The Nightmare

Naya’s POV

I didn’t mean to fall asleep...

That was the first mistake i made that night...the second mistake was dreaming.

I knew i was dreaming, but the smell wafted to me, smelling so real...

Smoke and iron and burned fur.

It crawled into my lungs before I could stop myself from inhaling it... The smell was so thick and pungent, it literally chocked me.

It smelt so wrong. And in the dream, my eyes opened and I was standing in the middle of my pack courtyard, except it wasn’t a courtyard anymore. It was torn open like a deep wound.

Buildings burned, the sky was blood red, the kind that made everything look already dead.

“No,” I whispered.

My voice sounded small. Bodies were everywhere.

Werewolves I knew. Wolves I trained with. Faces I’d laughed with. Some half-shifted, some human, some torn apart so badly I couldn’t tell which they’d been last. Flies already gathered, feasting on the dead. The air buzzed with them.

My boots were wet which made me to look down.

Blood soaked the ground and climbed halfway up my legs. It was thick and sticky and still warm.

“No no no no...”

A sound cut through the ringing in my ears.

“Naya.”

My head snapped up... And my father stood across the courtyard.

Relief hit so hard it hurt my heart.

He was alive... he was standing...he was...

He was covered in blood.

He was drenched in his blood. His chest torn open, ribs visible through his shredded flesh. One of his arms hung wrongly, almost nearly severed. His throat was gashed deep enough that I could see inside it when he breathed.

But he was still standing.

“Papa...”

I tried to run to him, but my feet wouldn’t move an inch. I looked down and watched as the ground sucked me down like mud made of hands. Fingers curled around my ankles beneath the blood-soaked earth, holding me in place.

“Naya,” my dad said again, but his voice was wet, bubbling.

“I’m here!” I cried. “I’m here, Papa. I can't get back to you... I'm stuck and they blocked the south ridge... I tried...”

“You left,” he said gently.

The words hit my chest even harder.

“I didn’t... I didn’t...”

“You left,” he repeated.

Behind him, shapes moved in the smoke, Alpha Kade's pack warriors were dragging bodies, laughing while tearing them open. One of them lifted something round and small by the hair.

My breath stopped.

It was a head.

My father’s head.

I looked back at the man in front of me, still standing, still looking at me with sad eyes.

“No,” I whispered.

The warrior dropped the head.

It hit the ground with a wet, heavy sound and rolled, leaving a red trail. It turned until the face pointed at me.

My father’s eyes were open,

blinking.

“You’re too late,” the head said.

I screamed.

The standing body collapsed into ash.

The head rotted in seconds, his flesh melting, teeth showing, eyes sinking, and still his head spoke.

“You were supposed to protect them. You were supposed to fight with us”

“I tried!”

“You lived.”

“I TRIED!”

“Why did you live?”

The courtyard filled with different voices, accusing me, crying and calling my name.

The child, the little boy I had saved, stumbled toward me, blood pouring from his mouth, chest crushed inward. He wheezed as he crawled towards me, accusation and pain in his eyes.

My heart shattered all over again.

“I’m sorry... I’m sorry...I’m sorry...” I wailed.

He reached for me.

His hand fell off at the wrist before he could touch me.

I couldn’t breathe.

I couldn’t move.

The sky cracked open with screaming.

And the screaming became mine.

I woke up choking on my own cough and saliva...

I tore upward out of the darkness like I’d been drowning.

The room was black. The fire place had burned low. Shadows moved like living things on the walls.

They were still here.

They were still all here!! Those dead people... All of them... They were here for me!!!

“NO!! GET OFF!!! GET OFF!!! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

My hands were striking something...No...someone I didn’t know who, didn’t know where...the dream was still wrapped around my head like claws. My lungs pulled air that wouldn’t stay there.

“I couldn’t save you... I'm sorry... I tried...I TRIED...”

My voice sounded shredded.

Hands tried to hold my shoulders, I lashed out hard, nails, fists, elbows. Panic turned my body feral.

“Don’t touch me!” I screamed. “DON’T...DON’T... YOU’RE DEAD...YOU’RE DEAD...”

“Easy...easy...Naya, breathe...”

Dorian.

I knew the voice somewhere far away, but the nightmare was louder.

I kicked free from his hold and scrambled backward across the bed, hitting the headboard with my head.

The room warped, and i could see faces in the dark... I could see blood on the walls and smoke in the air.

“I can’t see... I can’t...I can’t...”

My chest locked. I could not get air into my lungs or out. My heart beat so fast it felt broken.

Then I felt another presence... It was heavier... closer...the presence felt different, it felt like pure, raw power. Commanding and raw, with terrified restraint.

Kade.

“Move,” i heard him say... not loud, but final.

“I’ve got her...” Dorian started.

“I know. Move.”

The mattress dipped lower, and strong arms closed around me and I exploded.

I fought him like a wild animal. Punching, twisting, trying to escape the trap, because in my head I was still in the courtyard and the dead people were trying to drag me down with them.

“Let me go!” I sobbed. “Please...please...don’t hold me... Don't take me please...”

He didn’t let go. Instead, he held on tightly, not crushing, not hurting.

His hold on me was unbreakable.

He locked my arms against his chest and held me through the thrashing, through the blows, through the panic. My forehead slammed his shoulder over and over, but he didn’t flinch.

“I’ve got you,” he said against my hair. “I’ve got you. You’re here.”

“NO...THEY’RE...THEY’RE...I SAW—”

“I know.”

“They’re dead... they’re dead... they’re all dead...”

“I know,” he whispered.

The word broke something open.

The fight drained out of my muscles like poison leaving a wound. I collapsed into shaking, huge, tearing sobs that hurt all the way down.

I clutched his shirt without meaning to, my fist twisted tight, like if I let go I’d fall back into the fire.

“I tried,” I cried into him. “I hid... I watched them die... I tried, but i couldn't help, so I hid. I tried...”

His grip tightened, just enough to anchor me not enough to cage.

“I know you did.”

“I wasn’t fast enough.”

“I know.”

“I left them. I betrayed them.”

“You survived,” he said, voice rough. “That is not betrayal.”

My tears soaked straight through the fabric against his chest. His heartbeat was steady against my ear. Dorian was still there, I could hear him pacing once, twice and then stopping. Giving me space while standing guard instead of intruding.

“I can still see it,” I whispered. “When I close my eyes... it’s still happening.”

“I know.”

He kept saying that.

Not to silence me.

But to stay with me.

Minutes passed, maybe even longer. My breathing slowly remembered how to work. My fingers loosened. My body stopped trying to run from ghosts.

Only then did I realize I was still in his arms.

And he had not tried to claim it.

Not once.

Not a single Alpha word.

Just holding.

Just there with me clinging to him.

And for the first time since the massacre, I didn’t feel alone in the memory.