8

Ingrid was happy and getting used to being alone at home. Of course, she also felt a bit of sadness because she missed her cousin, especially now that she was the only one doing Zumba in the living room when she got home from work. But she was enjoying her solitude. She turned up the volume of her smart TV speakers because she had no neighbors to disturb. The unit she was renting was at the end of the building, and the one next door had been vacant since yesterday. It made her even more motivated to dance.

She also decided to buy gym shorts and a tank top next time to wear while doing Zumba. Usually, she wore leggings and shirts with sleeves, even though Pat always teased her that she had nothing to hide because he was her cousin and, most importantly, he was gay. It's just that she wasn't that comfortable exposing a lot of her skin to other people.

When she tried wearing a mini-skirt, her boyfriend at the time scolded her. She looked like a slut and a cheapskate, even though the denim skirt wasn't super short. He even threatened to break the face of any man who looked at her legs. She just changed clothes before they went out so they wouldn't fight. She also received a sermon from her parents because of that. They said she was a woman and should respect her body, that no one would respect her if she dressed vulgarly. They said her body should only be shown to her future husband.

Just wow! She was more like a naked parader at that moment because of the judgments she received from the people closest to her. And seriously, for her, clothes are clothes. She had always dressed modestly because of her family's influence and because it had become her preference. But sometimes, she also wanted to wear clothes that she didn't usually wear. She always thought she had this daring side of her that she wanted to unleash from time to time; she just never had the chance.

Ingrid turned off the TV when she heard her smartphone ringing on the sofa; Pat was calling.

"Patrick, how many times do I have to tell you that I'm okay?" she said to him, laughing and annoyed, when he asked how she was doing. "It's been a week, hasn't it? I'm still alive."

"I'm just worried about you, dummy! You've never been alone, have you?"

"Yup. And I'm enjoying it right now, believe me."

Pat laughed. "Wow, if I didn't know it was our Zumba time now, I'd think you were in the middle of having sex; that's why you didn't answer my call right away, and you're panting now."

"You're such a rude gay!" She collapsed onto the sofa and wiped the sweat off her face with a small towel.

Her cousin laughed louder. "Just saying."

"Who would I even have sex with? No one likes me," she said with a pout. "Besides..." She decided to be honest with him at that moment and told him what she had been wanting to say for a long time. "You're always pushing me to go on dates, but you're so protective. You don't even let me go to clubs without you."

"Oh, my God!" Pat shrieked. "Did I object? I objected to the one who invited you. Sorry, I don't trust Sari, you know? She might just sell you out."

"I've only been to clubs twice, and you're always with me." Ingrid giggled. "How could guys approach me? You're so macho. They think you're my date."

"Silly! They didn't approach you because you look like you're going to church in your outfit!" her cousin teased. "You look like you just came from a christening and got lost on your way to a prayer vigil."

She laughed. "And remember the guy from accounting who asked for my number last week? You scared him off!"

"Crazy! Albert is a womanizer. I told you. Half the girls in RTA have probably been on a date with him."

"You really think I can't handle him if ever?"

Albert was handsome, charming, and sweet-talking. She wouldn't deny that she felt attracted to him, but it wasn't enough for her to contradict Pat about his objection.

"Hey, Ingrid! There you go again, huh? Guys like that have no hope of changing. He's thirty-seven but has no intention of getting married because he's enjoying being a womanizer. It would be okay if it were just one at a time, but I heard that he's also on the side with other women. So, please, don't—"

"I'm not going to go out with him, relax! Come on, am I that stupid?" she snapped at Pat.

"All I'm saying is, be careful with the people you date. Your ex also traumatized me."

"Alright."

"And, wow, huh? You've only been alone for a week, and you're already nagging me?"

Pat said it jokingly, but Ingrid could sense a bit of resentment in his voice. She understood her cousin. She came from a sheltered life where she did nothing but follow her father's and ex-boyfriend's orders. When she packed her bags and went to Manila, Pat felt responsible for her. Her cousin was just protecting her in her newfound freedom.

"Pat, I know you only care about me, but I wish you would sometimes trust my decisions. If I fail again, then so be it. At least I listened to myself, right? I have no one else to blame."

"Yeah, yeah. You've got a point."

"How's Hong Kong?" she changed the subject. She didn't want to argue with her cousin.

