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Dude I Kissed Your Mom!
Dude I Kissed Your Mom!
Author: quyvozi

Chapter One .

Author: quyvozi
last update Last Updated: 2024-03-23 21:18:14

"Hey Abigael, did you gain weight?'Cause those jeans make your ass look fatter than Nicki Minaj's,"

That statement ushered in a wave of laughter that rippled through the sea of students in my Calculus class.The aforementioned girl pulls the hem of her knitted grey sweater down her torso in an attempt hide her overly exaggeratingly huge butt to no avail,which only seemed to fuel the laughter of the ruthless crowd. With flared cheeks and a sharp glare, Abigael sags down to her seat before burying her face inside a Math book. 

"Gosh, you are such an asshole,"Not everyone was flattered with my idea of a joke as Hazel's glare pierced me like cupid's arrow as she reprimanded me for that insensitive comment aimed at Abigael's behind. 

"What, her butt is gigantic!" Another storm of laughter tore through the class like a tornado which abruptly subsided once the classroom doors burst open. The smirk that had decorated my face slowly dissipated as my gaze followed the graceful aura of Mrs.Dawson as she sauntered inside the room. The clicking of her stilletos against the marbled floors echoed throught the quietened room that held its breath in anticipationof the knowledge of today's Calculus lesson. The neutral expression that adorned her face was the perfect giveaway that portrayed her no-nonsense attittude. With her books plopped on the desk in front of her , she grabbed the whiteboard marker , uncupped it before and turned her back towards us as she wrote on the milky white board Quadratic Equations. 

I don't hesitate to lower my gaze down her frame as I silently appreciated the shape of her lush derriere hugged by her tight paint suit which triggered a devious smile upon my youthful face. 

"Okay,"Mrs.Dawson faced us, placing the whiteboard marker on her desk. "Everybody turn to page seventy four." The sound of pages rustling through infiltrated the graveyard silence that had impregnated the room. A cough is heard from a distance .The screeching of a chair against the floor follows before Mrs.Dawson clears her throat reeling our attention back to her. 

"Today we are going to look at Quadratic Equations so if you have any questions feel free to raise your hand anytime," An idea flashed across the embers of my mind. " I'll be more than willing to help." 

Her stare swept across the room and I darted curious glances around picking up an air of complete lack of interest that had hijacked every students' faces. No dared to raise their hands albeit the fact that Calculus was a boring subject.Without rational reasoning, I bit the bullet and raised my own hand.

"Yes,Maxwell,"Her attention was on me."You have a question?"

Heads turned to face me as I shared a smug look before clearing my throat to amek it sound all deep like James Bond's.

"Are you free this evening 'cause I'd like to take you out to dinner,"

As expected , a chorus of hoots and snickers rippled through the room triggered by my daring and bold question. Leaning back on my seat, a satifactory smirk on, I watched as Mrs.Dawson conjured a forced smile,folding her arms across her chest as she addressed me with her infamous judicial stare. Soon the noise would simmer down to hushed whispers as the air thickened with expected tension with me sharing a rather intense staring contest with the vivacious woman. 

"Is that all you had to ask?"She inquired, her eyes shifting to a darkened look.

"Well I mean,I'd like to discuss what type of room service you'd prefer but I best leave that discussion for when we are alone," Another round of hooting and hollering erupted mixed with pleasant surpised looks  from my fellow classmates as I punctuated that statement with a sly wink. 

It was known around school that I was a class clown,no lesson was ever boring when I was present. I knew how to liven the mood with shock factor,I wasn't scared to bring my intrusive thoughts out in the open. I'd been sent to the principal's office countless times because of it.But that didn't seem to quench my thrist for attention.This was my disease and seeing how unimpressed Mrs.Dawson was I couldn't resist the smirk from creasing my lips. 

And it didn't hurt that she was my best friend's mother.

Everybody has crushes from time to time.It is our daily bread and not a foreign idea in our developing minds.Some people crush on their boy best friend and girl best friend, some crush on their next door neighbors ,other crush on Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez , while other crush on their best friend's mothers.

I was the victim to the latter. 

