Extremely Funny Poems

Six years ago, she saved his life. And for six years he had searched desperately for her, but it was as if she had vanished from the face of the earth. Just as he was about to suspect that it was all a dream, she unexpectedly walked up to him and said, "I am Andrea Aguero, your fiancée." *** Andrea Aguero, the world-famous mysterious doctor, went on a journey alone, carrying a souvenir, to fulfill her grandmother's last wish by finding her arranged fiancé. Deep down, she secretly hoped the man would reject her. But when she actually meets him, things get out of hand! *** Andrea swallowed and looked up at Sebastian, then asked, "Mr. Munoz? Will you marry me?" She was still anticipating the man's rejection. "What if I'm not interested?" Inwardly ecstatic, Andrea managed to maintain a calm exterior and said, "That is my grandmother's intention, but if you are not willing, I will not force you to marry me.I will return the pendant to you and the marriage contract will be null and void." The words were spoken with great politeness - excellent, mission accomplished! But suddenly Sebastian moved closer to her, a small smile playing on his lips. "But... my family is extremely strict about integrity, and since my grandfather has already made this deal, it would be disrespectful for me to refuse, and my refusal would make it appear that my family doesn't keep its word." This statement immediately put Andrea on high alert, her eyebrows furrowing as she asked, "So..." "So...let's get married." Sebastian dropped a bomb in a quiet tone. How could that be!

"Make sure you wipe the counter," I remind him while wearing my panties. "With my tongue?" "Sure, if you wipe again with disinfectant after that." "Awww my little girl all grown up, using the word disinfectant and all. Bet you're getting deflowered any day now!" I smack his head while he laughs, thinking it's funny to keep on teasing me since last week. "I hope his willy isn't as big as mine," okay what now, "so he won't hurt your flower." I wanted to be mad at him, I do, but I laugh instead, stupid Toffer and his little boy talk. *** 30 year old Nina is confused with her hopeless love life. While her best friend pleasures women in the next room, she remains in her space keeping her virginity in-tact, wondering if she’s meant to be with her first love or she needs to move on to find her true soulmate. It takes my first love to end my dating strike. But will it take my first love to end my virginity?

Book 1 of the Blackfern Werewolf Series. Completed - A fully edited version was put up Jan 2024 - please log out and log back in to read this finalized version. It's hard being a half-blooded werewolf… especially when you have no idea that werewolves actually exist. Clementine – I did not know what to expect when I decided to move with my dad and brother to Blackfern Valley in backyard British Columbia. The first thing I noticed was how ridiculously fit and good looking everyone was. Then I started to notice the odd behaviour, comments and how everyone in the town just seemed to hate me. Well, everyone excluding Liam, he seemed like the only friendly person in the Valley… Liam – I was not expecting my world to be shaken so hard when a half-breed moved into the pack. Half-breeds were extremely rare, and often hunted and terminated by pure-blood werewolves if they do not develop a wolf at sixteen. I thought that when his Uncle Jed's reign had ended, that the hatred would have died with him… I was wrong. They were after Clementine and something inside of me could not let that happen…

Aaron Morris had it all. Good looks, a beautiful girlfriend, good grades in college. He only had one problem. He was being stalked by a red-haired nightmare otherwise known as Bella Davis! She was the bane of his existence, a thorn on his side who won't leave him alone no matter what. Will he ever get rid of her or will she continue to annoy him with her unrequited love?*This is the spin-off of The Ugly One but can be read as a stand alone novel. However, I recommended you read that one first :)*

Marriage is never an easy thing and being forced out of your home with nowhere to go, hours after you find out you've been betrayed by your husband and best friend, Tessa Carl is completely torn apart. With no money, a home, or family, what is she to do? Where is she to go? Everything is a huge mess and she's trying hard to fix it all while staying in a hotel where she meets the ever goofy Jake Hensen and extremely hot Austin Kings. Who will claim the damsel and win her heart?

She was a receptionist in one of her friend's luxurious hotels when he walked there to destroy the complete hotel. She remembers him as she knows him well since high school but he doesn't remember her because she is no more the fatty girl which she was back in her high school time. To save her friend's hotel she stood before him and he abduct her from the place. He manipulates her to become his girlfriend. Few months after he forced her into contract marriage. Several exposures exposed in her life and love blooms between them.

