What Are Funny Graduation Quotes Short For A Light-Hearted Speech?

A month before the SATs, I, Jenny Reid, could see my score. Literally. It was just floating right above my head. But there was a catch. Every time I cracked open a prep book, my score would drop by ten points. But if I skipped a day of school? It jumped right back up by ten. So, I played the system. For a whole month, I barely lifted a finger. And on the day of the test, the number glowing over my head was a solid 1560. When the scores finally dropped online… I'd scored a 500. And the 1560? That was my little sister Patricia's score. My parents lost it. As punishment, they got me a grueling night-shift job at a local electronics factory. That first night, a bunch of guys I'd never seen before cornered me in the parking lot and beat me half to death. Fading in and out of consciousness, I heard my sister's voice right by my ear. "You just had to one-up me, didn't you? Thought you were so smart… but you never figured out I was the one controlling that number over your head." The truth hit me like a physical blow. The score had been her trick all along. I opened my eyes—and I was back. One month before the SATs. The number above my head read exactly 1300. "Hey," my sister said, all fake sweetness. "Want to study together tonight? We can go over the practice tests." I looked at the stack of papers in my own hands. Without a word, I pulled out my lighter and set them on fire right there in the driveway. "Exams are coming," I said, watching the flames. "I'm not studying." My score ticked up to 1310. My sister's face was this perfect mask of disappointment, but the second I turned away, I caught the sly smile she couldn't quite hide. She had no idea… the real performance, the one I'd been rehearsing just for her, was finally about to begin.

On the day we take our graduation photos, Mom and Dad hold up their cameras, snapping countless pictures of my boyfriend and my best friend. In the viewfinder, the two of them lean in close while my parents watch on with proud, beaming smiles, despite my being their biological daughter and the girl Gavin has been dating for the last four years. I stand off in the corner, clad in my cap and gown, waiting for what feels like an eternity, but Mom never once beckons me over to join them. Once Charlotte finishes her photoshoot, she mentions that she still hasn't lined up a decent job yet. Gavin completely forgets I'm even there and instantly leans in to comfort her. "Why don't you come work at the company I just joined? That way, I can look out for you." Dad nods right along in agreement. "Send me a copy of your resume, Lottie. I'll ask around for you. You shouldn't have to settle, especially when it's your first real job." Nolan walks over carrying a bottle of ice water, but he passes it to Charlotte. "Don't sweat the job hunt, Lottie," he says. "My company's hiring. I'll get you an internal referral." It's only when they catch sight of my hand freezing midair that everyone finally remembers that I'm standing right next to them. "Natalie, you should just find a random job and get on with it," Nolan says. Mom chimes in, "Exactly. You didn't major in anything special, so you should be grateful if a company even wants you. Stop being so picky." As Gavin scrolls through the gallery on his phone, his brow suddenly furrows into a frown. "Natalie's blocking Lottie in this one. I'm deleting it." But out of nearly 400 pictures, that's the only one where I exist. I stand off to the side, my hands tightening into fists. It turns out it isn't a matter of them failing to see me. They see me perfectly fine. They just think I'm a nuisance. It's as if Charlotte is their actual daughter, and my boyfriend belongs right by her side. If that's how it's going to be, then I'm taking the job farthest away from home, and I'm never coming back.

Senior Year. Oh the joy of being a senior. Even though they have been seniors for a year and some months, they are still yet to discover that its not that easy. Trying to balance school life with personal life is not as easy as it seems. Especially now that they have been burdened with the school responsibilities and some have begun facing some huge family issues. Dive into the world of a group of struggling teenagers, filled with romance, drama, heartbreak, tragedy and betrayal.

After taking our graduation photo, I break up with Philip Lutz. "You're doing this just because I stood behind Mandy and not you while we were taking our graduation photos?" he asks. "Yes," I merely reply. "Sure," he says with a smile. "You'd better not come crying to me or begging for us to get back together later." Having known each other for ten years and dated for four, Philip is certain that I'll never leave him. However, he's unaware that the graduation photos are just an excuse. If I'm capable of taking my graduation photos alone, I can walk my future path alone. Once I've gone abroad, the sky's the limit for me. I no longer need him to stand behind me either.

I’ve always taken people literally. When Dad told me to empty the basin, I asked where he wanted me to pour the water. “On my head,” he snapped. So I did. When Mom told me to do the laundry, I asked whether I should add detergent. She gave a cold laugh. “Sure. Add caramel sauce.” So I poured an entire bottle of caramel sauce into the washing machine. Everyone said I was stupid. But this “stupid” guy took first place in a nationwide academic competition. I earned my school’s only direct-admission spot at one of the country’s top universities. The day the results were announced, Lucas Hale, the school bully, ripped my application apart in front of the entire class. “You can’t even understand sarcasm. Why should someone like you get direct admission? “Last night, I saw you get out of a luxury SUV. Who knows what kind of deal you made with the woman inside?” The whole classroom went quiet. Then everyone started looking at me differently. Lucas stood there with a self-righteous expression. “I’m just speaking up for the rest of the class. Why should we work ourselves to death only to lose out to someone who got in through connections?” I thought about it seriously. Then I took out my phone and called my older sister. “Claire, they said I got my admission spot by sleeping with someone. Is that true?” A few seconds later, I held the phone out to Lucas, whose face had gone pale. “My sister wants to know something.” “What’s your name?” “And your student ID number?”

I've just left the washroom when Vanessa Shallow, who has just returned from her maternity leave, covers her mouth as she laughs at me. "Wow, you really are quick when it comes to bathroom breaks, huh? No wonder your sales performance is increasing by leaps and bounds! I suppose it's all thanks to your ability to take off your pants very quickly!" Vanessa acts as though she's joking as she starts making faces at the male colleagues around us. "Right, I forgot how prideful young ladies are nowadays! They can't seem to accept such truths when spoken in such a blunt manner!" The colleagues burst out laughing in a lecherous way afterward. Their perverted gazes keep clinging to my legs the whole time. As I stare at Vanessa's slightly bloated face, my gaze grows cold. It seems that she's so anxious to get her position as the project leader back that she's willing to shed even her sense of shame and propriety. I take a step forward and speak up. "I'm not as skilled as you are when it comes to such things, Vanessa. After all, not everyone is capable of making Mr. Studdard visit their home every midnight during their maternity leave." As soon as my words fall, the previously rowdy office goes deathly silent.