Funny Vasectomy Meme Novels & Stories

My husband and I have been married for a decade. When I finally conceive for the first time in ten years, I realize my worst enemies are my family, who all want me dead. I've made a promise to return to the fertility shrine on the mountain and fulfill my vow if things work out, but my mother-in-law deliberately messes up the cable car tickets. In the process of hiking up the mountain for two hours, I lose my baby. In the hospital, I cry to my husband about all the vicious things his mother has done to me, but he kicks me in the stomach. "I had a vasectomy a long time ago. There's no way that bastard inside you is mine!" When he hands me the proof, I'm completely speechless. I break down in tears and run back to my parents' place. Not only do my parents hire a nanny to help take care of me, but they even move out of the house so I can rest in tranquility. When I'm eight months pregnant, I overhear them whispering in the bathroom. "We can never let Gina have the baby. I don't care if it kills her—we're all screwed if the child is born!" "Relax. The doctor already told me that Gina's got leukemia from all the formaldehyde in our new house. Even the baby's deformed!" Shocked, I burst into the bathroom to confront them, but the slippery floor causes me to fall hard. Instantly, blood snakes across the tiles. As I lie there in pain, I look up and see the cold, twisted smiles on my parents' faces before taking my last breath. I cannot fathom why my family wants me dead. I thought they'd been looking forward to his baby for a decade. When I open my eyes again, I return to the very day my mother-in-law insists on taking me to the mountain.

After seven years of marriage, Kayla Campbell had finally become pregnant. But during her prenatal checkup, she noticed something was wrong. The space to fill in the name of the child’s father was blank. She instinctively spoke up. "The father should be Luke Hudson. Was it missed during registration?" In Havenport's upper circles, almost everyone was aware of how devoted the head of the Hudson family was to his wife. He loved her so deeply that he had once been willing to undergo a vasectomy for her. "Kayla, watching you take medicine and get injections again and again breaks my heart. You're everything to me. If having a child means you have to suffer like this, then I would rather never have one." Perhaps the heavens were touched by them. Luke was a man known for his decisive and ruthless nature. On the day they confirmed her pregnancy, he had knelt and pulled her into his arms, crying until his voice gave out. He had personally handled all the medical registration paperwork afterward. With how carefully he treated her, a mistake like this made no sense. The staff member was clearly new to the job, and she worked at the computer for a long while before finally nodding. "The father's name was blank when the file was created." As she continued checking, her expression changed slightly. "But Mr. Hudson's name does appear in another patient's record. He's listed as the father of her child. The mother's name is Stephanie Campbell. Do you know her?" Kayla froze. Her thoughts went blank. People in their social circle all knew Kayla's background. She had been adopted by the Campbell family. But when the family finally found their biological daughter, they accused Kayla of having taken their real daughter's place for years and kicked her out without mercy. That biological daughter was Stephanie.

How can a young, cute man have bad intentions? He just wants to "warm your bed". Open it and experience a whirlwind romance. “I Slept With My Ex-boyfriend's Uncle” When I was drunk, I went to see my ex-boyfriend and tried to get back with him. But when I woke up, I found his uncle lying beside me. “A Brave Jump to My Crush” A love story between an aloof Prince Charming and a funny underachieving girl。 I had been in love with him for many years, and I finally went after him. On the night of our classmate reunion, I pretended to be drunk. I took his clothes off and tried to sleep with him. But I regretted it halfway through.

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

Two months into my cold war with Sean, the lover he’d been keeping finally danced her way right up to me, the real deal. Everyone expected me to react the same way I always had before, kicking up a huge scene to stake my claim. Instead, I looked at the intimate photos of Sean and her in the group chat, smiled, and sent them my blessing. [Looking good. Wishing you two a long and happy life.] The chat went dead silent. Sean must’ve sobered up from his little paradise because in the middle of the night, he drove home and pounded on my door. He was furious. “Do you think this is funny?” However, I only met his gaze calmly. “Honestly, after all these years, none of it is.”

