THE PRIEST’S LITTLE TOY PART-2

Chapter 2

Luca's Pov

I lowered myself down to my knees right there on the wooden floor of his office, feeling the hard surface pressing through my pants. My heart was pounding so loud I could hear it thumping in my ears and my hands were shaking a little as I rested them on my thighs. The room had this heavy smell of incense and old books that made everything feel even more serious and holy than it already was. I kept my eyes on the floor at first because looking up at him felt too intense right now. Everything about this moment felt wrong, like I was stepping over some line I could never step back from, but I stayed there anyway, waiting to see what he would do next. Part of me wanted to get up and leave but I just... couldn't.

Father Rex stood right in front of me, tall and strong in his black robes. He did not speak for a long time. He just looked down at me with those deep eyes that seemed to see everything I was trying to hide. Then he reached out and put one big hand on top of my head, his fingers slowly moving through my hair. The touch was gentle but it carried so much weight that it sent a strange shiver all the way down my back. I tried to ignore it but it was hard, really hard.

“That is better,” he said softly, his voice filling the quiet room. “Kneeling like this shows real humility, Luca. It tells God that you are ready to open up your soul and accept the guidance you need. A lot of boys have come to me just like you, carrying heavy burdens, and I have helped them find their way back to a cleaner path.”

I swallowed hard, my throat feeling tight. I could still feel the mess in my clothes from earlier, a constant reminder of how weak I had been right before coming here. “I do not know how to be pure anymore, Father,” I whispered, the words coming out before I could stop them. “The thoughts keep coming every night when I am alone. The images from those videos. I try to pray them away but they only get louder and stronger in my head. I feel like I am already failing before I even start this new life here. I keep thinking about it and it makes me feel so ashamed but I can't stop.”

His fingers kept moving slowly through my hair, stroking in a way that felt way too personal for something like confession. “Those thoughts are the devil testing you, my boy. Lust is a very strong temptation, especially for someone your age who is full of energy and life. But you do not have to fight it by yourself in the dark. I am here to help you through it, to teach you the kind of discipline your soul needs to become the kind of altar boy you are meant to be.”

He kept talking for what felt like forever after that, his voice calm and steady like the prayers we were supposed to learn. He told me about other boys who had come to him with the same problems, how they had learned to give up their weaknesses and find strength by listening to his guidance. While he spoke, his hand moved from my hair down to the side of my face. He gently lifted my chin so I had to look at him. His eyes held mine and would not let go. I felt completely exposed, like he could see every bad thought I had ever had in my life and it made my stomach twist.

“Tell me more about these thoughts, Luca,” he said quietly. “Do not hold anything back. Describe them to me so I can help you understand where the temptation is really coming from.”

My face got hot with shame, but I started talking anyway. I told him about the videos I used to watch when I was alone, the way my body would react even when I knew it was wrong, the fantasies that kept me awake at night. Every word made me feel smaller and more embarrassed, but his hand stayed on my face, his thumb sometimes brushing my cheek like he was trying to comfort me. It only made everything more confusing because part of me wanted to pull away while another part kept leaning into the touch without meaning to. I hated how good it felt.

When I finally ran out of things to say, he nodded slowly like he understood everything. “You are carrying a very heavy load, my boy. But I have helped many others who were in the same position as you. Some of them are still here in the church, living much cleaner lives now because they learned to trust my guidance completely.” His hand slid down to my shoulder and squeezed gently, then moved to rest on my chest, right over my heart. I could feel how fast it was racing under his palm and I wondered if he could feel it too.

“As part of your penance for tonight,” he said, reaching into one of the drawers in his desk, “you will wear this.” He held up a simple piece of rough rope. “Wrap it around your waist under your clothes. It will be a constant reminder of the promise you are making to fight against temptation. Every time you feel that pull, the rope will press against your skin and bring you back to this moment, back to the help you are receiving here.”

I took the rope with shaky hands and did what he told me, lifting my shirt and tying it around my waist. The fibers dug in just enough that I would feel it with every little movement I made. Father Rex watched me the whole time without taking his eyes off me. When I finished and pulled my shirt back down, he gave a small nod of approval.

“Good boy,” he said in a low voice, and those two words sent a weird warmth through my chest even though I knew I should not feel good about any of this. “You are already showing obedience. That is the first important step toward real change.”

He helped me stand up then, his hands firm on my arms as he pulled me a little closer for a moment. It almost felt like a normal hug from someone older, but there was something heavier in the way his body pressed against mine. I could feel the strength in him and the warmth coming through his clothes, and my breath caught in my throat. When he finally let go, I stepped back fast, my legs feeling weak and my mind all over the place.

“You will come to me every evening from now on for these private sessions,” he told me as I moved toward the door. “We will continue your training here, away from the other boys and away from everyone else. The path to becoming pure is not easy, Luca, but I will walk it with you step by step. You are not alone in this anymore.”

I nodded, still not able to find my voice. My mind was spinning with so much guilt and fear and a strange kind of excitement I did not want to admit to. The rope around my waist rubbed against my skin with every step I took, reminding me of everything that had just happened. As I reached for the door handle, Father Rex spoke one last time.

“Tomorrow morning you will serve at the altar during prayers. Wear your robes properly and show the others what a devoted altar boy looks like. And remember… Daddy is watching over you now. You belong to this guidance.”

I slipped out of the office and closed the door quietly behind me. The hallway felt colder than it had before. My legs were still shaky as I made my way back to the small room they had given me. I kept thinking about his hands on me, the way he had called me a good boy, and how he had looked at me like I was already his to shape. Shame kept washing over me in big waves, but right behind it came that same confusing thrill that made my stomach twist.

When I finally got to my room and closed the door, I leaned against it for a long time, trying to catch my breath. I touched the spot where the rope was hidden under my shirt and closed my eyes. This was only the beginning. I had come here to become pure and to serve God the way I was supposed to. Instead I was already kneeling in front of a man who made me call him Daddy and feeling things I knew were dangerous.

Sleep did not come easily that night. Every time I moved in bed, the rope reminded me of his touch and his words. I kept seeing his face in the dark, hearing his deep voice promising to guide me. My body stayed restless, tense with feelings. I tried to pray away. But the prayers felt empty. All I could think about was the next evening when I would have to go back to his office and kneel again.

I was supposed to be starting a holy life.

Instead I was already falling into something I did not understand at all.