บททั้งหมดของ What If I Do?: บทที่ 11 - บทที่ 20

"Torete! Tore—eh—ete! Toreh—te sayo oh!!" I immediately block my ears. God, baka mabasag ang eardrum ko sa matinis na boses ng babaeng yun!"Why can't they just shut the fucking door?! Ano naman kung birthday party yan?" I heard someone says from room 14 when I opened the door of room 13. I can't blame them though, they were right. Nasa room 14 na nga sila pero nagrereklamo pa rin. Ano pa kaya sa akin? Kahit siguro makarating ng room 25 ay dinig pa rin ang ingay sa room 12 dahil sa lakas ng tunog. Shit, para silang mga nakainom na nagwawala!"They are all ridiculous! You know what, I've asked them to close the door but they just told me to bear the noise?! Isn't that hilarious?! Sila pa ang may ganang magsab—"I already shut the door of the room, hindi na pinatapos ang sinasabi ng babae sa room 14. Pero bullshit naman, kahit dito sa loob ng room na sound proof ay naririnig ko pa rin iyong ingay na nanggagaling sa kabila! OMG,

I pity Loisa for experiencing this. Drellia could be a freak sometimes. She couldn't control her emotions. She grew up getting everything she wanted to get. In short, she's a spoiled brat. Mess with her and you'll live like hell."Drellia, stop it! Loisa is out of whatever you and Haloid have!" I said. Natigilan si Drel sa sinabi ko at tumingin sa akong ng hindi makapaniwala."So, you're on her side now, Ren? You're with that bitch?! You really don't have any idea about how I feel! How could you just tell me to stop?!" She exclaimed, tears starting to stream down her face.I looked away. Guilt started to build inside me. I couldn't speak because she's right. I don't have any idea about how she feels. Knowing the feeling and feeling the same pain is different. I just feel her pain but I actually don't care because I'm not sure. I haven't experience that. About how much pain she was carrying inside her."I'm sorry, Drel, but I also understand her point of v

Actually, he's not that bad. He can be the type of my ideal man, minus him being a weirdo and annoying. Though he's not really annoying. Argh, whatever."Satisfied?" He suddenly asked and turned his gaze at me. Mabilis akong nataranta at nagiwas ng tingin. Nagkunwari pa akong nagtitingin sa kuko just so he couldn't notice me staring at him.But I failed."Tsk."I look at him. "H-huy! Baka akala mo t-tinititigan kita ha? Asa ka!""Liar," he whispered but I still heard it.Tumayo ako at pinagpagan ang pangupo, he wouldn't see it anyway because he's not looking at me."I'm not! I heard it. You know, you're not just a weirdo! You're an asshole too!" depensa ko. "A-Assuming ka rin pala!"He immediately shot me a glare, a creepy one. Inilagay ko sa likod ng tainga ko ang ilang hibla ng buhok na humaharang sa mukha ko saka agad na dinagdagan ang sinabi."Fine, sometimes! In some way, happy?" I even smiled at him awkwardly.

I inhaled and exhaled, trying to calm myself. I admit it, I can be a freak sometimes so I would just leave before I could do something that I will just regret later. It's easy for me to leave because that is what I always do.I held onto the railings and sniff the cold air. Nasa may rooftop ako ng building.I closed my eyes. Dinama ko ang hangin at unti unting kinakalma ang sarili.Every time I feel stressed I would always go to places that are not crowded and relaxing. Unlike others, I don't go straight to a bar or a club. Pero kung hindi ko na talaga kayang tiisin ay iniinom ko na lang because that way, I can just easily forget everything.But sometimes I failed to forget, they remain in my head."You look stressed."I almost jump because of shock when I heard someone speak behind me. I immediately opened my eyes and turned around just to see his face!"P-palaka—I mean, Weid," I said. I was even holding my chest. I fought the

Kinabukasan, maaga akong umalis. I don't have any idea and guts of how to face my parents after what just happened last night. So I went to school but because it was only 4 in the morning, I just went to the near coffee shop.I stayed there for the whole 2 hours. When I felt bored, I entered the campus and decided to take a nap in the clinic since I still have 1 more hour before the classes start. Honestly, this is the first time I did this that's why I'm not shocked anymore when I saw the nurse's reaction upon seeing me.When the clock strike at 9, the bell rang. That's my cue to get up and made my way to my classes.Everything went smoothly. I haven't seen Drellia, she's not around. Julie and Dave didn't talk about her and one thing I've noticed, they were distant from me. I don't know if it's because of what I did? Siguro iniisip nila na ayaw ko na sa kanila but honestly, it's not like that. I always want to be with them even if they were so annoying all the