Chapter 2

Jasmine’s POV

“What do you mean by I’m being weird?” I asked, feigning ignorance. He looked at me for a couple of seconds before sighing. He started the car and eased out of the parking lot.

“It’s probably just me seeing things. Plus, you look stressed. Should I speak to Damien regarding your workload?” He asked, and I scoffed. I already have to work twice as hard to prove to my coworkers that I got the job based on my skills, and having him step in is just going to make things worse.

“No, I’m doing okay, and I don’t need you speaking to my boss,” I replied curtly, and I saw how his hands tightened around the steering wheel, and I felt bad for snapping at him like that. It wasn’t his fault that I hung on to the hope that one day, he would look at me like I mattered.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap. I just need more sleep, and my workload isn’t anything I can’t handle.” I added immediately, and he looked away from the road to smile at me. My insides turned into jelly, and I found myself smiling back at him. Damn you, Hunter Carrington, for always making me cave.

“We are here!” He announced as we walked into one of the luxury malls on North Avenue. He reached out to hold my hand instinctively, and I let him hold it. I took a glance at our conjoined hands, and it made me wonder what it would feel like to be a real couple. I stopped my train of thought as he held out the door to Tiffany Co. for me. I walked in, and instantly, a store manager approached us, smiling.

“We will let you know if we need any help.” Hunter smiled at her curtly before pulling me gently in the direction of the rings. I felt dread settle over me; this was happening. I was helping him pick a ring for another woman, and closing the door on the possibility of an ‘Us’ ever happening. It shouldn’t feel this gutwrenching, but it did. Hunter trailed off beside me, not noticing me taking quick, deep breaths to regulate my anxiety. I was trying not to have a meltdown beside him.

“What do you think of this cute one?” He asked, snapping me out of the thoughts that were drowning, and I picked it up to look at it. I didn’t know why, but I slipped it on, and I raised it to look at it in the light. It felt oddly satisfying. I loved how the little pink flower made out of diamonds looked against my skin. I realized what I was doing and scrambled to get the ring off my finger. Hunter’s hand stopped me.

“It looks so fucking beautiful on your hand. Please keep it, I will pay.” He said in a low voice, and I turned to look at him. I could swear I saw something in his eyes, but it disappeared right before I could tell what it was. I smiled back and tried to shrug it off as normal. He bought me gifts all the time; this wasn’t new. So why was it making my heart race way too fast?

“My girl likes shinier things actually, so we need a ring that screams ‘look at me, I’m engaged to Hunter Carrington,’ maybe a 12 carats or something,” He chipped in, and I felt like a bowl of cold water was just emptied on me. Something about the way he called her his girl made my skin crawl, and if I don’t get out of this space soon, I may have a meltdown.

“I don’t think this is the right store for that, though. Have you tried seeking out custom jewelers? You have to create something special for her. Rings have meanings.” I responded, trying to sound as casual as I could. I saw him pause for a moment before nodding in agreement. Thank Heavens he agreed, I would have collapsed right on this floor.

The walk to the car was silent, with both of us occupied in our thoughts. Thankfully, Hunter didn’t put me through any more torture by talking about his ‘girl’ and it was as if he could sense something was wrong with me. As soon as he pulled up in front of my apartment. I got down quickly, and I waved as I rushed inside. My car was in the parking lot. I guessed Hunter had someone drop it off. I slid down the door as soon as it locked after me, and I let the tears I had been holding in all afternoon fall.

Nobody deserved this kind of pain, not me especially. How could he choose somebody else despite me being there at every point of his life? I always thought the time when he would want me would come, but I was just a hopeless romantic. I couldn’t keep living my life like this. I threw the shopping bag with the ring far across me. I needed to stop interpreting his actions. Hunter would never want me in the way that I wanted, and while it may hurt me, maybe I have to settle for it. But do I really deserve to stay in this kind of life, one where I have to live with the fact that I will never be chosen by the one person I want?

I walked up slowly to the cabinet and pulled out my secret tequila stash, and I walked back to the sitting room to turn on the TV to watch another episode of Criminal Minds. At least I can get him out of my mind if I have to spend the rest of the night watching serial killers get caught. I didn't pour myself a shot; I drank straight from the bottle, welcoming the burning liquid down my throat, and the numbness afterwards was worth it.

I don’t know how long I have been drinking for, but the urge to do something stupid and blurt my feelings for Hunter was getting stronger. I got up from the couch on wobbly feet, and I tried to find my phone. Every part of me was screaming how much of a bad decision this was, but you know what they say about alcohol.

I finally found the device on the kitchen counter, and I realized it was dead. I wobbled around the sitting room trying to find my charger, and the loud shrill of my doorbell stopped me in my tracks. I looked at my wristwatch; it was a little after midnight. Who would be looking for me by this time? I walked to the door, and I peeped into the peephole. Hunter was leaning against my front porch rail. I think the universe is out to get me tonight.

I took a few calming breaths before I punched in the code and pulled the door open. Hunter breezed past me, and his perfume smell was replaced by something heavy; he had been drinking. He reeked like he was dumped into a bottle of scotch and left to dry. I turned around after locking the door, and I half expected to find him on the couch or somewhere else, but he was standing a few feet from me, and looking intensely at me.

“You look so beautiful, Jas. I don’t know if it’s the alcohol or it’s just the atmosphere. But you look like a beautiful flower in the garden.” He whispered as he walked towards me, and I stood there rooted to the floor. I have always imagined him looking at me the same way he was now, telling me how beautiful I look, but none of that came close to how hearing it live made me feel.

I felt seen, like the most beautiful woman on earth. The way he looked at me, with his eyes focused slowly on me, made my stomach swirl. There was no hint of a joke in his eyes, and he looked like he was drinking in my appearance. He cupped my face gently. I didn’t even realize he had gotten that close to me.

“I’ve been dying to know what your lips taste like, Jas. Can I?” He whispered as he leaned closer. I should stop him; we were both too drunk, and this could potentially harm our friendship, but the words won’t form in my mouth. I looked up at him, and my gaze flickered back to his lips. I would be a liar if I hadn't imagined how they would feel on mine. I nodded slowly, and that was all it took.

Hunter lowered his head and captured my lips in a sensual kiss. The stars exploded in my head as he pulled me closer and his arm circled around my waist.

Is this what heaven feels like?