Alejandro
Katerina spots me just as she’s about to jump into the car. She slams the door with all the force she could muster and then kills the distance between us.“You know what?” She shouts at me, her forefinger poking at my chest. “You are such a damn douche! And if you continue like this you are going to loose everyone and die alone in your stupid big mansion, surrounded by nothing but old horses. No one will be able to stand you with this stupid attitude! You are an insufferable, rude asshole who…”Another cold, self-deprecating smirk stretches my lips and I can barely feel the pain from the cut Ricardo left there. The burn in my heart is somehow louder. So I just stand there and let her hit me again, ignoring the way even this kind of contact sparks longing deep inside. There are so many damn walls built around me and no one, not even one person has been as close as her to breaking them, and it’s… it’s so fucking hard to let her do it that I just decide to chAt the door I turn toward him, my eyes narrowed in indignation.“Just so you know, I tried,” I tell him, watching him stiffen at my words. “I won’t bother you anymore. Have a nice fucking life.”I slam the door behind me and rush to my wing of the house, red hot anger boiling inside me with every step I take. By the time I am back at my own room, I am fuming. I can’t believe I did this, that I humiliated myself the way I did for someone who clearly doesn’t feel the same. I feel stupid for even following him, for calling him earlier, for… giving a damn shit when it’s clear he doesn’t want me to.A knock at my door startles me with its urgency.“Evie, I am really tired,” I shout and head toward the bathroom when the door slams open.Alejandro rushes to me with a few long strides, wrapping his arms around me without a warning. For a second, I don’t know what to do as I stay there, frozen, my heart slamming like crazy against my ribcage.“I am sorry,” he whispers
KaterinaI haven’t been to Alejandro’s part of the house before and probably for a good reason. It’s darker here, colder, it seems lonelier and it immediately makes me feel bad, even when I know I am in my right.When I reach Alejandro’s room, my heart starts beating faster and I curse myself for it. I curse myself for calling him, for waiting for him, for following him here when it was clear he didn’t want me to do any of those things. Yet, I knock on his door and wait for him to show up, excited and nervous like a school girl.He takes his time opening. I can hear him slowly walking to the door, then taking his time with the handle. There’s something in his eyes when he sees me in the hallway, a flash of vulnerability he’s too quick to hide behind his usual wall of grumpiness.“What?” He grumbles, shifting his eyes away from mine and sighs impatiently.“Well, hello to you too,” I reply with a shrug and push him out of my way as I walk into his room uninvit
Katerina“Just don’t let him take you off your centre, babe,” Eva tells me thoughtfully.My heart skips a beat at that, because she’s right. I am off my centre. With this push and pull I’ve got going on with me and Alejandro, I don't know what I am doing. The truth is I like him, i really do, and him acting the way he does, all open and vulnerable and open at one moment, and a complete ass the next gives me whiplash. It only makes me think more and more about him, every waking hour of my life consumed by him. Which couldn’t be healthy. It’s not who I am either. I don’t go head over heels for guys, at least I’ve never done it before. Maybe I am coming down with a flu or something. Yeah, maybe that’s the reason I am feeling like this. Lost and confused, and fucking pining over someone who doesn’t deserve it most of the time.I don't find him in the study though, neither is he in the garden. I walk around the entire house but he’s nowhere to be found. Cursing under my
Katerina“So, that happened,” I sigh and take another sip of my homemade wine I just received through mail. Thank god for my stepdads mom and her wine making wisery. The steep taste burns through my throat, bringing back memories of me and Eva sneaking into grams’ basement in the summer and getting drunk on half a bottle like the lame teenagers we were back then.I am sitting with her right now in my large bedroom/apartment, because that big it is, and mope about everything that happened during my unfortunate trip to the mainland with my step-brother dearest. Do I have my new priest friend here with me to hear all about my sins even if we are not even from the same religion? Sure, I do. Poor Manuel is blushing like a damn virgin as it is, and I know I should feel at least sorry about what happened or what comes out of my mouth, but I honestly don’t. After all, Alejandro and I are consenting adults and whatnot. Plus, I am still mad and I need to vent.“Girl, I leave you alone for less
Katerina “You can be an asshole, if you want to,” I finally say, my voice too loud for my ears in this moment. “I am one too, so I know how to handle you, remember?” He laughs at that, finally laughs, his dark hooded eyes finally lighting up a little. And then we go to the beach and Alejandro grunts and huffs the entire time, but then I see him staring dreamily at the ocean before moving to fix our towels right there on the sand, joking about my complaints for the lack of sun beds. Of course, I am not serious, and neither is he, and somehow the sunny day feels even lighter. We just stay there on the beach, together, talking, like we’ve never talked before, about everything and nothing. About my work at the bank and his struggles with the estate, about his mother. Ana Elena. When he talks about her, sipping from his virgin cocktail, the breeze whipping his hair away from his face, he gets this dreamy, blissful expression and I wonder, for the first time in my life, how it must fee
I carefully leave my fork next to my plate, keeping quiet. I am not sure he realises he’s telling me this, to me, his supposed enemy. I already suspected it after last night’s fight, but I wasn’t sure. And I never, not in a million days, expected him to share that truth with me of all people, especially not in this casual, it-doesn’t-matter way. But he did and I don’t know what it means now.“Pathetic, right?” Alejandro gives me one of his unhappy smiles, and of course it doesn’t reach his eyes so he tries to hide from me again.By instinct I reach out and grab his hand and it startles him, but at least he’s not moving away, or telling me to fuck off so I’d take it.“It’s not pathetic. What’s pathetic is leaving your kid to fend for themselves.”“That’s why I will never have children…”“Yeah, me neither,” I shrug, my nose wrinkling at the thought. God, I’ve never said that out loud to any man I’ve ever been… hooking up before, but then again, neither of them has