Semua Bab Obsessive Lust: Bab 1 - Bab 10

The first thing I did was look at the strange ceiling with it's smooth, cream-colored, snd spotless look. The kind of ceiling one might see in luxury hotels or high-rise condominiums, worlds away from the peeling walls and buzzing bulbs I was accustomed to. Hanging from the ceiling was a chandelier, gently swaying, casting fine lines of gold light throughout the room. My head ached lightly, not from hurt, but from the weight of memory last night. The sheets felt so silky, and they smelled of lavender that is soothing, refined, utterly inappropriate for a person like me. I lay there, my fists knotted in the blanket as I glared at the ceiling, bewildered. I feel like my down part was ripped apart. It hurts so bad. A sigh slithered out of my mouth as I attempted to remember how I got where I was. Last night found me not in sequence, but piecemeal, like splinters of glass on the ground. Every memory shone in my head. Pieces of touch, voice, eyes gazing into me as if I were fragile and hi

The moment we exited the pizzeria, Camille insisted that we eat our leftovers with her, which were stuffed into a dirty box with a tight grip on her hand. I filled the silence with her babbling while my mind inside spun round and round, stuck in a vortex of doubt. My thoughts were boisterous, colliding into one another like waves during a tempest. Should I actually be doing this? Should I just turn back and never go back? Camille didn't appear to see the things brewing within me. Or perhaps she saw it but was allowing me to have my tantrum. "So, where's first?" she asked, still masticating the last slice of pizza with leisurely relish, as if we weren't likely to meet a man who had literally bought my silence. "Realtor said so to me on Sunday," I responded bluntly, glancing at the date on my phone. "So… not then." She elevated an eyebrow, one of her perfectly groomed ones. "Then?" I hesitated for a moment. "We're going straight to him." "Ooooh, still want to meet him huh," she

When we had finished eating, he simply leaned over and kissed me softly on the lips. It wasn't a hard or passionate one but one that impressed me in my mind. I made the conscious decision not to let him walk me home after because I knew Camille's response. As soon as she laid eyes on him, she would have stopped wondering. She would ask me questions about things that I didn't want to disclose, and she would notice that something was wrong. I told him that I did not want to go home immediately that evening. Instead, I was able to remain behind and escape her interrogation. On the ride, I sat restless. My mind was going into overdrive, leaping thoughts from one to the other. I kept debating whether I should tell Camille what actually transpired. Part of me wanted to tell him something, but another part told me to keep quiet. I had no idea how I felt. The point was, I didn't fight him... not that hard. I didn't push him away, and I didn't struggle against it. In a way, I let it happen b

I awoke due to the chill wind from the air conditioner and the faint scent of fresh linen. The room was recognizable, as if I was there in the past before. The ceiling above seemed just the same, dull and white with a tiny, flickering light. Something about the place awakened memories in, trivial things that I had forgotten up till then. My gaze swept the room, taking in the plain furnishings, the dresser, the tiny desk, the window with pulled-down blind shutters. And then it struck me: this was the identical room that I had slept in previously. I tensed my whole body as I sat up abruptly. A peculiar jittery sensation arose in me like the voice of alarm bells ringing in my head. I recalled then that this was the same hotel room where he made use of whenever our relationship started changing. That moment when the past turned, and I knew nothing would ever be like it was before. My heart pounded more fiercely as I was overwhelmed by a flood of old emotions and fears. It was the thou

“W-Why did you do that?” I managed to whisper, my voice trembling. I was completely stunned by what he just did, unable to find the right words. My mind was racing, trying to understand why he would act this way. I could feel my face flushing with embarrassment, and for a moment, I wished I could just disappear, vanish into thin air to escape the scene. My heart pounded so loudly I thought everyone nearby could hear it. The shock hit me so hard that even my breathing slowed down instinctively, as if I were trying to hide from everything around me. It’s not that this was our first kiss. We had shared moments before. But this time, he chose to do it in a way I never could have imagined. Not in a quiet, private setting, but out in the open, right where everyone could see. That public display caught me off guard in a way I couldn’t fully explain. I had expected him to act differently, maybe to ignore the attention or let me handle the humiliation on my own. I had pictured him enjoying hi