I'm honestly skeptical about the whole premise. Most of these books seem to be repackaged 1970s neuro-linguistic programming stuff mixed with modern, clickbaity self-help jargon. The core idea—using subconscious cues to create attraction—often treats emotional connection like a technical problem you can hack, which feels dehumanizing to me. Real intimacy builds from shared vulnerability and consistent presence, not from planting sneaky verbal 'triggers' or mirroring body language as a calculated tactic.
That said, I did read one, 'The Like Switch', which is more about genuine friendliness and rapport-building from an ex-FBI guy. It had some useful bits about making people feel heard, but even then, the application to a romantic partnership feels... off. If you're studying your partner like a subject to be influenced, you've already stepped out of an authentic connection. The whole genre might give someone a false sense of control or a list of scripts, potentially damaging trust if discovered.
I'd argue the time is better spent on books like 'Hold Me Tight' by Sue Johnson, which is grounded in adult attachment theory. It frames emotional connection as a secure bond to cultivate, not a seduction to engineer. The 'subliminal' angle seems better suited for shallow, short-term dynamics than for the deep, messy work of a real relationship. It leans toward manipulation, even if the stated goal is connection, and that ethical gray area makes me deeply uncomfortable.