Torn

Torn

By:  Ashleigh Smith  Ongoing
Language: English
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Slowly his hands glide up from my hips, up my back to the base of my hairline tilting my head down so that our foreheads touch. His eyes are closed and his breath is just as ragged at mine. “What on earth was that?” I ask “The best damn kiss of my life. Worth waiting almost 3 years to kiss you like that” My cheeks flush red at the comment. We have kissed a handful of times over the years. Usually instigated in a moment of weakness by Dimetrius but never anything like that. That kiss was dripping with desire from both sides. It definitely wasn’t one sided, I could feel what that kiss did to him through the hard length pressing against the inside of my thigh through his pants. I figured, why not throw it all at the wind and take a chance. I maintain eye contact with him as I slowly run my hands down the front of his chest, his eyes don’t leave mine as he sits dangerously still. I bring my hands back up his body again as I wrap my arms around the back of his neck. I adjust myself on his lap, so that now im sitting directly on top of his hard length and lean down to kiss him stopping just short with a smirk on my face. “Amelia” he says my name almost like a warning. That if I push him too far he is scared that he wont be able to stop. Once those flood gates are open, will either of us be strong enough to close them. I’m risking everything in this moment. I’m risking any future with Abran, and I’m risking my friendship with my best friend I am currently straddling. Fuck it

