Messing with my head

NikolaiI don’t know what I was thinking, falling for such a sick and disgusting person like him.I loathe his whole existence.In fact, his existence in my basement should be an abomination itself.Pushing my hair backward, I sighed heavily, inhaling another smoke, which stung the back of my throat.“What the fuck are you looking at, huh?” I snapped angrily at Clinton.It had been days since my father freed me, which was still a shocker. The bastard had actually allowed me to walk out of that place alive in the first place.But he did anyway, and I already had a feeling that in exchange for my freedom, he would make me do something outrageous.Back to the two pairs of eyes that refused to fuck off me.Jeremy wasn’t even trying to hide his gaze as he calmly took a drag from the cigar and then spoke.“What exactly do you plan on doing with him, Niko? You can’t possibly have him locked in your basement forever.”“I can fucking do whatever the fuck I want, Jeremy, so fuck off.”And it ha

Harder

NathanielI’m freezing cold.I curled my body against the floor…Tired, drained, confused, and having a mental breakdown wasn’t helping either.I didn’t know how many days had passed…. Two? Three? Four? A week?Probably more than two days, because I could already feel my body going into survival mode, breaking down whatever it needed to keep me alive.My mind was a chaotic, fractured blur.Spinning in circles.Until I couldn’t tell what was real anymore.Why did I do it?Why did I think I could play with fire and not get burned?I questioned every single decision that brought me to this cold floor. The contract. Reina. The money. Everything.The horror of Nikolai’s words about my brother clawed at my chest. But through the suffocating guilt, a devastating truth finally broke through.“I love you…” I croaked into the empty darkness.The words tore from my throat like broken glass.I didn’t say them out loud to win him back. I said them because they were killing me. I loved him. I loved

Absolute Madness

NathanielMy vision blurred more with tears.His grip on my neck tightened, his face fucking close to mine.The anger…The hurt…Everything reflected in his eyes was so fucking much, so damn cold.“Can’t fucking speak, huh? Fucking tell me you love me.”I shook my head…“Tell me you fucking love me! Fucking say it! Tell me!!!!”My lack of response only amplified his anger.“Say you love me….”“Stop……” I choked.At that moment, he seemed to have lost every shred of rationality.He slammed his lips against mine, aggressively snatching my breath away while his fingers dug into my skin.There was nothing romantic about the kiss.It reeked of pain.A reflection of how broken we are.A reminder of what could have become of us.But I ruined it.I writhed desperately as he bruised my lips with his while forcing his body onto mine.I couldn’t breathe…I gasped harshly as tears burned and kept clogging my throat.“I…. I….” Weakly, I tried pushing him away.He grabbed my face. “I fucking hate yo

Euphoric Pain

NikolaiEvery thrust felt like a confession.A confession of how badly he had broken me.“I hate you.”“I fucking hate you.” I squeezed our hands together, crushing my weight into his back as I moved through him.He felt so good.So good that I hated to admit it.To admit that he still had some fucking control over me.Increasing my pace as I swelled around him, his muffled voice acted like a damn amplifier.“Hmmm…” he groaned, trembling beneath me.I was burning, drowning in the scent of him, the taste of his betrayal heavy in my mouth. I wanted to destroy him. I wanted to tear him apart until he felt the exact same hollow, bleeding vacuum he had left in my chest.But as I drove deep inside him, hearing his muffled, agonizing screams against the floorboards, the anger didn’t satisfy me.It only made the wound wider.His fingers were locked in mine, trembling, fighting for purchase against the wood. He wasn’t pushing me away anymore. He was holding onto me, like I was his only anchor

End of a toxic beginning

NathanielI felt him trembling hard… with him still very much inside me.Our eyes locked completely on each other.“I fucking hate you,” he spat before abruptly pulling out.Another sharp, brutal groan erupted from my throat.The sudden empty space he left behind burned.It was a cold, searing ache that ripped through my hollowed-out insides.I collapsed forward, my forehead hitting the floorboards with a dull thud. My limbs were like lead, heavy and useless, and my breath hitched in jagged, agonizing intervals.“Niko…” I gasped, the name catching on a sob I couldn’t suppress.I heard him stumble.The sound of his heavy, uneven breathing filled the room, jagged and loud.I managed to push myself up slightly, every muscle in my body screaming.I still felt every inch of him inside me.It was fresh, and throbbing badly too.I thought he was just going to leave—He was pacing around, running his fingers through his hair.“Nikolai….” His name rolled off my tongue.He stopped pacing.His b

Dumb fuck

NathanielA week laterBreathing hard.With my heart literally pounding against the walls of my throat.I blinked continuously, hoping the sick, twisted nervousness in my stomach would just die down.It didn’t.Slowly I lifted my hand, placing a soft knock on the door.And almost immediately a reply came through.Another harsh swallow, I pushed the door open, stepping in.Professor Leo lifted his gaze at me, momentarily, and for a second there…. I couldn’t read his expression.Was he disappointed?Ashamed on my behalf?Probably disgusted.Disgusted by the fact that one of his best students turned out to be a motherfucking bastard.His gaze angled back to his laptop, as he murmured.“Take a seat, Mr. Lockwood.”Again, I forced the hardness down my throat.About five minutes passed, and finally he slowly closed his laptop, removed his glasses, and then leaned completely against the chair.“Your attendance is a total disaster, Nathaniel.”Professor Leo’s voice was flat. Cold.“Two weeks