CHAPTER 5

The smell of disinfectant was too strong but I couldn’t complain. Only Saint Anthony’s Hospital has the most affordable rate for someone like me. I could barely pay the bills but I saved enough for my childbirth. Several expectant mothers like me experienced the same pain of labour, but the only difference was, that they had someone to pat their back while I had nobody.

I was alone!

Then, a sickening pain shot through my stomach, and I wrapped my arms tightly around it. It was all I could do so that I wouldn’t collapse and wither on the floor. My stomach hurts, and my back hurts. I winced in pain while I tried to massage my back. It was challenging, and my clothes were already drenched in sweat.

Then, it was gone, and I was relieved!

However, a few seconds later, I could feel a dull ache on my back and lower abdomen, and it was like I was having the worst menstrual cramps. I wanted to scream in pain, but I chose not to. Panic gradually took over for a brief moment, and I believed that a way out of the pain seemed increasingly implausible…unless my baby would come out!

I took a deep breath, then another, and another. For a brief moment, my mind returned to a state of calm, but suddenly, the pain worsened, and this time, I called for the attendant. One of the women in the ward exclaimed that the water has broken, and a nurse immediately came.

She smiled at me, but I felt like crying! The pain was terrible!

“It’s alright,” she whispered some words of assurance to me, and it meant a lot.

“I’m scared,” I said to her.

“It’s normal to be scared, Ma’am, but rest assured that you will be taken care of. Come,” she said and led me into the delivery room. Doctors and nurses awaited inside, but when I looked at the bed, I suddenly became uncomfortable.  They assisted me, and while I was lying in bed, I just closed my eyes, and let them do whatever was necessary.

One of the nurses touched my stomach, and there were painful contractions again. This time, my stomach hardened, and they murmured something within themselves. While my legs were spread apart, I peeked at the doctor in front of me. I was embarrassed at first because he’s a man, but he genuinely smiled at me.

The nurses and doctors made me feel comfortable despite being in constant pain. Then they instructed me to listen to the doctor. He was very clear in his instruction that I should listen to him, and my baby would be safely delivered. I only pushed my baby upon the doctor’s instruction, and after trying twice to push the baby out, I finally heard a loud cry of a newly-born.

“It’s a girl!” The doctor announced with glee.

Suddenly, I became emotional that after nine months of having the baby inside my tummy, I could finally see her. My baby cried as loud as she could when they cleaned her. One of the nurses also cleaned me, and a few minutes later, they put her above my chest.

For the first time, I stared at the tiny version of myself…except for the red hair! I have golden locks but she inherited her hair from Jacob. I hoped to see her eyes but they were closed. “My baby,” I whispered while touching her head. She looked so fragile and I was scared to hurt her.

“She’s cute,” one of the nurses commented, and I smiled at her.

“Thank you,” I mouthed to her. She had been nice to me since the time during my prenatal check-ups at the hospital. “Thank you so much,” I said to the rest of them, and they just nodded their head. Helping a woman to deliver a baby could be normal to them since it was their job but to me, they were angels sent by Heaven. I was really grateful for their help!

One hour later, I was back in the ward, and the women congratulated me for successfully delivering my daughter. I was also grateful to them because they kept me company despite making me feel envious that they have a husband, and that I didn’t have one.

I was staring at my newly-born child when one of the nurses came in with a tray. She brought instant formula milk and a bottle. I wondered why she was doing that but it seemed that Saint Anthony didn’t limit her to breastfeeding a baby.

“She will be hungry when she wakes up,” she said. “Do you have someone who can help you prepare the milk in case no milk will come out from your breasts?”

I shook my head and replied, “No, I am alone.’

“Well, that’s kind of sad, but you can manage, right? Anyway, I can help you to prepare this time, or you can ask one of these ladies to help you.”

“I will, thank you. Miss, I don’t know how to breastfeed my baby. You know, my breasts are just normal in size,” I said without telling all the details that I wasn’t gifted in that area.

She laughed, but I didn’t find it funny. However, I had to laugh with her. Then, she suggested that I should lay on my side so that the baby could access my breast. Actually, I believed I could do it while sitting on a chair, but I couldn’t complain a lot.