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13 chapters
Chapter One
A whirlwind of emotions begins to run through my head, memories, visions, thoughts I had spent so long trying to block out. All those years of forcibly locking them into a closet and throwing away the key, pointless. He found me again, and walked so superior like always towards me. It was like he floated along the ground, his feet barely touching it. Stop, don’t think like that. We worked too hard to get to where we are to let him waltz back in and change everything all over again.I blinked with surprise, surely after all these years this wouldn’t be the response I would really have to seeing the man I had been in love with for so long. Again, the memories rushed back into my mind. I knew I was going to have to face it eventually, but not now. Not while he stood in front of me, that’s too hard. I could see his mouth begin to open; I was going to have to hear his enthralling voice again. I imagined how it would ring between my ears, like a sonnet being played in a beautiful amphithea
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Chapter Two
I awoke as the sun came in across my face, I must have fallen asleep. I stood up and my back ached. What I get for sleeping on the floor. The fire had burnt out but the warmth still lingered throughout the house. I wandered around the house, I took my morning shower and gathered my things into my pack for the day. As I opened the front door to grab my boots the chill of the wind knocked the air from my lungs. I gasped and grabbed my boots before slamming the door again. I dropped my boots and walked down to my room. I took out a coat, blouse and a pair of trousers. Pulling my dress off and dropping it on the ground I picked up the blouse and trousers and pulled them on. I wrapped the coat around me as I walked back to the door. After putting my boots on I braced myself again as I opened the door. The breeze didn’t seem to penetrate as deeply this time and I swung the pack over my shoulder and closed the door behind me. The walk up to the tower wasn’t too bad. The wind was dying down
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Chapter Three
The days of my life began to trickle into one after that day. I couldn’t tell where one day ended and the other started. My mind was plagued with his memories, after Dimetrius told me they were preparing to have me married I could only think of how he would react. Everywhere I went something or someone reminded me of him. One day I wandered out past the city gates and down a soft dirt track. The farms were up ahead of me, so I walked a little quicker. I took comfort in the amount of people or things that allow me to stay within reality. I continued to wander down the road, slowly the dirt track morphed more into just a track leading across some hills and towards the black forest. Although usually a scary place to be, something drew me towards to the dark and dreary place. I pushed on through following the path that was slowly diminishing into pressed down grass that probably hasn’t been disturbed in years. I trailed my hands over the low shrubbery as I walked further into the darkne
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Chapter Four
“Oh, Amelia. What a pleasant surprise” “I could say the same” I stood up slowly, not wanting the wine to rush to my head and curtsied politely. Alessandra began to smile in a way that made me wonder if the both of us being here was really a coincidence. “Take a seat Abran, ill grab you a bowl of stew and a goblet. I’m sure you two have plenty to catch up on” She turned and disappeared into the kitchen. I pointed out a spare seat and then sat myself back down and continued eating without saying a word. A few minutes had passed, I began to ponder on the thought of whether Alessandra really needed to take that long. I looked up and noticed Abran watching me, when he realized I had noticed. He smiled. “How has your week been Amelia?” He has put my mind through torture for the last week and he wants to know how it feels? “It has been fine, uneventful” I lied. He nodded his head, “Everything fine back home? Your commander hasn’t given you too much trouble has he?” I sighed, “I was
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Chapter Five
A week had past, I hadn’t left the city. I'd become a zombie in my own skin. I wasn’t even leaving my house the last two days. I walked towards the door, just to look outside and I noticed an envelope that had been slipped under my door. I reached down to pick it up and immediately recognized Abran’s handwriting on the front.Amelia,I knew this wouldn’t be easy, but I had no idea the city would make it this hard. I am totally confused about the issue with Duane, why didn’t you say anything? I haven’t seen you leave the city walls all week, I found out that they have you locked in the city somewhere. I am so sorry.The day in the field was not what I had expected at all. I didn’t want to fight anyone, but Duane had left me with no choice. I did try to pick you up from the ground when everyone just left you there. Unfortunately Davina saw what I was going to do and got to you first. I didn’t lie to you when I told you I still care about you and I always will. I will wait for you Amelia
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Chapter Six
The bed I was laying in felt soft, I sunk in amongst the pillows. I wasn’t in my new dress anymore, I had been changed into my nightgown. I reached for my head. It was still wrapped and extremely sore. I opened my eyes slowly and tried to focus. I was in a large room, it was very bleak. The aromas didn’t seem familiar, but at least it wasn’t as stale as the hospital,“Good morning”I turned my head to the voice, Duane was by my side. I looked down and noticed he was holding my hand, there was a ring on it. I looked back up at him.“Your probably confused. We are at my house. Everything you will need is here. I went and got as few things for you from your house, I hope you don’t mind. It was just some clothes, your pillow and blanket. I thought you would feel more comfortable if you had your own.”I froze, my pillow! Had he found the letter? I tilted my head as far backwards and to the side as I could, then lifted my free hand up beside my face. As I pushed down I didn’t hear the paper
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Chapter Seven
“It won’t take them long to come back with more men once they here I have slain their Master of War Amelia”I nodded my head, “We should find somewhere safe, until it dies down for a while.”“I know the place, it won’t be easy getting you there but it’s the safest area I know” He took hold of my hand and we quickly walked down the stairs.“Should we really just leave him there?”He chuckled, “Ah, that is why I love you Amelia. First the man tries to kill you, now he is dead and you are worried about his welfare?” He kissed my forehead and we continued walking.I guess it was a little funny. We were walking so fast he was dragging me along behind him.“Come on, we need to be quicker. There is a lot more of them then there is of us. If we don’t get to the hiding place before they get to Cuyle’s body we will be in a lot of trouble”He stopped dead in his tracks and grabbed hold of my arms. In one swift manoeuvre he flung me onto his back.“Surely this isn’t quicker? My weight alone would
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Chapter Eight
“Well that opening in the roof meant I didn’t have to negate my way around your front door guards”I looked past him towards the door.“Don’t do anything stupid Amelia. I have come on peaceful terms. Let’s not change that”I nodded slowly, still not moving from the corner.“You slain my Master of War Amelia. You made us look like a bunch of fools. You have thrown everything Duane did for you back in his face. You crushed the heart of Dimetrius. I personally am willingly to look past all that. I will remove your enemy status”“At what cost?”“You returning to Rircaex, as a slave for a year. Then you will return back to your regular status again. Its not that much of a sacrifice if you think about it. We are down an army commander because of your actions”“What about Abran?”“What about him?”“If I return to Rircaex I will not be able to see him will I? And I would still have to marry Duane?”He nodded his head, “Abran is a city enemy Amelia, he has slain many of our guards in the past.
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Chapter Nine
“Amelia? Please say something. I had every intention to tell you about this before you made any life decisions but you were unhappy and Cuyle pushed up the timeline”I just continue to lay there, blinking my eyes but not saying a word. I'm trying so hard to understand what he has just told me. He had a child, with his ex-lover. He actually slept with someone else during one of our separations. I mean, the idea had crossed my mind that it was possible, but even when Dimetrius proposed to me, we had never been intimate. Not when I still hadn’t completely closed the door here with Abran. That wouldn’t have been fair to either of them.“Amelia?” I flinch subconsciously as he reaches out in an attempt to either comfort me or snap me from my mental jail.“I, um, how old is he? What is his name?”“He is almost 2, we called him Isiah” I can feel his gaze on me, his breaths are rapid and his heart is racing. He has absolutely no idea how I am going to react, and if I'm honest neither do i.“I
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Chapter Ten
I groan as I open my eyes, the blinds in this Tavern are basically useless and the room is bathed in sunlight. Dimetrius is somehow still out cold beside me, snoring away. We have slept beside each other plenty of times before. Nothing has ever happened, but after sharing that memory with me last night. Something stirred deep down in my core, now it feels different waking with him beside me. I slowly peel myself out of the bed and walk quietly over to the bathroom shutting the door behind me. I turn on the shower and peel off my clothes before stepping in under the warm stream of water. I’m careful to still not get my hair wet. After my body feels clean and slowly stops aching I step out of the shower and glance around the bathroom. It suddenly becomes incredibly clear, that I didn’t bring a towel in with me.I sigh as I walk towards the bathroom door and crack it just slightly. I can see Dimetrius still sleeping on the bed and the two towels on top of the table beside it. I carefully
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