Semua Bab The Things We Don't Say: Bab 41 - Bab 50

It felt like I had been caught doing something wrong; like we had been caught doing something wrong. I pulled away from Marcus the minute I heard the back door slam open, seconds before Joshua’s loud laughter reached us.The water strangely felt colder than it usually was, from where I leaned over, pulling myself out of the pool. I didn’t look back, because honestly, I didn’t know if I should, if I wanted to.Okay. That was a lie. Every inch of me wanted to. I needed to see Marcus’ face, to check if he was as confused as I was, or whether he would laugh this strangeness off. For a split second, just before my cousin came in, I could have sworn that we would have…that it felt…No, Jordan. I shook my head as if to get rid of the thoughts. You can’t even think that way. It was … It was nothing. Nothing happened. Yet, I felt every bit of the warm breath that caressed my face inside the water, the way he’d looked at me, drawn closer like he couldn’t help it. The way I couldn’t help it.“H

She was standing in my bedroom, her hands on her hips and her hair all over the place. There was a white sheet on her face. A facial mask. But despite the covering, I could tell that she was mad all over.And maybe a tad curious.I landed carefully into the bedroom, closing the blinds behind me.“Answer me right this minute, Marcus, before I go down the hallway and tell your parents that you were not studying like I claimed you were.”"You lied for me?" My eyes shone wide open and a smile broke out on my face. "You are a lifesaver, Anna."I tried to pull her into my arms, but she danced right away from me. "I'm listening. Where were you? Because what you don't get to do is leave me in the middle of a hot conversation and leave me to God knows where. And please, let it not be what I am thinking. Because if it is…"“It is,” I breathed, throwing myself into my carefully made bed. “I was with Jordan.”“What? Are you insane? How many times do you want me to tell you that he isn’t your…”"H

I was gone for only thirty minutes, but by the time I returned, James was nowhere to be found, and Anna had had her fill of staying alone at the stand. Because the minute I jumped out of the car with my mom, she was off, waving at me from above her head.“I guess it’s just us then,” I sighed, moving to the spot behind the displayed products. “So much for letting Gary get away with work for today.”“You both have been bickering a lot since you returned,” my mom murmured, coming to join me. “Something I should know about?”“Come on, Mom. Gary and I have always bickered since we were kids. And it doesn’t help that I’m gay and he’s homophobic.”I expected it. The way she looked away sharply, before bringing her eyes back to me. But no matter how frequently it happened, it still managed to hurt me. And as usual, my mom ignored the part about me being gay.“You both need to find a way to make up. He’s your brother.”"Maybe we will make up when you stop letting him have so much freedom."“Ma

I jerked awake suddenly, sitting up in the darkness of my room. My head looked around slowly, the first few seconds very fuzzy. When I lay back under my covers, it occurred to me that something had woken me up.And then, I heard it again. The loud banging on the door. My hand reached for the digital clock by my bedside. It wasn't that late. A little past 11. But I wasn't expecting anyone. The only other person who was here with me was Joshua, and he never came back this early.Yeah. For people like Joshua and me, this was pretty early.When the knock sounded again, this time more insistent, I groaned and dragged myself out of bed, not bothering to throw on a shirt over my bare chest. With my lounge pants hanging low on my hips, I sauntered out of my bedroom, rubbing my eyes and wishing whoever it was would just go away.But it had to be important because only someone who had the code could come into JAR in the middle of the night. I had three guesses. One, Joshua had misplaced his k

The ride back was the most silent I had ever been with Jordan. The beer left a funny feeling in my stomach, but I was fine. What was worse was the fact that I had said what I said.I shouldn’t have. I tried to stop myself, to think about something else. But it came out, and there was nothing I could do or say to take it back. I felt like a fool when he didn’t respond. He must have felt accosted.I would have felt the same way if I were in his shoes.Jordan didn't go to his house. Instead, he went further, keeping his gaze on the road until we were in front of my house. The lights were off on the porch, a single light shining through the living room.He killed the engine and turned to look at me. “Marcus…”“Jordan…”I laughed awkwardly. “You first.”“Nah,” he murmured, shaking his head. “I want to hear you first.”I had a whole speech planned inside my head, but now, staring at him, I wasn't sure if he exactly wanted to hear what I had to say. Again, the difference between us couldn't