Marriage of Loneliness

Aurelia,

"Would you like to visit my Dad at the hospital? He isn't doing well recently!" I asked Justin, Justin Windsor, my husband of six months, while staring at the avocado sandwich in my hand.

He barely looked up before answering, "Not today. I have a meeting with some clients!" He didn’t even acknowledge me as he stood up, barely finishing the toast.

"Justin..." I stood up, my voice shaky. "When can you go? Dad really wants to see you!"

He turned, his expression holding the bare minimum concern, before opening his mouth. But before he could say whatever came to his mind, his phone rang.

The faint concern I saw in those ocean-like blue eyes vanished, replaced with genuine urgency as he answered the call.

He didn’t say anything, not even a wave of his hand, just pressed the phone against his ear and walked into his study.

I stared into the void, feeling like my heart had collapsed once again, drowning in loneliness and unspeakable agony.

My marriage with Justin was an arranged marriage between two prominent families in the city. Around seven months ago, on my twenty-fifth birthday, Justin’s mother, who had attended my birthday party, proposed the match to my father.

Although I had no boyfriend and was working at my Dad’s company, marrying a complete stranger didn’t make me feel happy.

However, when I first saw him standing in that room where I was supposed to meet him for the first time, I felt an inexplicable pull toward him. As if my heart, which had barely held a few crushes on fictional characters, suddenly knew he was the one I wanted by my side.

Despite the love at first sight, I asked whether he was interested in marriage or not. He didn’t reply. All he said was that he didn’t have any ex-girlfriend, any lover, or any kind of romantic connection with anyone.

He didn’t directly tell me that he was interested in marriage. He only said he had no connections with other women.

Later, his mother and my Dad, who was barely healthy at the time, assured me that he loved his work more than dating or romance. That was why they were arranging this marriage for us.

At that time, I didn’t think much about that comment. He liked his work so much that he didn’t get time to date. After all, I liked my work a lot too.

But after the marriage, I realized that his love for work went beyond reality. In the last six months of my marriage with him, he barely looked at me. He had kissed me only once, not out of affection but to fulfill the bare minimum of what a husband should do.

He was always busy, always occupied, always somewhere else, even when he was physically beside me.

I understood then that being loyal yet emotionally absent was far worse than betrayal. It was like living with a ghost in that house, someone who existed but never truly saw me.

"My Lady!" Butler Derek, who had been my butler since I was young and had decided to move in here, called me from behind. He was holding a lunchbox with some porridge and dessert for my Dad.

"Let’s go, Derek!" I smiled through the pain, trying not to get upset.

Dad had been sick for the last two months. He had been suffering from heart disease, and nothing was working, not even a possible heart transplant.

I had been visiting the hospital ever since he got admitted.

Around ten-thirty, I arrived at the hospital. Mom and Grandma were already there, looking anxious. A group of doctors and nurses were gathered outside the ICU, their expressions wearing a mask that almost stopped my heart.

"Mom, what’s wrong?" I asked, walking toward her as she occasionally nodded at the head doctor.

The moment she saw me, tears streamed down her face. "My child!" She hugged me tightly and buried her face in my shoulder. "Your Dad!"

My heart sank. "What happened to Dad? Mom! You are scaring me!" I looked at the head doctor, Cardiologist Javed, the brilliant physician who had been treating Dad since his diagnosis.

"What happened?" I asked, my voice shaking. The color drained from my face as my mother sobbed silently. Grandma wiped her nose, but she didn’t look as devastated.

Cardiologist Javed took a sharp breath and said, "We can’t do much more. His heart is failing. It’s just a matter of time."

I couldn’t hear him anymore. The irritating scent of disinfectant, the unnecessary noise, my mother’s sobs, even the quiet heartache I had felt earlier after being ignored by my husband, everything disappeared behind one thought.

My Dad is leaving me soon.

I stood frozen, unable to process that the man who loved me as if I were his entire world, the man who taught me how to ride a bike, how to handle a project, and how to run an entire company, wouldn’t be in my life anymore.

My throat tightened. My body shook despite my arms being wrapped around my Mom. It was only a matter of time, and I knew exactly how little time we had left.

The rest of the day passed in silence. Mom stayed beside him. He occasionally tried to joke, jokes that once didn’t sound funny but now felt priceless.

He ate my porridge, one of his favorite meals. Sometimes he pressed his hand to the left side of his chest, but whenever we noticed, he pretended he wasn’t in pain.

As night deepened and I needed to leave his side, he held my hand firmly. "Sweetheart."

I tried to smile, but my tears didn’t listen to my heart. "Ye-Yes, Dad."

He looked at me with the smile that always grounded me and gently kissed the back of my hand. "You’ve grown up now. Such a strong lady you are." His smile broke as tears gathered. He rested my hand on his and whispered,

"You will always be my princess. The one who taught me that apart from money, family is everything. I hope you will always take care of yourself and your mother."

"Dad, please." Tears slipped out.

"Take over the company. It’s my legacy, and I want you to protect it." He exhaled softly and looked over my shoulder. "Seems like Justin is busy today. I hope he gets some time to visit me. Does he treat you well, sweetheart?"

I wanted to say no. That he didn’t even acknowledge me, that he barely had time for me. But I couldn’t, not when Dad always admired him, proudly saying Justin would be a loyal husband who would never cheat.

He didn’t know that loyalty meant nothing when someone treated you like a ghost.

"He will come to see you, Dad. Just a bit busy since it’s a seasonal rush," I lied through my tears.

Dad smiled and nodded. "Go home, sweetheart. Let’s talk again tomorrow. Will you come?"

I nodded eagerly. "I will, Dad. I will certainly come."

Reluctantly, I left him. Mom stayed behind, but I couldn’t shake the guilt of leaving them alone. I had to return because the company was now under my control.

When I got home and found it as empty as ever, the realization crushed me. I collapsed onto the floor, tears streaming down my face as a broken sob escaped my throat in the dark room.

My Dad might be gone tomorrow, or days later. And here, I could do nothing.

Just as my world felt like it was completely collapsing, the door behind me opened. Justin stood there, loosening his tie.

"What are you doing on the floor?" he asked, his voice cold and distant.

I looked up at him, tears streaming down my face. "Justin… Dad."

"Is there any leftover for dinner? I couldn’t eat anything. Please brew a cup of mint tea."

Saying that, he walked into the bathroom.