Jane My first Christmas with all four pups should be a joyous occasion. After all, every Christmas I’ve known since becoming a mother has been tainted by Paisley’s absence. I’ve wanted nothing but the ability to bring her home where she belongs for as long as I can remember… and yet it takes all my strength just to get myself out of bed in the morning. Three weeks have passed since we returned from the Southern Isles. We had all our things shipped from the penthouse in the first couple of days we were home, and though having all their favorite toys and possessions back helped the pups adjust, they’re still furious with me for taking them from Ethan. It’s amazing how such young pups can hold a grudge for so long, but they don’t forget easily, and they wouldn’t even talk to me the first week we were here. They’ve gradually warmed up a bit – though not without a good bit of bribery on my part, offering sweets or fun activities like ice skating and sledding. It was something of a shock

Jane “Come on munchkins, we’re going on an adventure!” I announce, “get your coats.” The pups look at me suspiciously. “What kinda venture?” Riley asks. Their first therapy session had helped more than I expected. I don’t know everything they talked about with the doctor, but I expect having another adult reassuring them that they were loved and safe helped set them at ease. They still aren’t really talking to me, but they’re not fighting me as hard as they were before either. The hardest part is still when they wake in the middle of the night crying out in fear, then asking for Ethan when I go to comfort them. It’s the worst with Paisley. She’s never lived without her father before, and I’m trying to keep a special eye on her. She asks for him more than any of the others, and it seems most difficult for her to believe we can’t simply call him and ask for a visit. The more time that passes the angrier I become with Ethan for leaving our babies. It’s one thing to hurt me, but anoth

3rd Person “Okay, so how’re we gonna do this?” Paisley asked, sitting around a large piece of construction paper with her siblings. Ryder – who had the best handwriting of all four – had written “Opration Santa” at the top of the page. Other than its title however, the page was entirely blank. “Well, we know the North Pole’s at the top of the world, right?” Riley asked, waiting until the others nodded in agreement before continuing. “So if we just keep walking north then eventually we’ll have to get there!” “Yeah but that could take ages!” Parker cautioned. “The Dark Moon pack is north, but there’s at least two other packs between us and the pole.” “Tha’s a good point.” Ryder agreed, “So maybe if we travel to one of the other packs and start there?” “Yeah! But we can’t take too long, we have to make sure we can get there and back afore Christmas.” Paisley warned. “Maybe we can get a ride back with Santa!” Riley suggested, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “Wow, that would be

Jane “Daddy!” The sound of my pups’ frightened voices send me jerking upright in bed, suddenly and completely awake. I rush to their bedroom, flipping on the light and finding all four children piled on one bed, tears running down their cheeks. “Oh my loves, did you have nightmares?” I croon, immediately moving forward to comfort them They nod, but instead of running into my arms, they tighten their ranks. “Yes, but we don’t want you, we want Daddy!” Paisley cries. Pain slices through me, so powerfully it steals the breath from my lungs. I feel as though I’ve been punched in the stomach. No matter how bad things are between us, I’ve always been the one my pups turn to when they’re frightened or upset. “Well Daddy isn’t here.” I say shakily. “So you can have me, or nothing.” “T-then we ch-choose nothing.” Riley informs me through her sobs. I close my eyes so they can’t see me cry, nodding as my insides harden to stone. “Please don’t be that way. You know I love you, I don’t want

Jane If I thought I was angry before, it’s nothing compared to what I feel now. I’ve known maternal rage plenty of times since bringing the pups into the world, not the least of which was when Anita stole them from us and Aimon threatened their lives. Still, this mistreatment feels worse – because it’s not coming from some dark foe, but from the person who is supposed to love and protect them most – second only to me. The more I think about it, the more I believe that the betrayal of a parent is the worst transgression a pup can suffer, and I hate Ethan for abandoning our children. I want to storm back to the NightFang territory and beat him bloody – and the idea is so tempting I have to remind myself I have responsibilities here. I’m trying to get back into the swing of things at work, and I’m terribly behind on my La Louve duties. Not to mention that I’m devoting the weekends to trying to win over my heartbroken pups. They’ve barely spoken to me since I stopped them from goi