The wife of the richest man, Andre Walker, in town needs blood desperately after suffering from complications in childbirth. Upon realizing that she has a rare blood type, which I share, I don't hesitate to lend her a helping hand. In order to thank me properly, Andrew decides to gift me a villa located in the heart of the city as well as 30 million dollars in cash. My roommate, Vera Hawthorn, who always rides the high horse of morality, is pissed off when she finds out about the rewards. "Your blood is a part of your body! What's the difference between you selling your blood and selling your body? I can't imagine just how filthy and disgusting you are right now! "That man already has a wife, and yet you still throw yourself at him! You're no different from a homewrecker!" In my previous life, I was filled with shame after hearing Vera's brainwashing reasoning. Not only did I turn down Andre's rewards, but I also cut off all ties with all men in my life. Since then, I never attended any classes conducted by male lecturers, which resulted in me flunking many subjects even though I was about to graduate. So, the head of my department decided to delay my graduation. Left without a choice, I begged Vera to help tutor me in my studies, only for her to post my desperate visage on the Internet. "What an idiot! Independent women must solve every hardship they come across in this era! Don't you feel ashamed for asking me for help? "I can't believe you failed this many subjects! If I were you, I'd just kill myself!" The video went viral on the Internet. My desperate expression was made into a meme, which circulated around the Internet like crazy. Meanwhile, Vera became a famous influencer because of this incident. That night, I suffered from a mental breakdown and took my own life by overdosing on pills. When I open my eyes again, I've returned to the day I'm about to donate my blood.

Due to her manly name, Ryan, a 23-year-old woman, was forced to live in the same house with five billionaires - Terban, Kyle, Chaylen, Slyvester, and Vincent. She thought everything will go smoothly if she stays away from these men who always fight each other. Until one day, the handsome men started to act weirdly around Ryan. Will she be able to survive in the house with five hot guys who stare at her as if she's a lamb in the den of the Wolves?

TangShi is a girl without much luck in the world. Despised by her father after her mother died giving birth to her, she has grown up in a cold and unloving environment and hated by her stepmother. Blamed for things she could never control and treated as an outcast by her own blood. Forced to come home after finally escaping to school on a self achieved scholarship abroad, she is promised to the son of the Leng family. To create a beneficial business alliance to further her own father's greed in the corporate world. Only YuZhi Leng is as unwilling as she is, with a girlfriend already in place that he adores and no desire to honor the contract put in place - to produce an heir in the first year of marriage and solidify the two families union. TangShi must bear living as a third wheel in this unwanted life and accept or be thrown aside by her family. Until upon meeting, she realizes that YuZhi may not be the stranger to her she thought he was and recognizes him on sight. Could he be the man she met eight years ago at a masked ball, who swept her off her feet and made her feel alive, and yet left her heartbroken that fateful night? A rollercoaster of a marriage is about to be embarked upon.

Cassandra is summoned by a magical owl, and she discovers that another world exists in the middle of Siberia, where monsters, faeries, elves, and sorcerei fight for domination. She soon becomes inextricably involved in the affairs of this 'other dimension' that lies behind a magical mirror, and everyone in that realm is at the mercy of the blue moon. But Cassandra has never expected to meet a sorceress quite like Princess Vasilisa, not to mention, she is an actual legendary Vasilisa the Wise from the fairytale she has read as a kid. Vasilisa is also a daughter of an evil sorcerer Czar, and whose plan is to overrule the human world and the magical world with the help of an all-powerful dark lord, Koschei, the Deathless. When the night of the solstice arrives, Cassandra's mortal realm and the magical one will collide. If she doesn't help Vasilisa find the Golden Wand and stop her greedy father before the winter solstice, both their lives and everyone else's will fall into an inevitable apocalypse.

Charlie is a childish woman with a lot of secrets from the past that she can't tell to her husband, Drake. Drake is a serious type of person who will bear the struggles of being a husband of Charlie and might put him in a very dangerous situation because of the secrets Charlie have. Such as being an ex-assassin and currently a loan shark. With a misunderstanding in the past incident, someone will die, someone will be save and someone will have to pay. The question is.........who will be who?