Conversion Camp

"No... no! No! You guys lied to me!"

I screamed when I saw the large sign in front of us: "Conversion Camp." There's no way they're trying to convert me into boringness!

"You said we were going camping! Not... converting shit!"

My parents just looked at me with disappointed expressions, still chatting with some stupid-looking priest. Dressed in a white robe, pretending to be a saint. Yeah, right. You can't fool me!

"Look, I'm not doing this," I said, throwing my hands in the air with a dramatic "I can't believe this" expression as I started walking toward the car.

"Not so fast, young man," a deep, annoying voice called after me. Of course, it's the priest. I can spot a saint-wannabe from a mile away.

"Oh yeah? Well, try and catch me!" I shouted, sprinting toward the car.

Unfortunately, my loving, adorable, cute parents had locked the car. Now I looked like an idiot, trying to force open the door. I probably looked like a carnapper for fuck's sake.

"Adrian, stop it. You're homeless until you go into this camp!" my father said firmly, and I had no choice but to let go of the door handle.

It's only been a week since I came out to my parents. A week that changed everything. They've always loved me... until I told them I'm gay. Now their affection vanished like smoke in the wind.

Everything they gave me before- my freedom, my gadgets, my life was gone. They said it was for the best. The internet made me gay. My friends made me gay. I needed to be away from all things "gay-inducing."

And now they've betrayed me again. Sending me to this stupid conversion camp?! What am I? The devil? If so, these people will be banned from hell because I never want to see their faces again!

I stepped back and glared at my parents. They avoided my gaze. I could feel the disappointment stretching like a canyon between us. They disown me just for being myself? Unbelievable.

Oh well. I'm on my own. I don't need them anyway.

"Don't ever come back here," I said firmly, without looking at them, as I stormed toward this hellish camp. Goddamn it! I'm allergic to straightness.

As I walked angrily, footsteps echoed beside me.

"It's pretty normal to have arguments like that with your parents," said that saint-wannabe priest voice again.

"Normal, my ass. I'm not staying here long," I rolled my eyes at him and I can sense that he didn't like what I did one bit. Well, fun fact: I don't give a shit!

"You have to open your heart and let the Holy Spirit-"

"Stop right there, Mr. Father-in-Church. I have no intention of listening to your preachings. Just show me where I should stay." I cut him off mid-sentence; the endless accept this, accept that, be with him, believe in blah blah sermons were enough to make me lose it.

He didn't say a word this time, only pointed toward a medium-sized cabin.

Ohhh... it actually looks nice and big. Just my type. Rawr.

I practically skipped my way to the cabin like it was my honeymoon suite. Who knows? Maybe this camp is crawling with gays in desperate need of "conversion." Maybe I'll even meet my one true love here. Wouldn't that be ironic?

Parents: 0

Adrian: 1

The moment I pushed open the door, my eyes landed on the two beds set side by side, not too far apart.

"Oh, fuck yes," I whispered.

I have a gay roommate! Yes!

I hope he's a top. I'm not topping bro, I'm a pillow princess until I die.

I dropped my bags dramatically beside the bed I claimed, then flopped down onto the mattress with a sigh worthy of a telenovela finale.

Sure, I still couldn't believe my parents had dumped me here, but hey, there's no way in hell I'm getting converted. If anything, I'll be the one converting everyone else. By the time I'm done, this whole camp will be a pride parade. All for one, one for all, gay and fabulous.

I raised both hands in the air and flipped off the ceiling.

"Fuck you, Conversion Camp!" I shouted.

Then I started throwing random middle fingers at the walls, at the floor, at the lampshade. Is this what they call the revenge of the gay?

That's when the cabin door creaked open.

And holy. Shit.

The guy who walked in looked like he was sculpted by horny angels. Muscular, broad-shouldered, jaw so sharp it could cut glass. Definitely a top. My prayers had been answered. Hallelujah.

I didn't even realize I was still holding my middle finger up... right in his face.

He blinked, then raised his own middle finger back at me with zero hesitation.

"I hate you too," he said, voice deep and smooth like sin.

And just like that, I melted. Instant drool. Don't ask if the drooling is coming from my mouth or somewhere else.

I lowered my finger, grinning like an idiot. Clearly, he was pretending to hate me. Everyone loves me. Everyone. Especially if they're gay. Wink, wink.

"I'm Adrian," I said cheerfully, holding out my hand for a shake while staring at him like he was the main course.

He glanced at my hand, scoffed, and ignored it. I raised an eyebrow and pulled it back. Excuse me? How dare he?

"I'm not friendly," he said flatly.

"Hello, Not friendly. Nice to meet you," I shot back mockingly.

He gave me a fake laugh, then turned his back and flopped down on his bed.

He doesn't look gay, honestly. Maybe he's in denial? Maybe he came here to change? Oh, hell no. We're not converting this fine-ass man. That's a crime against humanity.

"So what-"

"I'm Damian. Now shut the fuck up," he snapped, sounding like he had a migraine.

Maybe he's just bottling up his feelings. Poor guy. Been there, done that. Zero stars. Don't recommend.

"Look, I'm just trying to be nice. You don't have to be a total jerk," I said, rolling my eyes. It's true, I'm not trying to fuc- okay, fine! I was just trying, okay?

"Let's at least get to know each other. We're roommates in this hellhole," I added, hoping to thaw him out a little.

Nope. He shoved in his earphones and tuned me out completely. Wow. Rude. I should've kicked him out the moment he walked in. Boring as hell.

Feeling ignored, I stared up at the ceiling. The cabin walls were plastered with Bible verses and cheesy slogans like "You're not broken, just confused." Yeah, right. If I don't lose my mind here, it'll be a miracle.

Just then, the door creaked open without so much as a knock. Excuse you?! Ever heard of basic manners?

"I'm glad you both are settling well," a beautiful nun stepped inside. For a second I thought it was a guy. Nope. Just a nun who didn't get the knock first memo.

"Yes, Sister. We're good," Damian suddenly spoke up using the softest, most polite voice ever. I blinked.

Oh, so she gets the nice voice, but I get the "shut the fuck up" treatment? Rude. The discrimination is crazy.

"First thing tomorrow, you'll both be up by six for morning exercise. No excuses, no lateness. Understood?" she said warmly, giving us a smile I couldn't tell was genuine or fake.

"You can count on us," Damian replied with an actual smile before she left.

I stared at him. Was this man actually trying to get converted? Cute. Tragic, but cute.

"Bro, even if you're into her-which, spoiler, you're not, she's a nun. She's not gonna let you hit," I said with my arms crossed.

Damian shot me the most confused look.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" His irritation was back.

"We're gays! Let's just accept who we are," I declared like the brave hero I am.

The expression on his face looked like I just farted in church. Pure disgust.

"What the hell, bro?! I'm straight!" he shouted.

My jaw hit the floor so hard no doctor alive could fix it.

"You're STRAIGHT?!!"