I watch him help her in the passenger seat of his truck and kiss her forehead before he closes the door.Walking back from the truck, Lucas stops in front of me and I can tell he doesn’t want to leave me on my own. Ever since he and Kel started dating, he’s been like a brother to me. Looking out for me. Being an ear to my worries and fears throughout this ordeal ever since I met Gavin and how my past has kept us from truly living out of the darkness. I wish he wouldn’t worry so much about me. Kel, too. They deserve happiness.“I’ll be fine. It’s only a five minute drive. Go take care of her, Luke.”Lucas draws his eyebrows together and looks at me for a while, almost like he’s trying to penetrate my thoughts. Finally he relents and leans in to kiss my head.“I’ll have her call you in the morning before we leave. Be safe.”Lucas gives me a small, concerned smile and ducks into the car, waving before peeling out of the parking lot and leaving me standing there.I blow out a breath, sha
I hear voices as the weight of darkness starts to ebb away from my mind and body, replaced with such pain in my face, hands, and stomach that I struggle to pull one small breath of air into my lungs."Is she going to be okay?" I know it is Gavin’s voice with all my heart. I would recognize his voice anywhere. His voice is laced with such fear that I want to reach out and comfort him, hold him. But, I can’t. My eyelids are too heavy to open and my limbs are impossible to move with such pain ratcheting my body. My mind is foggy and all I feel is Gavin's hand holding mine, squeezing tight and keeping me from falling back under the darkness."She's been beaten badly, but thankfully we got to her before anything worse could happen to her. She has broken ribs, cuts and bruises, but they will heal. It could be hours until she wakes up and then we'll be able to tell if she's suffered any emotional or mental damage. We'll do some tests to make sure she hasn’t lost any blood we're not aware o
GavinI watch silently as Dr. Lee, the very same doctor who treated me only a few short months ago, checks my girl over. When he lifts her chin to examine the yellowing bruises across her cheek bone and eyes, I want to jump out of my skin knowing she’s in pain from that fucker. Bryce Williams. When we found the abandoned cabin where he was hiding Sophia, all I was focused on was getting her out of there alive. But Spencer knew to be prepared. I see Sophia’s eyes close as she flinches away from the doctor and I know if Spencer hadn’t shot the man responsible – I would have. I would have killed him.Blowing out a breath, I start to pace up and down the hospital corridor, impatient to go back in there with her. Being away from her after the torture of these last twenty four hours is almost too much to take. Christ, I could have lost her.“Mr. Thomas?” I hear the doctor’s voice and turn to face him. Shadows cover his face and somehow I know the news he has for me will be worse than I
SophiaThe ocean waves crash in and out of the shore of the lake and I watch them rip in and out in time with the setting sun behind me. I can hear Gavin approaching from behind me as well, and the warmth his presence brings me covers my unheated skin. I only wear a shawl over my slender shoulders and the light sundress I wear tonight isn’t warding off the chill the wind brings in as the sun sets.“Hey, Beautiful. I was looking for you.” I hear his voice first, smooth as velvet to my ears.Gavin pulls me gently into his chest and into his warm embrace. I sag against him and tip my face up to see the stormy blue gray eyes I’ve come to memorize since I’ve known him.“I missed you. Are you feeling okay?”I turn fully into his embrace and rest my chin on his collarbone as I blink up at him.“Yes. Where were you?”His eyes narrow and just now do I realize he is shirtless and there is a small inked design across his right shoulder. I move a step back and read it carefully.Never Forget,T
I wake just like before except now I feel Gavin’s smooth hand along my back and his muffled voice telling me I’m safe now. What he doesn’t know is that I’m not afraid because of Bryce or what he put me through. I’m afraid that I’ll never get the chance to love a child the way I know I would have loved our baby. I move my head to the crook of his neck and inhale his musky smell. I love his smell and if I close my eyes, I can remember every time he’s held me like this. I wish to God it was enough to fill the gaping hole inside of me.“I dreamed of her,” I whisper. It feels as if a secret is told through those words, but I have to say it.He deserves the whole truth of what I’m feeling. No less.Gavin leans away slightly at my words and I see the stark pain in his stormy eyes.“I would have named her Tessa Lynn. After your grandmother. She had your brown hair and my green eyes and she was so beautiful, Gavin. She was our baby.”Thick tears fill his eyes as he nods. My breath leaves me,
I lie in the hospital bed and will myself to go outside of this room and beg Gavin to come back. To hold me. To be with me. But in my heart, even with how painful it is, I know if I do that, I’ll only hurt him. I have to find a way to heal on my own and then maybe, just maybe, we can be what we used to be. When I can look at his face and see the love and contentment he’s brought out in me. When I won’t see everything we’ve lost. Everything I lost. One thing I’m thankful for is that it seems I’ve cried all the tears I can musterand maybe that’s a good thing. I curl into the lumpy mattress beneath me and close my eyes to sleep. I lie eyes closed, feet burrowed into the sheets and will a deep sleep to find me. But I can’t seem to fallback into the darkness. I hear a faint knock on the door and see the young and tired looking face of Nurse Maggie pop inside my room. She smiles gently, for sure she must know what happened and the sympathy or pity on her face is almost too much to see
Somewhere deep inside me I’m asking the same question she probably asked herself back over a year ago. Is the loss, the pain all I can feel now? Or can I still let love into my heart from those around me?“I came as soon as I got off the plane, Sweetheart. How are you feeling?”She sits beside me and wraps an arm around my back, supporting my weight.“I feel so lost, Mom. I lost… I was pregnant.” The words seem inadequate to describe the enormity of what I, what Gavin and I lost and I have to force myself to breathe once I’ve said the painful truth I still can’t fathom. My mom’s wide eyes fill with understanding as she nods and before I know it, I’m engulfed in her warm arms. The tears come and this time I don’t stop them. My cries are muffled into her black and gray blouse and she coos reassuring words like it’ll be okay and I’m here for you. Somehow, I hope she’s right. The emotion erupts from the deepest parts inside me and my mother’s arms feel like the only thing holding me up
Three Months LaterGavinI close the door softly to my bedroom and walk towards the bed to see my younger sister curled up like a cat in the middle of it. She has started coming over more and more ever since Sophia was let out of the hospital, almost as if she thinks that if she isn’t here to watch me I’ll run over to Kel and Lucas’ and beg her to see me. Has it crossed my mind, yes but she asked me for time. I’d hoped that after a few days, I could convince her to come home so we could work on us. So we could be what we were only a few short months ago. Happy. In love. Free from the weight of the past, both hers and mine. But except for three chance meetings where I got to see my Sophia, she’s refused to see me. Lucas told me she is putting all her focus into the ballet show she’d auditioned for back in June. I’m so happy she’s found a way to fill her passion that drew me right to her when we first met. But it feels worse knowing that I can’t be there to see her perform, to see