see through the layers of clothing and skin to watch the baby moving inside.“Can you feel it from the outside?” he asks, his voice tight with barely contained excitement.“I don’t know, I’ve never—I don’t know how this works.”Without thinking, withou
A few days pass and nothing catastrophic happens.No more anonymous texts lighting up my phone in the middle of the night.No more stories about Ryan drunk and breaking things at expensive restaurants.Just quiet, ordinary days where I try to push thoughts of him into a box in the back of my mind and pretend everything is fine.It doesn’t always work.Sometimes I’m washing dishes and my hands go still under the running water because I remember the way Ryan grabbed my wrist at the café.Sometimes I’m folding laundry and I catch myself checking the windows, making sure the locks are turned, listening for footsteps in the hallway that sound too familiar.But mostly I can go hours without thinking about him, can focus on the small ordinary things like what to make for dinner or whether I should finally finish the book I’ve been reading for two weeks.Jeremy helps without even meaning to, just by being here, by filli
I nod against his shoulder. “I used to think Ryan was the best guy I knew,” he says, staring straight ahead at the dark apartment. “Loyal and driven and fun to be around. The kind of friend you could count on for anything, the kind of guy who’d have your back no matter what.” He pauses and I wait, not wanting to interrupt whatever he’s working himself up to saying. “But then I met you,” Jeremy continues, and his voice gets quieter, more careful. “And I started seeing things I didn’t want to see. The way he talked about you when you weren’t in the room, like you were a possession he’d acquired. A trophy he’d won. Something he owned instead of someone he loved.” My chest gets tight and I have to force air through my lungs. “Why didn’t you say anything?” I ask. “Because I told myself it wasn’t my place,” Jeremy says, and I can hear regret th
The next morning I find Jeremy in the kitchen making coffee and the smell of it turns my stomach but I force myself to walk in anyway.He looks up when he hears me and whatever he sees on my face makes him set the coffee pot down immediately.“What happened?”I unlock my phone and hold it out to him without saying anything, my fingers tight around the case.He takes it and I watch his face change as he reads the text from the unknown number, watch the way his mouth goes flat and his eyes go cold reading the message.“That’s not Ryan’s number,” Jeremy says, and his voice is tight.“I know.” I wrap my arms around myself. “He’s using a burner or something. A number I won’t recognize so I’ll answer thinking it’s someone else.”Jeremy hands my phone back to me and holds out his hand again. “Give it here.”“What are you going to do?”“I’m blocking it,” he says, and there’s steel in his voice that I’ve never h
I watch Ryan stare at the velvet box sitting between us on the table and I wait for guilt to hit me, wait to feel bad about hurting him, but there’s nothing.Just relief.Relief that I don’t have to carry this ring around anymore, don’t have to hide it from Jeremy, and don't have to pretend it means something when it stopped meaning anything months ago.Ryan’s hand trembles slightly when he reaches for it and he opens the box, looks at the diamond catching the café lights, and I can see him trying to process this, trying to understand how we got here.“I bought this with my first bonus,” he says quietly, and his voice sounds hollow. “Spent three months’ salary on it because I wanted it to be perfect. Wanted you to show it off to your friends.”“I know,” I say.“And you’re just giving it back? Just like that?”“Just like that.”His hand closes around the ring box and his knuckles go white.“I don’t want
I’m still in bed when Jeremy comes back three hours later, propped up against the pillows, the plate of toast and scrambled eggs he made me eat sitting empty on the nightstand.“It’s done,” he says, holding up my phone. “Everything’s wiped. I had him do a full factory reset and reinstall everythin
I wake up to the feeling of something cool pressed against my forehead and for a second I don’t know where I am, I don't remember how I got here.The ceiling above me isn’t mine.Neither is the bed.I try to sit up and a hand gently pushes me back down.“Easy,” Jeremy’s voice says from somewhere cl
Jeremy’s standing in the hallway watching me and the second he sees my face his whole expression shifts, concern replacing everything else.“Cam—”“Tracker,” I cut him off, and my voice sounds strange in my own ears, too high and unsteady. “What tracker was he talking about? How does he know where
I’m on the phone with Reina telling her about the new bookstore that opened downtown when Doctor Kent walks in carrying a manila folder.“Hey, the doctor just walked in,” I say into the phone. “Let me call you back.”“Okay babe, let me know what she says,” Reina says, and I can hear traffic in the







