A little calmer, she carried the tea tray through to the sitting room. Jeremy was standing with his back to the fire, his legs splayed apart, cigarette between his lips. A faint haze of smoke permeated the atmosphere.
Penny paused in the doorway, the picture striking her into immobility, it was as if she were seeing a stage set and most important of all, she knew that it was absolutely right. It was just as she had imagined it would be that afternoon when she realized her little flat needed a masculine presence and the smell of cigarette to make it complete, perfect. As suddenly as it had come, every trace of Penny's nervousness had left her. She felt curiously cool... Mistress of the situation.
"You look very....domesticated" Jeremy said, coming towards her and taking the tray from her hands. "Where do I put this?" he asked.
"Anywhere" Penny replied, happiness rising inside her in a bright frothy bubble. "On the table"
Jeremy put the tray on the table and looked up at her over his shoulder.
"Are you gonna sit or are you just gonna stand and stare at me?" he asked with a grin.
Penny simply smiled and watched his thin, long fingers curl round the handle of the little orange tea pot.
'He has beautiful hands' she thought. 'I will always love his hands'
Jeremy straightened up and handed Penny her cup and saucer. They sat down very close to each other in the sofa and drank their tea without speaking.
"That was wonderful" Jeremy said, and suddenly she was in his arms.
"Oh, Penny, darling" he whispered and rising quickly, he picked her up and carried her through to the peach colored room.
"We don't need a marriage service" she heard his voice as if in a dream. "Carrying you over the threshold makes you my wife"
Penny, eyes shut tightly, lay quietly on the bed where he had placed her, listening to his movements in the darkened room. He turned on the light and a faint light spread through the room, and now Penny could see his face, the dark shadow of his figure moving towards her.
"I want to watch you get undressed" he said, feeling her hands.
Obediently, Penny rose. She slipped her long dinner dress over her head and stood for a moment upright, a slender figure in her brief delicate underwear.
'I'm glad my figure is firm and young'. she thought. 'I couldn't bear Jeremy to be disappointed in me'
As in answer to her thoughts, Jeremy's voice came slow and husky from the other side of the room.
"God darling. You look beautiful. Beautiful" he said.
Knowing that he was watching her, Penny felt a sudden rush of shyness, and she stepped hurriedly out of her lingerie and pulled a transparent night gown over her head. She bent quickly to turn off the light, but Jeremy said :
"Leave it, Penny. The light on you is so lovely."
The shyness remained with her as she walked slowly towards the bed and slipped in between the smooth linen sheets beside him.
The embarrassment was hideous.
"Are you alright?" Jeremy asked.
Penny conjured up brightness to cover the oceans of humiliation. "Yeah I'm fine. I'm just really really nervous you know—"
The words were crushed under his mouth as he hauled her against him, his hands rough and his body hard.
"You don't have to be nervous. You are perfect" He spoke the words against her lips and his eyes blazed hot into hers. When she didn’t answer, he took her mouth, his kiss rough and demanding. His movements were jerky and unsynchronised and yet the desperation in his touch was more erotic than any of the smooth, choreo graphed movements of their previous encounters. The hands that dug into her hair shook slightly, and when he yanked at her nightie he fumbled in his desperation to strip her naked.
"How does this—?" he began.. Impatient, he tore it from neck to hem and she gasped, excited and nervous at the same time.
"Jeremy—"
"I want you." His mouth was at her throat. Her head tipped back and her nerves exploded with heat. "I want you so badly …." His hands were rough as he scooped her up and deposited her on the bed but she revelled in the desperation she sensed in him.
For once, he wasn’t in control as he always seemed to be. This was about a primitive, elemental driving force that transcended everything. It was just about the two of them. And an explosive physical attraction like nothing she’d ever felt before. It felt real. It felt right.
His hands were in her hair, his hungry mouth awaking feelings so intense that she shook with the force of it. She ripped at his clothes and he helped her, his mouth still on hers as he tore it off so that she could touch him. And then he was crushing her against the bed. His fingers skimmed her body, exploring her intimately until fire licked through her veins and heated her skin. And she touched him too, fascinated by the dip and swell of muscle, by the contrast of sleek and rough.
Sounds mingled in the night air. The swish of the sea on the beach, a soft sigh from low in her throat as his touch grew more intimate. The pleasure rose to burning excitement, every part of her trembling and quivering as she writhed in a fever of anticipation.
And then he was above her and she sobbed in desperation as she felt the hard heat of him against her. With a single thrust he filled her and she gave a sharp cry of shock because it was so much more than she’d anticipated. Holding herself tense, she was aware of his harsh breathing, of the tension in his powerful frame as he forced himself to hold still.
"Penny—"
"I—I’m OK … it’s OK. It's just been so long" she said. But she was afraid to breathe. She closed her hands over his hips. "Don’t stop. I don’t want you to stop …."
His head dropped to her shoulder and he paused for a moment, buried deep, his breathing unsteady. Then he lifted his head and his eyes burned into hers.
"Look at me." he said. And she did.
