Darkness surrounds me and I feel weighed down unable to move. There are sounds that I can barely make out since my hearing is muffled but I think I hear beeping. I try to rouse my consciousness to force my eyes to open but they are so heavy they refuse to respond.Come on! I need to know where I am. Where is Lance? Am I dead?Murmurs reach my ears and I strain to focus on understanding them.“Here - dinner Lance. Now - you go.”Go? Go where? Leaving me? No! Lance!My mind is in a panic, and I am frustrated that I can’t wake myself up. I feel a warm touch and my senses focus again on what is happening to my body.“Hey there my girl. How long are you going to make that poor boy wait for you? In fact, we are all waiting for you to wake up and tell us off for worrying so much.”I want to cry hearing the pain in my uncles voice. I would recognise him anywhere, but I still cannot get my body t

It feels good to finally have her home and safe where I can keep her close to me. Anton parks the car outside the front doors, and I climb out of my side before walking around to open her door. Anton opens the boot and fetches the wheelchair out while I lean in to gather Rayne into my arms. “Welcome home baby.” She smiles a small smile at me for my greeting, but she is still quite reserved, so I won’t push for more. I know this situation is hard on her and until she is willing to open up to someone about her feelings all we can do is be here for her.                 I walk into the mansion with her in my arms and we are greeted by all the staff holding a banner saying, ‘Welcome Home Rayne.’                 “Surprise!” They yell.            &n

Lance is being so sweet. I have become utterly dependent on him for keeping my emotions in check as well as helping with anything I cannot use my legs to do. Seeing Stripe today helped me in so many ways I am not even sure Lance is aware of just how much it helped. For weeks I have felt at a loss and not known what to do about anything. Sitting with him in the office reading, while he works helped at first, but now it’s not enough to keep my mind from dwelling. Shortly after settling in, I retrieved the necklace Lilli gave me from my drawer and I have kept it close debating if I should use it or wait to see if something happens to Lance. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I used it to get my legs back only to lose him to something that he could have survived if it had kept it. Naturally, this constant debating with myself is slowly driving me crazy, so seeing Stripe actually put many things into perspective for me. I cannot live my life in a ‘what if’

I wake, unsure when I fell asleep or why but then notice that I’m not sleeping directly on a mattress. I am extremely comfortable, and I lift my head to discover that I am laying on Rayne.                 Ah, now I remember.                 I glance at her features, and she seems to be content considering what happened only a few hours ago. A deep gnawing pain bites at my stomach as I think about my confession to her, and I came close to doing the same thing Ethan almost succeeded in doing.                 Suddenly I feel sick to my stomach, and I gently separate myself from her before rushing into the bathroom to throw up. I stay in there for a few minutes glaring at my reflection in the mirror.     &

Lance made love to me for two hours after I finally convinced him to let go of his fear. All the time I was dealing with my own demons, but I know my mind and my body well enough to understand that his touch would help me overcome at least some of it.                 What is beautiful about it all is that he let himself go in a way he never has with me before and I loved every moment of it. There wasn’t one moment where I felt overwhelmed to the point that I had to ask him to stop. If anything, I enjoyed it more than any time before because of how primal it felt. And the best part of all is I could feel everything.                 Yes, there is a little demon in the back of my mind telling me that if Ethan had breached that final barrier, then I would have been at the mercy of feeling that too. But I take solace in know