"Oh, my God, that. Our socialite boss got bored at the party last night and invited us to eat street food outside. We even went shopping while she was wearing a gown. Crazy!"

"Raffy is a bit weird sometimes, isn't she?"

Pat chuckled. "A bit? She's totally weird. But that's what we love about her. The Alfonsos are really unique, you know, including your boss now. Ask him sometime why he decided to be the head of RTA when he seems more suited to be a math professor or scientist."

"Yeah, he seems out of place in RTA."

So far, in the almost three weeks she had been working for Noah, she had nothing to complain about. He wasn't bossy; he seemed to trust her abilities.

She just noticed that he seemed... distant from her? The other staff said that he didn't really talk to the RTA employees for long, but he was close to Mariz. Not being talkative, she could understand. But being distant? That's what she felt, like he was deliberately avoiding her sometimes, like he couldn't stand being around her and was subtly pushing her away. He didn't have a problem with her, did he?

He seemed pleasant to talk to, though. She liked what he told her when she complained to him that she was harassed. It was very refreshing and enlightening at the same time because first, Noah was a man, and second, he was no relation to her. So, she knew he wasn't biased in talking about that issue, and he wasn't just trying to make her feel better.

"Yup. You're out of place in RTA, too. You look like an old maid librarian!" Pat teased her back.

"Why? There's no dress code in RTA, right? Raffy even comes to work in her pajamas sometimes."

"Speaking of dress, I bought you an outfit for Maverick's contract signing. Wear it, okay? It's nice, not too revealing, so don't be picky!"

"Ugh!" Noah reminded her yesterday about the event next Friday night. "Why do I even have to be there?" she muttered with a pout.

"Mariz is out, and you're Noah's assistant now. Naturally, he'll bring you there. You'll be the one giving them the papers at the table, you know? Besides, what are you talking about? This is your chance to meet Maverick!"

She had only been to two RTA events: the birthday party of their most popular local celebrity, Bela Roces, and the yearly fashion show where almost all of RTA's talents participated. She wore black pants and a blouse then.

"Fine. Okay, Pat, I'm going to take a bath. See you next week!"

On her way to the bathroom, Ingrid stopped in front of the life-size mirror attached to the wall. She looked at her entire body. Her body looked nice, she thought. No excess fats. Her legs were long and shapely. Her skin was smooth and fair. She touched her chest when her eyes wandered there. They were firm and round; her bra size was thirty-six C. She wanted to think she was sexy, but that word seemed to have a stigma for her because of where she grew up.

Why was it such a big deal to other people if women wanted to be sexy? If they wanted to show too much skin?

She let out a lopsided smile and began removing her clothes in front of the mirror. She looked at her nakedness, reminding herself that there was nothing to be ashamed of in her body. She realized lately that every inch of her body was hers, hers alone. She was the only one who could decide who could see or touch it. She wasn't a gift; she wasn't a decoration. She was the only one responsible for her body, not other people. She was made that way, and if other people had problems with it, then to hell with them, right?

Ingrid traced her neck with her fingers, slowly trailing down to her chest. It had been a while since she had been touched, and she would admit that there were times when she was missing that kind of heat. But, surprisingly, not from the only man who gave it to her.

Having sex with Eric was not something that she could call hot and, well, sexy. She felt like he just used her, took advantage of her. She felt like she gave herself to him out of her so-called 'obligation' as a woman, as someone who loved him. That was the reason in the first place why she agreed to have sex with himㅡEric asked her to do it out of love. And it was all but crap. Ingrid knew that despite her trying to deny it, she loved her boyfriend back then.

But since they broke up and she moved away, she gradually realized that her sensuality wasn't awakened, even though she wasn't a virgin anymore. She started reading books and watching documentaries, and erotic videos. And yes, she had tried touching herself, too, even though the people she knew told her it was dirty and vulgar. She needed to find out what she wanted as a woman, and she also needed to fill the heat that her body was looking for in her own way.

Ingrid's hand stopped on the mound of one of her breasts. She gently squeezed the mound, feeling the electrifying sensation. When would a man ever touch her the right way? She was longing to be touched the way she wanted it, craved it, and dreamed of it...

Until she remembered that the window opposite her in the living room was open. She screamed and ran into the bathroom.