I sat in the flat my heart feeling like it was breaking. I should be back at the Midnight Forest Pack, at Gabriel’s home, getting to know my fated mate, yet instead I am having to accept the fact I have had to flee from my own fated mate when in truth I wanted nothing more than to be with him. All because of the messed up Alpha and pack we came from. I had never hated him more than I did right this moment. My wolf Kya had withdrawn into the nether areas of my mind right now, having thrown a serious tantrum at me earlier and was not happy with me for leaving our fated mate, but I had to follow pack orders, and had to do what I did. I could not stay with him, no matter how much I wanted to. I just hope that Lola had not allowed her mate to mark her either, she was not strong enough to cope with our Alpha and the consequences of going against his wishes. But ultimately, that was not my concern. She had to make her own choices, I had done what I needed to do, I had stuck to the ag

Wow, we have marked one another. It felt amazing. Manuel was so gentle and caring towards me. I have been truly blessed being fated with him. I really have. The sensation of marking each other was mind-blowing! It was almost like being drunk….. And now we were curled up in his bed in each others arms naked….. I think I have died and gone to heaven, I truly do…. I know it can’t and won’t last as there is shit to face up to now, but right now at this moment I am in heaven. I have the most perfect mate imaginable. My Mami and Papi were happy for me to mark him too, so that has to be a good thing, so I am hoping that means I get to be with him now. I have no intention of leaving him now. We have marked each other, we can’t leave each other now. Alpha can’t make us, can he? That is one thing I am terrified of. I know what our Alpha is like, he does not like being disobeyed, he runs the pack a certain way and I know that mating is not done without his permission. So I have al

I am in pieces, I didn’t realise just how difficult leaving Gabe would be. I did this to protect myself, my family and the arrangement we had with the pack which allowed me to come to university, but I did not consider the effect the mate bond would have and leaving my mate behind….. it was hurting me so badly….. Kya is on edge, she is skulking at the back of my mind, not happy at me for leaving her mate, the one she has been waiting so long for. If I was finding it this hard, I can’t even imagine what I have done to him, and I hate myself for that. He will know by now, and I imagine spoken to Lola to find out some information. I want to explain to him, but I stupidly didn’t even get his number. I will message Lola and ask her to get it for me. Though I don’t know that he will want to talk to me and who can blame him? My heart is in pieces. We need to find a way around this. I want him so badly. Being with him last night in the club, with his friends, felt so good, like I wa

I think we need to sort things out to try to speak to Esme, so I have got her number from Lola. Gabe has asked me that he does not speak with her, so I am wanting to talk to her to see if we can do anything as a pack, I do not want my friend to lose his mate, I do not like to see him struggling, yet if I am entirely honest, he seems to have given up hope already on ever being able to fix this. Surely there has to be a way. We can fix this. She seems to like him from what Lola had told us. I will see what she says when I speak to her in person too, before seeing what else I can decide. Then I am going to discuss things with my Dad, get his advice because I think I need his experience on this. Because how their pack is run has completely thrown me, I have never come across that before and it doesn’t seem normal, and it bothers me. It is not the way the werewolf council expects packs to be run, so I think we need to be reporting them. If my Dad agrees, then that is what I will

I stand looking at Lola, worried by what she has just said to me. It sounds like their pack has truly messed with her head. I thought my issues were over when she had let me mark her, but it seems I am going to have to help her reprogramme her way of thinking. I do not want her thinking she has to answer to me. I do not like that idea at all. My Mami never answered to my Dad, haha I’d like to have seen him make her try! They were equals, and that is how a couple should be, isn’t it? I hope the way I explained the relationship between Dan and Indie and Lilah and Knox will have helped Lola see we can be different to what she was expecting. We can be happy, we can be equal and work well. She should never feel she has to run around after me, bow down to me and try to please me. The thought of that actually hurts me. “What do you say, Carino? You think we can try?” I ask. “I don’t know if I am honest, Guapo. I need you to realise we were brought up as girls in pack to be tra