Chapter 3

I have never been so unmotivated.

Groaning inwardly, I roll out of bed and went into the bathroom to shower. I brushed my teeth afterward and picked out my clothes.

I couldn't even sleep last night. Everything sucked. I felt even worse when I saw myself in the mirror with dark circles under my eyes and was paler than ever.

I put on a plain fitted lavender crop-top with long sleeves, high-waisted black jeans, and black Vans. I didn't bother to style my hair since I was feeling lazy.

I head downstairs and start to quickly eat my breakfast. Mom comes out of her room, already dressed for work, with a towel wrapped around her hair. She starts to eat her breakfast while I already finished mine and put my plate on the sink.

I grabbed my bag, kissed her goodbye and walked out the door.

Walking my way to the bus stop, I look at my surroundings. It all feels so new, but it doesn't give me the nausea of 'being new', unlike when we just moved in.

Since I was new, I don't want to be those students that get lost and be late on their first day and first subject in school. Or maybe even their second one.

So I saved myself from all the stress and risk of being late.

Last night, since I couldn't sleep, I went to the school's website and studied the campus map.

It took less than 15 minutes if I do say so myself.

It also says on the website that school starts at 8, the earliest school bus at 7.

I guess I'll wait a few more minutes.

There are only 5 of us here.

There're 3 freshmen. (I knew cause I heard them talking about it.)

And Ally's brother.

This bus reeks, and has mosquitos flying around. I wanna go home already.

After a few more minutes, I have arrived at my loathed destination.


I tried my best to remember, but focusing on my thoughts right now is pretty difficult since everyone is looking at me. I guess this is how they treat fresh meat.

Seeing how people keep on looking at me made me feel nauseous all over again. It's so frustrating not being able to know what's on their mind. What do they think of me? Is something on my face? Do tell.

I swear I'll be a better person now since I'm having a bit of a taste test of hell.

Although, torture and hell fire is way better than this. What the hell do they want me to do? Breakdance?

I slightly laugh at my own choice of words.

Of course people just really have to see me laughing by myself. Great, now they think I'm psycho.

Eventually, after walking around, I got to the school's main office.

I picked up my schedule and decided to just hang out at the cafeteria while I wait for the bell to ring.

“Mel?" I look up.

I immediately sighed in relief when I saw a familiar face.

“Chloe," I smile and she sits on the chair opposite mine.

“So, how're your first few minutes of your first day here so far?" She asks.

Hell, duh.

“It is great," I fake a smile.

The bell rings, signaling the start of classes.

Chloe tells me to meet up at the same table at lunch break before separating with me as we both go to our first classes.

My first subject; English.

As if everything isn't bad enough, the teacher made me stand in front of the whole class and made me introduce myself.

I loathe everyone.

We were assigned to read a book of our choice and have to make an essay about it, due next week.

Truth be told, I was too lazy to read a new book so I decided to make an essay about a book that I have already read.

The rest of the day was a blur, I had lunch with Chloe, and Ollie wasn't around since he was sick.

Chloe claimed that he was probably lying since he went to some stupid ass party and was just hungover.

While eating, we found out that we have two classes together.

I asked her to show me around after our last class and she agreed.

I did master the twists and turns of the school last night, but it's different when you actually see it.

She finished giving me a tour of the school at nearly 4 and the bus leaves at 4:30.

I thanked Chloe for the tour and told her I'd see her tomorrow. I am seriously wishing that no more surprise events happen today. I'm both tired physically and mentally.

The first day of school ended. Unfortunately for me, I still have many hours before the late evening.

Late evening when I can peacefully eat dinner, go back up to my room and sulk.

Many things could still happen, which is the last thing I want for today.

I got home and saw mom arranging some papers on the coffee table.

I went up to my room, played some music, and wrote the essay and did my other homeworks that aren't due until Friday.

I like to play safe, sue me.

Or, in other words, I have nothing else better to do with my life at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. Or any time for that matter.

After I was done, I wrote down a list of what I might do tomorrow while waiting for dinner.

I'm still having a hard time grasping the fact that I am both productive and lazy at the same time.

Though it doesn't make life any less depressing.

After a while, mom called me downstairs for dinner.

"How was your first day?" She asks, breaking the silence.

"It was great, I met this girl named Chloe, she showed me around campus," I tell her, leaving out my anxiety attacks and that I'm probably bulimic since I puked my whole lunch in the bathroom and missed half of 5th period.

"You know, I met a sweet boy yesterday, their house is just across the street."

"Oh wow, that's nice," I say, praying that's all she is going to say.

"His mom is inviting us over for dinner, Friday night." She adds.

Well, shit.

Good thing I finished all the requirements for this week, then. Yay.

I tried my best to look intrigued.

The whole day was depressing enough and now I have to socialize with more people?

I'm feeling euphoric, thanks mom. 

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