The Funeral

The church is small and old with wooden pews that creak when you sit down and stained glass windows that cast colored light across the floor in shades of blue and gold.It’s fuller than I expected. People packed into every available seat, some standing along the back wall. Catherine was loved by more people than just her sons.I’m sitting in the front row beside Jeremy with Jamel on his other side, and Jeremy hasn’t said a word since we got here, just sits with his hands folded in his lap and his eyes fixed straight ahead on the simple wooden casket at the front of the room.There are flowers everywhere, arrangements sent by people who knew Catherine or heard about her passing, and the smell of lilies is so strong it makes my stomach turn a little.At the front of the church beside the casket there’s a large framed photograph of Catherine, and it must be from years ago because she looks so different from the frail woman I met in the hospital. In this picture she’s smiling wide, her e

I Know that Voice

He stands behind the podium and looks out at everyone gathered there, and for a long moment he doesn’t say anything, just stands there with his jaw working like he’s trying to find the words.Finally he speaks and his voice is rough but steady.“When I was a kid I used to draw my mom every single day,” he says. “I’d sit at the kitchen table with my crayons and my paper and I’d draw her over and over, and she’d look at every single one like it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, even when it was just stick figures that barely looked like anything.”A few people in the congregation laugh softly through their tears.“She made me feel like I could do anything,” Jeremy continues, and now his voice is starting to shake. “Like I was enough, like I mattered, even when I didn’t believe it myself, she never stopped believing in me.”He pauses and looks at the casket, stares at it for a long moment.“I wasn’t ready to lose her,” he says quietly. “I don’t think I’ll ever be ready.”The

He’s Here

The second I see Ryan standing there in Catherine’s living room with his arms around Jeremy, every instinct in my body screams at me to move.I turn and push through the crowd of people holding paper plates and plastic cups, keeping my head down, moving as fast as I can without running because running would draw attention and attention is the last thing I need right now.My pulse is loud in my ears and I can feel sweat starting to form along my hairline despite the cool air coming through the open windows.I slip past a group of older women talking near the hallway entrance and duck into the first room I find, Catherine’s bedroom, pressing myself against the wall beside the door where I have a clear view of the living room through the narrow opening.Ryan’s still there talking to Jeremy and Jamel, his mouth moving as he gestures with one hand, and beside him is his mother, shorter than I remember with her dark hair pulled back in a neat bun, wearing a black dress and speaking quietly

All Chapters of What We Kept In The Dark: Chapter 31 - Chapter 33

The Funeral

I Know that Voice

He’s Here