I. AM. ABSOLUTELY. FLOORED. This room is stunning. How did Megan get this party put together in so short a time? She should go into event planning. There are round tables all around the edges of the room. Each table has a black table cloth with decorative candle things in the middle. The centre of the room is clear to leave space for dancing and the DJ is set up at the far end of the room. There are servers running around setting up places at the tables and I can smell something amazing coming from somewhere nearby which is making me wish it was time to eat already. To one side of the room I can see large open doors which seem to lead outside. I can't see much but I know there are some fairy lights twinkling away out there. The opposite side of the room has several large tables pushed up against the wall. These are mostly empty but based on the few things I can see there, it's going to be where the food goes. Buffet style dinner it is, I can't wait. Megan and Tristan are still over wi

I- I cut off my own thought. This is not helpful right now. I take a deep breath and calm myself. I might even be almost relaxed when Bellamy finally finds me. Okay, that's not true. I'm completely freaking out. But I manage to hide it. Bellamy comes and sits on the seat beside me. He places my shoes on the ground by my feet and I slip them on. The silence is deafening until Bellamy finally manages to speak. His voice is quiet and almost completely void of expression, as is his face.“Are you mad at me again?” He asks. I shake my head. I don't know what I expected him to say but it wasn't that. “No.” He watches my face attentively.“But?” He waits for my reply. I stand up and move to look at a small water feature built into the wall. I keep my back to him.“But I can't do this right now.” I tell him. I keep my voice calm, but it's forced. I hear Bellamy stand and take a few steps until he's next to me. I don't turn to look at him.“What do you want?” His voice is a dull monotone.“I

Next time I check my phone it's basically flat so I plug it in to Megan's charger. It's after six in the evening.“I should probably get going soon.” I inform her with a frown. I'm enjoying myself, I don't particularly want to go home and sit around by myself. It leaves too much time for thinking. Megan grins at me.“You look like you'd rather stay.”“I would.” I admit. She shrugs.“So stay then. We can have a sleepover.” She is suddenly excited, her excitement is contagious.“I'd love to!” I bounce back onto her bed and she laughs as I almost fall off again. It takes a few minutes for her to calm down enough to be able to speak again.“So, I was wondering something...” I start. She nods for me to continue.“Tristan, I don't know a lot about him, and you don't really talk about him all that much. What's he like?” I am actually curious what he seems like to her, because to me he just seems creepy. Megan smiles.“He's perfect. He always says the right thing and we never fight or disagre

The next three months continue in this fashion. Megan and Darrien continue to visit me and I continue to live on autopilot. I lose weight because I can't seem to eat or sleep properly. I'm working more than ever. It helps to stay busy. It means less time staring at the wall. I still help Megan with wedding stuff but my enthusiasm is even more false than it was before. Still, the wedding plans continue to progress. Maggie messages me on multiple occasions inviting me to stop by. I make excuses every time. I haven't cried since that day and I don't intend to cry again. I haven't seen or heard from Bellamy either, although Megan and Darrien insist that he has been checking in with my guards regularly. That actually makes things worse. If he wants to talk to me all he has to do is call, or come see me. Instead he's spying on me from a distance getting reports from others. It only confirms that he has no interest in actually seeing me. Darrien suggested I should go see him. But if he is av

I'm not really watching, and I know that he is only watching to give me time to think. Time to sort through the rush of emotions I'm feeling. Can I really tell Megan the truth about her ties? Should I? From the very beginning that was my plan. I wrote her that note. It wasn't until I met her and became her friend that I began to worry she would resent my interference or choose Tristan over me. But didn't I promise myself I was going to be the best friend she ever had? Would a good friend really let her go through with this marriage? As for Bellamy... well, he does deserve the truth from me. The problem is I really don't know how to give it. What truth is it that he needs to hear? If I start at the wrong place he will probably run and avoid me, or it will turn into a fight. I can feel my heart rate increase at the thought of having to face Bellamy properly. I don't know if I'm ready yet. I take a deep breath to calm myself. I don't need to do anything right this second, I can take some