For a day, I managed, and just being close to my daughter even if she was sleeping most of the time, was the happiest moment of my life. Did my mother feel the same when I was born? I wouldn’t know because she was already gone in this world, and my father wouldn’t talk about her at home. I missed my home, my family, and my friends. In fact, I have been missing them since Roger Middleton kicked me out of the pack.

Actually, I had no idea if it was good luck or bad luck, but I ended up living in Claybourne, the city ruled by Jacob Summers. In just a short span of time, he became more powerful. Claybourne was a truly extraordinary city, which was built on the banks of a modest natural harbour, and its beauty was matched by the backdrop of majestic forests that helped shape the city into what it is today.

The resources provided by these forests were vital but they were also influential in architectural designs, as the vast majority of buildings were built with many natural elements to complement the forests. The skyline was dotted with impressive skyscrapers, which appeared to be rising higher and higher each year. Claybourne’s parks and gardens were flourishing, attracting a lot of attention.

Personally, I loved living in Claybourne. I loved the people especially because rogues like me were allowed to make a living in the city. Although I have experienced a lot of bullying and discrimination, Jacob ordered that werewolves and rogues wouldn’t be driven out of the city.

Upon discovering that the name was ruled by a man named Jacob Summers, I didn’t dare to visit his office and asked for help. Without any assurance that it was the same Jacob Summers I had a one night stand with, I wouldn’t dare to. Besides, even if Claybourne’s leader was that man, still, I wouldn’t ask him for help.

As a Middleton, I am a proud woman, and even if my father stripped everything from me, I survived. I survived alone! Looking at my daughter, I promised to protect and love her forever. I was staring into the little bundle of joy when I thought I saw her smile. Or was I only imagining things?

My first night as a mother was blissful, and regardless of my situation, I was grateful for my daughter. Since that day, when Roger Middleton sent me away, the baby inside my tummy gave me strength, courage, and determination to go on living. Yes, I would admit there were times I felt like living was a useless endeavour, but I couldn’t fail my daughter. I couldn’t fail her as a mother. I should endure the pain and humiliation for her sake.

Sooner or later, I would be able to give her a good life, and I vowed to do everything to sustain her needs. I just loved her so much, and in a short period of time, she has become my world, and everything.

“I love you so much, my daughter,” I whispered into her tiny ears before falling asleep. Nursing her all day was difficult, and I felt like I needed a lot of sleep to recuperate my energy.

In the morning, I woke up feeling disoriented. I rubbed my eyes and studied my surroundings, then I saw the nurse who has been helpful to me ever since. The nurse smiled as she walked closer to me, and then she grabbed a sit beside my bed.

“How are you feeling, Ma’am?”

“Sore,” I admitted the truth.

“I understand,” she said and smiled again. “Actually, I have something to tell you, and this is shocking, probably to you, Ma’am.”

“Tell me,” I said to her, but inwardly, I was nervous as hell.

“You availed of our maternity package, right?”

“Yes, and I’m glad to avail one.”

“Unfortunately, there’s an excess amount that you have to pay. The additional cost actually,” she explained but I couldn’t stop myself from frowning as she went to explain how I incurred additional costs for my childbirth.

“How much?” I inquired, because if I could afford the bill, then it wouldn’t be an issue. I assumed it was just minimal because of the maternity package that I availed myself of. However, the amount she mentioned was so shocking, that I almost fell to the floor. “Excuse me? Are you serious? That’s almost fifty percent of the entire package!”

“Yes, Ma’am. Unfortunately, the one who assisted you today was a top doctor and his fee was quite expensive. It was supposed to be our regular doctor but something came up and she couldn’t come when you were in labour.”

“It wasn’t my fault why she couldn’t come, right?”

“Regardless of whose fault it was, the fact wouldn’t change that you are required to pay an additional amount. Look, I know this is painful to hear, especially when you have just given birth, but I just work here, and the management needs your payment. No payment means you can’t stay longer in the ward,” she announced.