All Chapters of PLAYING THE PLAYER (M×M): Chapter 41

~ ALISTAIR ~I feel… weirdly calm.Not in the peaceful, zen kind of way. More like the numb kind. Like the part of me that’s usually screaming has finally shut up for a second, and now the silence is somehow louder.The mansion is cold when I step inside. Lights too white. Marble too clean. I walk in without a word, don’t even glance toward the lounge where I know he’s probably sitting with a drink and disappointment.He doesn’t say anything either.Good.I’m not sure what I’d do if he did. Maybe throw something or crumble.Instead, I take the stairs two at a time and head straight for my room. My hoodie still smells like sweat and regret and him, and my mouth still feels like him.God, Calvin.I touch my lips before I even realize I’m doing it, then yank my hand away like I caught fire. Which is ironic, because that’s what it felt like a couple hours ago—burning from the inside out.He touched me like I mattered.Held me like I wasn’t too much.And I let him.I don’t even know what t