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Time Prt 5
“You’ll always be my pack. No matter where you are. I love you like blood, you were meant to find me mi hermana, and I’ll never stop caring about you.” Her statement tells me she does know, and she isn’t going to argue about it. She’s a realist, and she knows my life won’t improve when Colton marks Carmen. I’ll be this inconvenient issue stuck in the way of Carmen’s happy ever after, and we both know she’s too spiteful to let that fly.
“I know what I have to do to ensure my own safety, and my own future. I love you too, Meds. I’m sorry.” I guess deep down I’ve been churning this over for days, knowing it’s where I was heading, but until now, I didn’t want to face it or say the words. I’ve pulled my head apart, and churned my mind in circles over this, and it all kept coming to the same blank spot I didn’t want to fill in. You have to cut the roots to let the grass fly fre
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I deserve that. I don’t know what to say to you. I’ve been a coward for days because I can’t face you. I guess we both know what’s going to happen in a week’s time. I don’t know how to say the words to you, or how to say sorry for what I’m going to do. In that one little statement he confirms my worst fears and solidifies my decision. Ripping what’s left of my shredded mutilated heart out, and stomping on it all over the floor until there’s nothing left but mess. He’s chosen to go through with marking her and this is his goodbye. His confirmation.Then don’t. Maybe just leave me alone until it’s done, and then we’ll see what happens from there. I need to go. I have to go do chores. I lie, trying to sound tough. Mentally scathing in tone, even if my body is starting to shake with the buildup of sobbing coming my way. Trembling as I try to hold it in, breathing fast and shallow. Throwing cold and snappy
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