Holding her gaze, he lowered his head and kissed her gently, seducing her mouth with slow, practised kisses until her whole body was shivering."Relax, sweetheart …" He murmured the words against her lips, holding himself still as her body melted around him, until she was moaning and quivering. Then he started to move, slowly at first, infinitely gentle as he taught her what her body could do.It was overwhelming. Like nothing she’d ever experienced or imagined."Jeremy—" Her voice broke and he slid his hand under her hips and drew her against him, controlling her pleasure.The excitement was fierce and hot, clawing at her as he increased the rhythm, and she met each driving thrust with wild abandon. It was wild and crazy and the climax hit like a violent storm. As it crashed down on them, Penny clung to his slick shoulders, shattered by the violence of the emotion that swamped both of them.-------
"Hello —what's the time?" he asked."Seven fifteen" Penny told him. "I have brought you a cup of tea"Jeremy sat up. Completely unselfconscious, he stretched his arms, rubbed his chest, and grinned at her like a school boy."Gosh! I feel good" he said. "Darling, put that cup of tea down and come here".Obediently, Penny placed the cup on the bedside table and sat down beside him, pulling her dressing gown across her knees"Modest little sweet, aren't you?" he said, still smiling. But before she could answer, he pulled her against him with a quick gesture and kissed her on the mouth. Then he held her at arms length and said :"Let me look at you. Yes, you are still as lovely as ever. Some women look ghastly in the morning... You both look and smell beautiful""I've just had a bath" Penny replied, but she was thinking : 'I was right.
Long after Jeremy had gone to the office, Penny remembered those words. They cast a shadow over her happiness. His attitude towards age worried her. She could never be satisfied to accept a statement without proving into it. And Jeremy's emotions were already part of her life. She was wise enough to know that a man who wants to stay young forever is usually one who avoids ties, responsibilities and the thought of settling down.Then she remembered that Jeremy had asked her to marry him, at least to become engaged, and the shadow lifted. Only the disturbing impression remained.-----------------Penny was too busy during the morning to think of anything but domestic problems. As soon as the flat was clean she joined the queues and by lunch time had completed the shopping. In spite of her early breakfast, she did not feel hungry. She was satisfied with bread and cheese and a cup of coffee.That afterno
Absurd, of course, but what would he say, if he were to return now, suddenly and unexpectedly and find her here with Jeremy? Would he understand? No, he had been too young to realize what loneliness meant and he believed in woman's essential goodness. He had never been as broadminded as Jeremy. She could not imagine a Howard grown older and wiser, for he had been so young when he died. She, herself, had changed, grown up, despite what Jeremy said sometimes about her immaturity. And that first marriage was past, deep in the past. It was almost as if it had never been.Penny was preparing the white sauce for a cauliflower when Jeremy arrived that evening. She heard his footsteps outside the door, and the silence as he stopped to feel for the key under the carpet on the top step where she had told him she would hide it since he hated taking the key out because he always misplaced it. The door opened. He called out:"Hello, darling! I've got a s
Penny could not bear to hear him use that tone of voice any longer. She knew he was being unreasonable. Probably he knew it too, but he was being stubborn, so she must be the one to give in."Darling, if you really want me to, I will call Audrey and tell her. I will say I'm ill or something" she said."Oh, don't bother" Jeremy said ungraciously. "It doesn't really matter, anyway.""It does, of course it does" Penny cried, a little of her control leaving her as she realized that this stupid discussion was developing into a quarrel. She could stand most things, but not a quarrel with Jeremy."Darling, I will call her now. Audrey will understand" she said quietly.Jeremy stood watching her as she went across the room to get her phone. As she reached for it, he said :"No. Don't. I have some work to do anyways, so maybe I will just do it then, and maybe lodge at an hotel if I get too ti
"Keep still" Jeremy said. "I will rub you down. Oh, poor pet, it must have been some nightmare. You are soaking wet!""Honey, I'm so sorry... Getting you out of bed, waking you up" Penny murmured, filled with remorse."Would you like a cup of tea?" he asked."I would love one!" Penny said gratefully. "You are wonderful to me!""Like one myself" Jeremy said, grinning at her. "You stay there and try and get warm. I will be back in a moment"Penny curled herself into a ball and rubbed her feet against each other until the shivering gradually stopped. Warmth came back into her limbs and with it a rush of love and gratitude towards Jeremy. One or twice before she had had such nightmares and had lain wet and shivering until the morning, unable to return to sleep. But tonight she had him to comfort her, bring everything back to normal, to take care of her. It was lovely not be
Penny put that thought out of her mind quickly, feeling she was somehow being disloyal to Jeremy. After all, they had only been engaged a few days and there had hardly been time to discuss their future."How's the job going?" Audrey asked, breaking in on Penny's reflections."Progressing" Penny answered, not without pride. "I really have more work than I have time for at the moment. Making quite a bit of money one way and another""What are you doing with it?" Audrey asked, knowing that Penny would not resent such a question from her."Oh, shoving it in the bank for a rainy day" Penny replied laughing. "I'm bound to want a nice large bank balance sometime in my future, and apart from living expenses and an occasional dress, I don't seem to have any other requirements.Audrey did not reply, but sat smoking and thinking deeply. Although all Penny's information regarding herself and
Penny sighed. "Yes I know that" she said. "But I'm sure that once once you get to meet Jeremy, you wouldn't be so worried about this... So now please, will you tell me what has been going on with you?"Audrey smiled at her, and began to tell her about her job, and some guy from work who wanted to date her, but she wasn't sure about him yet, and Penny was glad for the change of topic.But Jeremy didn't call that night and when Audrey finally went to bed and Penny called him, he said he was too busy and wouldn't be coming home that night.He didn't return until the next day after Audrey left and he told Penny he was sorry and hoped he could meet Audrey some other time.--------------------------Two days passed and Penny realized that she felt tired sometimes. And the fatigue came suddenly especially when she hadn't even done much work. Her period wasn't late, and she was damn scared