Chapter two

A gentle breeze silenced any cloud dreaming of rain. The clean scent of wisteria, Hyacinth, freshly mowed lawn and the cool night breeze calmed Becca's senses.

    She closed her laptop where she'd been helping her sleeping best friend, Lysandra Hawkins, with her poems.

    Two years living with Liz was as fun as it got. Their two bedroom apartment was located at the middle of oakfalls. It offered night long parties, bars and restaurants which we both visited once in a while.

    She scowled at Liz's sleeping form which was sprawled on the bed. so much for waiting for me, she thought wryly.

    She stood up and all her muscles screamed profanities at her brain for using them too long. Bending, she picked the duvet Liz had managed to kick off the bed and covered her properly.

    Walking to the small kitchen which also served as the dining room, she massaged her neck and picked a clean glass to drink water.

    She leaned against the island and took in the night view through the open window that was facing the sink. A potted Hyacinth bloomed cheerily by the window sill.

    Sometimes, she wished for Liz's life and easy going, carefree attitude she knew she would never possess. Tonight, she just wanted to sleep. Wanted sleep that promised revitalization of her brain and meaningless dreams.

    Sighing deeply, she switched off the light, opposing the idea of leaving the window open. As she moved towards it, a shadow darted past, anxious not to be seen and dismissed as a trick of the dark.

    Frowning, she stood by the window and saw a figure moving stealthily away, blending with the shadows the street lights ignored

    She shut the window, flipping the latch and walked to her room, dismissing it as a late night runner. But she couldn't dismiss the dread and the taste of weariness in her mouth as she climbed up her bed and put out the light besides it.

    "I've got your breakfast here. If you'd eat more, you'd have more flesh on your skinny body. You're all skin and bones." My mother tutted behind the frying pan, dishing out pancakes while I sketched an image I'd seen before I'd slept. It was mostly shadows and street lights not quite scaring them away. A figure was caught darting away in the picture.

    I pushed my food around, not feeling a bit remorse about the death of some bozo I'd seen or had probably glimpsed . I didn't even think much about it due to the simmering anger in my belly.

    My mother sat close to me, noting with keen eyes, my lack of appetite. Her smile slipped a notch or two which silently pleased me. She placed her hands on mine and I snatched them away. Sighing, she said , "when are you going to talk about what happened or at least, yell at me?"

    Stung into response, I replied in a very acidic tone, "what good will it do? Huh? Yelling at you is like yelling at nothing or letting me go through that night again. Do you know how I felt, Mother?"

    She cringed."I.. I thought that if I ignored you, I could ignore the pain and sorrow I felt every time I saw you. I'm sorry, Ann and sorry won't take back what I did but I'm so sorry."

    I gave a cynical laugh, so harsh and bitter, I was startled. A sixteen year old wasn't supposed to have that laugh. But then, nothing about me was normal. Anger spilled and laced my words like vines. "sorry!? Sorry doesn't even qualify for what happened, mother.. I felt crazy! I wanted you to tell me it wasn't my fault or comfort me! You let be, let me cry every night for my lost innocence".

    She blanched and I drew a deep breath. "Buying smoothies, cooking breakfast and giving smiles won't change anything, Mother. Might as well go on ignoring me because I'm used to it."

    I grabbed my bag and stormed off taking an apple with me. I saw a few tears roll down my mom's face and I hated myself even more.

    She hastily wiped her face and opened the car where I stood waiting for her to drive me to a school I didn't want to attend. The truth hurts, mum. It's blunt and painful and it's just what you needed, I said inwardly.

    The relief I was feeling from yelling at her was fast diminishing as my mind casually strolled to my 'extended' family. They were really extended, I thought drily. It brought me back to mother, the woman who ignored me for five years, passed me like a stranger day and night those five horrible years any eleven year old shouldn't have.

    The woman who had entrusted me with baby sitters and nannies for five years. Who'd sent me to a shrink!! I scowled at her head, wishing I'd said more hurtful things.

    The car drove past our mansion but one window in particular caught my interest. The window that had caused everything! The window that had brought the death of  Oakfalls most loved man. CEO of the largest clothing line and one of the top five in New York.

    Grimacing, I inwardly said, really feeling the love, I thought with as much sarcasm I could muster.