Confessions of a lover

“Now, when we enter this house, speak and make your way up the stairs. Do you understand?”

My auntie Stacy spat as she guided us from the car to a building that appeared somewhat rundown.

“Who place, auntie?” my brother asked, looking around.

“This is where I live. It’s Denny’s sisters’ building, but this is where I stay now,” she replied, opening the door.

As we stepped inside, we were met with music and a crowd laughing and dancing .

“Are they having a party?” I asked, taking in the atmosphere.

“Hey Marie, this is my niece and nephew. I told you about earlier,” she said, completely disregarding my question in her overly friendly manner.

“Hey, y’all can call me Auntie Marie or just Marie,” she said without looking up at us.

“Yes, ma’am,” I replied, observing everything happening around us—people playing cards, dancing, and talking.

“Hey, you don’t have to be so polite,” she chuckled. “Marie or Auntie Marie works just fine.” She said eyes wide as she finally looked up at me. “Go on back there with the other kids and have some fun.” She said, turning her attention back to the card game in front of her.

“They’ll settle in first. They can play with them a bit later,” Stacy said, guiding us out to the stairs.

“Listen, don’t get y’all selves into no trouble trying to be like them other kids,” she cautioned, looking at me.

“Now, I’ll let you play downstairs, but please stay out of the grown folks’ face and don’t leave this house,” she said, unlocking the door.

“Come on, so you can put your things away and I can take y’all back down,” she said. Pointing to a room. “Yall can share this room.” She say pushing us in.

We quickly unpacked our suitcases and put our things in the room as Stacy went over the rules again.

“Hey Mae, this is my niece and nephew. Give me a minute. I’ll be to your room in a second,” she said stopping a girl going down the stairs, and pushing my brother towards the kitchen.

“Go back there with the boys. They’re playing some game,” she said, waving him off.

I observed everyone engaged in their own worlds—some playing cards, others dancing, and a few talking.

“Come on, Ki, follow me,” she says as she knocks on a door. “Mae, this is my niece Ki. She’s not much younger than you. Can she sit here with you? I’m meeting Denny for a while.” She pushes me forward, not even waiting for a response before walking up the stairs.

“Yeah, that’s cool. Hey, I’m Mae,” she says, gesturing for me to come in.

“How old is you?” She asked leading me to her room.

“14. How old are you?” I respond.

“17. Why you talk like that?” she asked, her face twisted up.

“Like what?” I ask, confused.

“All proper or whatever. And why do you dress like that?” She said grabbing at my shirt.

“Like what?” I ask, looking down at my jeans and Minnie Mouse shirt.

“Like a little kid,” she says, laughing.

I hold my head down, embarrassed, not knowing what was wrong with what I had on.

“Come with me,” she grab my hand and pull me out of the room. She stops at the table where Marie is sitting and leans over, whispering something while pointing at me. I couldn’t make out what was being said, but Marie smiled the biggest smile. She tossed her cards on the table, got up, and told me to follow her.

Away from all the music and people, Marie asks, “What size do you wear?” holding up a bags for Mae to choose.

See, Marie was a booster who had all the latest clothes, shoes, and jewelry. She always looked stylish, with manicured nails, styled hair, and a ring on each finger.

“Um, I think…”

“You think, girl? Come over here and let auntie look at you,” she says, grabbing and turning me. “Okay, that’s a medium, so we’ll put you on a small and pants?” She says, looking at me.

Embarrassed, I look down at my baggy jeans and say, “I don’t know.”

“Turn around right quick,” she says, looking at my tags. “Okay, 12, so that’s what a medium?” she says, handing me clothes. “Now go in there and try on this stuff.”

As I stand in front of the full-length mirror, mesmerized by the clothes auntie Marie had chosen for me, I hear her urging me to hurry up. I finally come out wearing a white and red off-the-shoulder halter top that barely reaches my belly button, and a pair of blue fitted jeans with rips below the back pockets and on the thighs.

“Come on now, let Auntie Marie see her work,” she says as I walk out, arms crossed and covering my chest.

“Oh, baby girl, you’ve got body!” Mae teases, causing me to blush.

“Okay, now your hair,” Marie says, looking at my two braided ponytails. “Is this all you?” I slowly shake my head, nodding.

“Mae, go get the gel brush and flat irons,” she orders as she sits me down on a crate. “Auntie gone get you together. She said taking down my braids.

After what seemed like hours of playing dress up, I sat looking at myself in the mirror, smiling, turning, and posing. I had never seen myself look like this.

“Okay, let’s go outside,” Mae says while applying lip gloss to her already shiny lips.

“I can’t,” I say, dropping my head.

“And why not?” Mae yells at me.

“Stacy said…” I begin.

“I got Stacy, you’re okay, baby girl,” Marie says, turning me and admiring her work. “Go show off for me, and when people ask where yo gear came from, just tell them Auntie Marie.” She said laughing.

“But…” I start to say.

“But nothing, I’ll tell you what. Run to the Sto’ and get me a Pepsi with Mae,” she orders walking back up the stairs.

Before I could say anything, Mae grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the front door.

“Let’s go.” She said dragging me behind here.