Seriously Funny Jokes

"Why do you hate me so much, Maan" she asked hiccupping, hitting his chest. "I never said that" he said holding her hands. ____________________________________ "So, my Ita, how does it feels to be Mrs. Dutta," he asked holding her from behind while making eye contact in the mirror. "Best feeling in this world, Mr. Dutta" she replied kissing his cheek. ____________________________________ "I BLOODY ASKED YOU TO DO ONE THING BUT YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT!" he shouted slamming the wooden desk with his fists. "I am sorry, sir" she replied with tears welling up in her eyes. ____________________________________ "I will kill that man if I see him near you again" he said dangerously running his index finger from her forehead to neck. "W...why" she asked stammering. "Because you are mine"...

Sa gitna ng masalimuot na buhay sa Maynila, si Heart Cruz, isang dedicated nurse, ay nagkakaroon ng muling pagkikita kasama ang kanyang mga kaibigan mula pagkabata, sina Althea, Angie, at Janith. Isang araw, habang abala sa kanyang duty sa isang pribadong hospital, nakatagpo siya ng hindi inaasahang insidente kay Brandon Flores, isang mayamang businessman at may-ari ng hotel at beach resort at isang Multi-Billionare. Ang isang simpleng banggaan ay nagresulta sa isang hindi kanais-nais na pagkakahawakan na nagpasiklab ng galit ni Heart. Habang ang kanyang kaibigan na si Janith ay nalalapit na sa panganganak, nagiging masalimuot ang sitwasyon nang magtagpo muli ang kanilang mga landas. Sa gitna ng emosyon at tensyon, kailangang harapin ni Heart ang kanyang galit at ang mga hindi inaasahang damdamin kay Brandon, na tila may mas malalim na ugat sa kanyang galit at ang kanyang asal na para dito. Ano kaya mangyari sa dalawa habang tinatahak ang hamon ng kanilang nakaraan at kasalukuyan? May pag-ibig ba kayang mabubuo sa kanilang alitan. Ano kayang kwentong sa pagkakaibigan? May pag-ibig pa kayang bumuo sa kanilang wasak na puso? At pagtuklas sa tunay na pagkatao sa kabila ng mga pagsubok at hamon sa buhay? "PAHIRAM NG ISANG GABI (BOOK #1)

Zane is a werewolf and his planet was destroyed by vampires. His mother sent him to Earth, the planet of humans, just before their planet was destroyed. Zane was a young werewolf and he didn't know how to survive on his own, in a planet of humans, but then, he found an orphanage and his life changes

The childs gone. The dreams gone. I've become comfortably numb Valentina Lombardi has been through a lifetime of trauma throughout her years. From her absentee, abusive father who's neglected her all her life to her even more abusive legal guardian who's been the one to traumatize her. A trip to what she sees as her second bedroom, the police station, takes a turn of events with a piece of information she receives that changes everything. Zane Marino, leader of the Marino mafia, and Raul Romano, one of his top men. Dead. The two men who've destroyed her are now out of her life, a miracle to her. Now, she's being thrown into the custody of her eight older brothers she never knew she had. Her biological family. Not to mention, her eldest brother who's now her legal guardian, also happens to be the leader of the Sicilian mafia. Her "father's" pure enemy. What happens when she has to learn to deal with the infamous, ruthless Lombardi brothers, the ones she was raised to hate? Marino through adoption and Lombardi by blood. A dangerous mix. Throw trauma, boys, secrets, and utter chaos into the mix. How will it all play out when her inner demon's come to the surface, making everything unravel right under her two feet?

Isang babaeng kinatatakokotan ng kahit sinong tao na makabangga niya dahil sa angking galing nito sa pakikipagtunggali--- Nathalie Collins. Isang mahusay na NBI Agent, dahil lahat ng misyong ibinibigay sa kaniyan ay walang kahirap-hirap niyang nalutas. Ngunit sa kaniyang puso ay nakapaloob ang lungkot at paghihiganti upang mabigyan ng katarungan ang mga magulang na basta na lang pinatay ng taong hindi niya kilala. Sa patuloy niyang paghahanap sa mga kriminal na pumaslang sa pamilya niya, ay unti-unti namang lumalambot ang puso niya sa babaero niyang boss na si Frank Smith. Para sa kanya ay kailangan niyang sumipilin ang kaniyang puso lalo na at alam ni Natalie na sa bandang huli ay siya pa rin ang uuwing luhaan. Ngunit hanggang kailan niya kayang paglabanan ang pag-ibig na nadarama para kay Frank? At may pag-asa pa kayang makamit ng mga magulang ni Natalie ang hustisyang nararapat para sa pamilya?

Upang huwag matuloy ang arrange marriage ni Franki Avella sa lalaking hindi pa niya nakikita at nakikila, nag pasyang maglayas ang dalaga. Nag disguised siya bilang pangit na babae sa katauhan ni Fancy upang walang may makakilala sa kanya. Namasukan siyang kasambahay nang binatang si Argel Montero. Meet Argel Montero - Tall, dark and handsome na secretly inlove sa kababata nito na si Steffie Carion. Na may iba naman na minamahal. Katulad ni Franki Avella ay biktima din ang binata nang arrange marriage ng mga magulang nito. Asot-pusa kung silang dalawa ay mag kasama na nauwi din sa pag mamahalan, na humantong din sa pag-iiwanan. Ngunit sadyang mapaglaro ang tadhana. Dahil ang lalaking ayaw ni Franki pakasalan ay walang iba kundi, si Argel Montero ang lalaking minsan na niyang nakasama at minahal. Minahal magpahanggang ngayon...

Sext Buddy: [I’d do anything to fuck you right now.] Alicia: [I want you so bad too…really.] During the summer, Alicia has been sexting with a total stranger in hopes that she’d never meet him. At the beginning of college, her mum tells her that they have a guest. She meets the stranger she was constantly sexting. But then, what happens when the stranger is her cousin?

Punya tetangga absurd yang nyebelin banget? Tahan apa enggak, ya? Tenang, kami bakalan tetap bisa berteman, kok. Kita kerjain aja sekalian!

Rhoda Schurz is known for being a born-again Christian missionary and she falls in love with Rudolf Wagner, who is a resigned U.S Army officer. They encounter a tragic accident and that gives him pain. Their marriage presents enumerable conflicts. Rhoda overcomes all in the eyes of faith in Jesus Christ. Rudolf is convinced that JESUS healed him and he also follows Christ's teaching with Rhoda, whom he loves.

I was a regular interior designer until my life took a whirlwind turn when I was hired to renovate the luxurious property of Ethan Blackwood, a powerful billionaire with a reputation for being ruthless and cold. Our first encounter was a clash of wills, with Ethan acting like an arrogant asshole, and me, trying to maintain my composure to keep the job. But beneath his tough exterior, I sensed an undeniable attraction between us. Despite my resolution to stay away from him, fate seemed to draw us together. But just as we started to build something real, a dark secret from my past resurfaced, threatening to destroy everything.