Chapter 48 – Jayler I woke up extremely late the very next morning and I felt overwhelmingly incredible about everything that has happened so far. I don’t feel extra heavy anymore and I have this light air around me that I seem like I’m floating in mid-air for some reason. The rain had just transformed into a rainbow overnight and I guess I’m thankful for my sister in a way for putting this thought in my head that I won’t accomplish anything if I just ignore everything and that I’m the only person who could find the solution to my own predicament. But more than that, I had to give it to myself for deciding to go see Lance last minute and to be quite honest, I wasn’t expecting anything. I wasn’t expecting that it would be solved in a snap and I even had bonus—kissing Lance. If I didn’t go out to see Lance last night, I’m most certainly sulking under the rain right now feeling rather heavy and stressed out and confused. The first thing that came to my mind was what happened last night
Chapter 49 – Jayler I was feeling this electric energy rushing through my veins and it was everything that I didn’t know I needed today. I feel like I’ve taken some ecstasy even though I haven’t really had one to know the actual feeling of it in the first place. This felt relatively new to me in ways that I thought I already know the feeling of reading a feel good message from a certain someone and it turns out that this feeling is entirely different. I stared at Lance’s message saying that he misses me for quite a longer while and a huge part of me just didn’t want to believe it was true. It seemed that I was still dreaming that it felt magically unreal. Perhaps that’s because I wasn’t expecting him to miss me so soon when we were just together yesterday. I guess it’s technically not yesterday because I got home at two a.m. after we spent almost an hour hanging out at the 7/11 store where I first met him. After drinking the bucket of beer that I ordered at Monroe’s, Lance went at th
Chapter 50 – Jayler Sneaking out tonight was most definitely the most impatient moment that I have ever been in my whole life as far as I know. I couldn’t wait to see Lance again and hang out with him. The waiting game from afternoon to dusk felt like a millennium and I was dying because of it. I was busy with my homework throughout the afternoon or at least that’s how I distracted myself from being impatient and thrilled at the very same time. But I just couldn’t focus on what I was doing because somewhere deeper in my head, something was relentlessly bringing the thought of Lance out and it was just pure madness but in a very positive way. I kept on re-opening the message that Lance had sent earlier just to remind me that I finally have found someone that gives me the feeling of happiness even without asking for anything. By the time dusk hit, we were called for dinner. Dad was out again for work again and me, my sister and my mom had a very quiet dinner altogether. At first, it fe
Chapter 51 – Lance Waking up after having that raw and intricately unprecedented conversation with Jayler was something I didn’t know I needed this entire time. I know I have been dying to have a conversation with him just to clear things up but I wasn’t under this impression that it would solve hell of a lot that’s been weighing me down. I felt utterly good in a sense that my chest doesn’t feel heavy anymore and I haven’ felt this good in a very long time—not even before I met Jayler. Last night was probably one of the rawest and I would still say one of the most vulnerable night that I’ve had with someone even though I haven’t shed a single tear, but I was just comfortable with Jayler’s company. I guess I was relatively carried away by the moment that I told bits and pieces of my childhood story to Jayler not knowing that it would give me such a soothing effect. Jayler felt easy to talk to and even when he’s not asking about my background, I felt compelled to tell him some if not al
Chapter 52 – Lance “I haven’t seen you in a long while. What’s going on, Lancelot?” Daniel’s voice seemed to drown from the loudness of the background but I still heard him very clearly. I just got home from the laundromat and it was just about time that Daniel called. “Yeah, sorry about not showing up lately. I was just busy about other stuff.” I lied. I’m not even planning on admitting the fact that I was so down and depressed for the past month to Daniel. He has been one of the most, if not the most, caring friend that I have ever met. Surely, he would give a lot of advice that would have certainly helped my situation but I was just so embarrassed and scared to open things up to him. I know that he never failed to be there for me. He’d been checking on me ever since I began skipping, asking where I was and why didn’t I show up to our regular meet up. “Other stuff? Do you mean you just don’t want to see us?” Daniel voiced out and I do think he has all the right to think like that
Chapter 53 – Lance The night was surely promising in a lot of ways not exactly for me but for Jayler and his journey. I know things are moving a lot faster than it should be but I feel like it’s just fitting that I introduce him to this world now rather than waiting just to take things at a slower pace. This is going to be his first time seeing a drag show and I just thought it’s just the perfect place for the introduction and I’m pretty certain that he’ll have a blast while still learning about the stuff that he needs to learn. I’m likely to believe that he’ll be shocked with the vibrant culture and the myriad of gay stuff that he’ll be learning tonight but he’s going to have a good time. “Here we are,” I mouthed once we got out of the taxi. “The Babylon Club.” “Okay. This is where we are meeting your friends?” He asked observing the entrance of the club. “Yes this is where all of the fun stuff happens.” I trailed reassuring him that we’ll be having some fun tonight. “Me and my fr
Chapter 54 – Lance Jayler just shook his head at the simple question that he doesn’t know what a twink is. Of course he doesn’t know that, he’s barely even out to the world and the job is to educate him with all of the things that he needs to know including defining what a twink is. Even if he ends up being straight which is still up in the air, educating him about LGBTQIA+ community is a must. He’s curios enough and there’s this famous saying that says “curiosity killed the cat” and I won’t let him be how the cat ends up. Not literally kill him but I won’t let his curiosity bring any kind of harm towards him. “You, a twink is someone like you.” Holding the glass of her newly refilled Margarita with such effortless grace, Dianna pointed towards Jayler. I looked at him and I could already tell that the wheels inside Jayler’s head are turning. “I…I’m confused.” Jayler was still shaking his head. “You see, there are different types of gays.” I began stepping into the forefront. It’s t
Chapter 55 – Lance A mix of vodka and nicotine lingered from Jayler’s mouth as he eagerly sucked my lower lip with such wetness. I was just trying to put him to bed knowing that he’s already fucked up wasted but he seemed to have gained his consciousness back once he realized we weren’t at the Babylon Club anymore. I gently kissed him back just to let him know that I’m aware of what’s currently happening but the truth was, I don’t really have the right strength to fight back and somehow, I’m thinking that I should be mindful of my actions. I’m still aware of the blatant fact that Jayler’s still a minor and even if he’s turning eighteen in the next few weeks or so, it’s really not a valid reason for me to give him everything intimately sensual that he wanted. I attempted to unfasten my lips from his. I was slowly and carefully pulling away hoping that he’d be sleepy enough to let me go but then he noticed what I was trying to move away. He grabbed the back of my head pulling me back wi