Home / I Was the Child They Never Loved / Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

All Chapters of I Was the Child They Never Loved: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

12 Chapters

Chapter 1

My sister, Hannah Hayward, only mentioned that she had a bit of a fever, and the whole family sprang into action.Dad grabbed his car keys and headed for the door. "I'll get the car. We're going to the hospital right now."My brother, Drew Hayward, pulled out his phone to look up nearby hospitals. "I'll register at the ER so we don't have to wait in line when we get there."Hannah stood in the middle of all of them with a sheepish little smile. "It's just a mild fever. You really don't have to make such a big deal out of it."Mom had already pulled a jacket out of the closet and draped it over Hannah's shoulders herself, her voice impossibly soft. "Sweetheart, a fever is nothing to mess around with. If you keep putting it off, it could do real damage."Drew jumped in. "Come on, just let us take you. We'll all feel better once a doctor checks you out."I stood off to the side, like I was watching through a pane of glass.So, they knew all along that fevers necessitated the hospit

Chapter 2

The year Drew got into college, Dad rewarded him with a brand-new laptop. When Hannah placed first in her grade in elementary school, Mom took her to an amusement park and bought her an expensive dress.I had won things too, back then. I placed second in an essay competition, got top marks on my piano exam, and finished in the top ten in my whole school on my entrance exams.But no matter what I brought home, all my parents ever did was nod and say, "Not bad," or "Don't let it go to your head."I always thought it meant I wasn't good enough yet, that I had to come in first, had to be the best, before I deserved even a word of praise.But now, I understood. Hannah could earn a reward just by going to the hospital. She didn't need to beat anyone or prove anything. All she had to do was say she felt bad, and everyone rushed to comfort her.It wasn't that I wasn't good enough. I just wasn't loved enough.The thought hit me like a bucket of ice water. I didn't want to watch anymore. E

Chapter 3

I ended up in the kitchen anyway.I set a pot of soup on the stove and turned on the burner. I stood there watching it heat up, the steam stinging my eyes until they burned, and I thought about my junior year of high school.My stomach had cramped so badly I couldn't stand up straight. I called Mom, and she told me to stop being dramatic. She said if I just toughed it out, it would pass.I went to the school nurse by myself, and when the nurse asked where my parents were, I told her they were busy. They weren't busy. They just didn't want to come.The soup slowly filled the kitchen with a warm smell. The kettle was on beside it, heating water for tea.I leaned against the kitchen doorframe and pulled out my phone to check the time, but the first thing I saw was Mom's latest post on her feed.The photo was taken in the hospital hallway. Hannah was leaning against Drew's shoulder with a cooling strip on her forehead. Mom had captioned it, "When your baby gets sick, a mother's heart

Chapter 4

"Drew bought it for me," Hannah said. Then, she pulled a stack of cash out of her bag and told me with a beaming smile, "Mom also gave me 1,300 dollars as a reward for being so brave about my shot today."The number—1,300 dollars—drove into me like a nail. I looked up and stared hard at Mom. "Did you take the money in my drawer?"The living room went dead quiet. The smile on Mom's face stiffened for a second, and she instinctively looked away from me. At that moment, I already knew the answer.My drawer had always been locked, and nobody knew where I kept the key except her. She was the only one who could have taken it.I didn't look away. "Did you take it?"Mom reacted like I had hit a nerve, her voice going sharp. "Look at you, Claire, all grown up now. Your family just walked in the door, and the first thing you do is interrogate your own mother like she's some kind of thief?"She didn't explain where the money came from. She just doubled down on me being difficult.Hannah's

Chapter 5

I stared at the envelope, my throat tight. "So you're admitting the money was mine?"Dad frowned. "Now's not the time for that. I'll give you the money, but you need to go out there and apologize to your mother and Hannah."I froze. The faint trace of warmth I had just felt turned ice cold in an instant."I'm the one who has to apologize?"My question only made his expression worse. "Who else? This whole mess is because of you. Your mother hasn't been able to eat for days because of how upset she is, and Hannah keeps crying and saying she never should have accepted the reward."Would it kill you to make this easy? Just go out there, say something nice, and apologize, and we can all move on."My fingers went numb from how hard I was clenching them. "It was my money that was taken. Why should I be the one apologizing?"Dad let out a sigh and looked at me like I was the biggest disappointment of his life. "Claire, what happened to you? What matters more, money or this family being