Bonnie has spent her entire life being broken down and abused by the people closest to her including her very own twin sister. Alongside her best friend Lilly who also lives a life of hell, they plan to run away while attending the biggest ball of the year while it's being hosted by another pack, only things don't quite go to plan leaving both girls feeling lost and unsure bout their futures. Alpha Nicholas is 28, mateless, and has no plans to change that. It's his turn to host the annual Blue Moon Ball this year and the last thing he expects is to find his mate. What he expects even less is for his mate to be 10 years younger than him and how his body reacts to her. While he tries to refuse to acknowledge that he has met his mate his world is turned upside down after guards catch two she-wolves running through his lands. Once they are brought to him he finds himself once again facing his mate and discovers that she's hiding secrets that will make him want to kill more than one person. Can he overcome his feelings towards having a mate and one that is so much younger than him? Will his mate want him after already feeling the sting of his unofficial rejection? Can they both work on letting go of the past and moving forward together or will fate have different plans and keep them apart?

When a young girl moves to a new town with her Uncle and cousins, she has to complete her senior year at a new school. Her love for tattoos, fighting, fast cars and family is what keeps her going. She tries to ignore everyone to make it through her last year but that doesn't last when she catches the eyes of 3 brothers. The Brothers run the school and town they live in. All 3 are drop dead gorgeous and used to everyone sucking up to them. They have girls all over them every week but none have committed. Their love for all things fast, cars, women and motorcycles, are the only thing on their minds. That is until a new girl shows up and doesn't treat them like everyone else. Her smart mouth, tattoos and attitude intrigue the brothers and they can't wait to have her. Will she give into their advances? Will the brothers give up their fast ways?? Just have to wait and see...... **THIS STORY HAS A LOT OF GRAPHIC SEX SCENES AND SEXUAL SITUATIONS. DO NOT READ IF UNDER 18 OR IF YOU AREN'T INTO THIS TYPE OF BOOK**

Anastasia Tomes (Ana) is an abandoned orphan she-wolf who endures a lifetime of physical, mental, psychological and medical abuse at the hands of Janice, the housemother of the orphanage she is raised in, and Kaira, a witch who is working with the Janice. On her 18th birthday, she is not only kicked out of the Moon Valley Orphanage, but she also meets, and is subsequently rejected by, her destined mate. Ana never shifted and began to believe that she was wolf-less, until after she has left the orphanage. She was kept drugged with wolfsbane, Bella donna and other herbal concoctions, as well as liquid silver which all keep her from developing normally. Ana has been given injections throughout her life and was told it was a medical procedure to keep her alive. These cocktails of toxins caused her to have poor eyesight and extremely low metabolism, causing weight problems, both anomalies of werewolves. Ana meets her wolf, Scarlett, on her birthday after she leaves the orphanage. Scarlett helps her through as she experiences a pattern of rejections: from her parents to her destined mate. Although Ana feels that her life is worthless and that she is unlovable, she feels that she needs to go on a fact-finding journey to find out who she is, what her truths are and what her contribution to the world is. In her travels, she finds that there are unsavory people who will do whatever they can to keep her from her destiny, a destiny she has yet to realize. Will Ana be able to unravel the web of deceit whe has believed all her live, realize her potential and become the she-wolf she was destined to or will she tuck tail and run to keep her sanity and life intact?

He told me she was the little glimmer of light in his dark soul but he lost her and I was the replacement. "You shine like the fucking sun but I don't want you bright, I want you tainted". With that, he claimed me. ***** Tammy Jones was just a college student that returned home for the Christmas holiday. Little did she know the beginning of the holiday was going to be the start of her new life in a world where mayhem and danger lurked. At the time when she'd lost all hope of escaping the cruel world, an extremely good-looking stranger rescued her. But there was more to this stranger than just the good looks. What could go wrong with getting kidnapped and then rescued? You might want to read to know! WARNING: +18 and contains scenes of violence and sexual abuse!!!