Chapter 6

"Claire's gone!" Mom yelled.Drew walked over with a frown. "Where could she have gone? She probably just took off somewhere to sulk."Dad's expression was grim. "Call her."Mom dialed my number right away, but all she got was an automated message telling her the phone was switched off. She gripped her phone, her voice tight. "It's off."Drew scoffed. "She did it on purpose. She wants us to worry. She's been like this her whole life, always scheming."Dad didn't say anything. He walked into my room, and his eyes landed on the desk. Sitting on the corner was a printed bus ticket confirmation to Alderton.Mom went rigid the second she read it. "She actually left? She still has a fever. How can she just leave on her own?"Drew's first instinct was to say I deserved it, but the words died on his lips. Because there, on the desk, was also a box of fever medicine with only two pills missing, and next to it was an unopened tube of burn ointment.Mom stared at the ointment, and it came

Chapter 7

"Hey, are you okay?" The woman asked.I opened my mouth, but my throat was so raw that nothing came out. She glanced at the college pin on my backpack, then at my flushed face. "Do you go to Alderton University?"I nodded, and she said right away, "Me too. Let me take you to the campus clinic."My first instinct was to say no. I had spent my whole life learning not to be a burden to anyone. But at that moment, I couldn't hold myself up anymore, so I whispered, "Thank you."It was the first time I realized that asking for help wasn't something to be ashamed of. What was shameful was needing it and being turned away, over and over, by the people closest to me.The on-call doctor at the campus clinic took my temperature, and it was 102.6°F. He frowned and asked, "It's already this high, and you're only coming in now?"I was quiet for a moment. "I was at home before."He looked at me but didn't push it. He prescribed me medication and treated the burn on my hand. "Keep this dry fo

Chapter 8

Faye also helped me change all my payment passwords."Claire, don't keep money at home from now on," she said. "Keep your safety net where only you can reach it."I nodded.That night, I sat on my dorm bed and looked at the balance on my new card. There wasn't much, but for the first time, I wasn't afraid.I had the school, I had my professors, and I had two working hands and a functioning brain. I wasn't going to starve, and I was never going to be trapped in that house again.On the third day, Mom finally called from a different number. I picked up.The moment the line connected, she started crying. "Claire, how could you be so heartless? You just left without a word. I haven't been able to sleep for days."I listened to her cry, and I felt nothing. If this had happened before, I would have panicked, felt guilty, and apologized on the spot.But now, all I replied was, "When are you giving me my money back?"The other end went quiet for a second. The crying stopped. When Mom

Chapter 9

Below that was the record from my appendicitis surgery. The line for the family member's signature had my own name on it, because no family member had shown up that day. The doctor had eventually let me sign the risk disclosure myself.I still remembered that day. I was lying on the gurney, drenched in sweat from the pain, and the nurse asked me, "Where are your parents, sweetheart?"I told her, "They're on their way."But by the time the anesthesia went in, they still hadn't come. When I woke up, the first thing I saw was the ceiling. The second thing I saw was a 200-dollar transfer on my phone. Mom's message read, "Buy yourself something nutritious."I had made excuses for her at the time. She was busy with work, and the drive was long. Plus, someone had to stay home. Looking back on it now, I couldn't believe how naive I had been.Hannah texted again."Mom's crying, Dad hasn't said a word, and Drew locked himself in his room."I didn't reply.A long time later, Drew called.

Chapter 10

Mom finally seemed to accept it, as if she had been forced to say it out loud. "Claire Bear, I wasn't thinking that day. I've always thought of you as the responsible one. Hannah had just finished her exams and was sick on top of it, and I just..."She couldn't finish, so I finished for her, "You just figured my money was there for the taking and that I wouldn't fight back."Mom's face went white. "That's not it. I just got used to it. I got used to you handling everything on your own, never crying, never making a fuss, and always being more mature than Hannah."I nodded. "So now that I'm not being mature anymore, you're not used to it. That makes sense."Dad frowned. "Claire, your mother already knows she was wrong. We came all this way because we genuinely want to make things right. You can't keep holding on to the past."The second those words left his mouth, I knew. Their regret was real, but so was their sense of entitlement. They wanted to make amends, but what they wanted e

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