It was just a simple harmless crush that I hoped would vanish like Houdini's but had stubbornly refused to disappear. Like gum it stuck, lingering by like smoke inside a chimney As of now, I had decided to take advantage of my feelings to her and toy with this woman who was easily twice my age in hopes that she would give me detention. Besides, it was my darkened desire to have a woman with power bossing me around.Who wouldn't want to have a powerful woman dominating them? 

"I will see you in detention," That was very predictable.

"I look forward to it ,Mrs.Dawson," I adopted a good boy persona as I watched the rest of the class egg me for it. With a stern look , the woman dove right back into Calculus as I envisioned on what detention would be like with Mrs.Dawson.

Like a date.

Just her and I. My wet dream come true. 

After an hour of the brutally boring Calculus lesson, the shrill cry of the bell was like our saving grace, sending students racing for the door quicker than a lion charging against its prey. 

"Remeber, the assignment should be sent to my email before midnight.Failure to do so will result in punishment,"She informed amidst the ruckus of students departing the room. 

"Maxwell,I'd like to have word with you,"Another hooting was heard from the departing students, prompting me to roll my eyes at how juvenile they sounded. Having shoved the last of my books inside my book ba, I slung it over my shoulder before approaching the teacher desk where Mrs.Dawson had settled behind. She was busy marking some tests , grading them with a red pen and I couldn't help but peek as she awarded Shane O' Brien a D minus.

You gotta study harder, Shane O'Brien.

With just us two left behind, I had to savor these rare moments between us.Who knows when I'll be alone with her like this?Sharing the same air?Except for today's detention.

Another minuted rolled by with her refusing to acknowledge my presence as she vigorously marked the tests,I found myself whistling a Chris Brown song to pass time, much to her annoyance. 

Slamming her pen down,Mrs.Dawson faced me with a critical stare, propping her elbows on top of the desk,fingers clasped, resting her chin on them.I stopped the whistling, she remained mute, a judicial look dancing inside those immaculately sapphire eyes , venomously ripping me apart, piece by piece, as she analyzed every fiber of my being. My hands slithered inside my jeans pocket, shifting my weight from foot to foot. 

"How's your father?"That was an unsolicitated question that had me blinking my eyes with confusion.

"Why would you want to know?You know darn well that he's married,"I jokingly informed with a smug look." You've seen the ring on his finger ,right?Unless he's at the bar trying his luck in scoring for potential lovers."

Another beat of silence passed between us and I watched her unmoved by my rambling.

"Are you done?'She asked.

"It depends,"I let out an exhale."are you up for a coffee date?We could talk about how crappy marriages can be, I mean, you'd know about that since you don't particularly share the same bed with your husband anymore."

That was harsh and rude and uncalled for , even by my standards but then again,as I said , I always let my intrusive thoughts get the best of me.I knew about Mrs.Dawson's painful divorce with Mr. Dawson and bringing it up was uncalled for. However, no emotion was detected in her face, not even a  glare whatsoever. 

"You know your father told me that if you ever disrespected me at any cost I shouldn't shy away from punishing you,"

"Then I guess you'd have to punish me,"

" Maxwell,"She pushed her glasses back up the bridge of her nose."You do realize that I have power over you."

"That's not rocket science,Amanda,"I watched her blink in surprise at the audacious call of her first name. 

"I might decide to fail you in this class thereby risking your chances of ever graduating and that is saying something since I know for a fact that you aren't academically gifted,"A flicker of bitterness rushed down my cosciousness before nonchalance overtook it. Who needs graduation when you've got a CEO father with a successful business venture.

"I'm sorry ,Mrs.Dawson,"I feigned remorse.

"No you're not,"her perfectly manicured hands reached for the red pen."Either way , I shall be seeing you in detention today at 4 o'clock sharp."

Having registered the fact that her white crisp shirt had its buttin halfway undone , I allowed my eyes to sneak a glance down her blouse,mesmerized by the spectacular view of her cleavage behind it. 

"I look forward to it, Amanda,"

"It's Mrs.Dawson to you,"

"Yeah , I'm gonna stick with Amanda,it sounds so much better rolling off my tongue," 

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  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Fifty Four.

    His house was still the same as I recalled during the days when I'd frequented it almost everyday after school or during the weekends. It still held its usual scent from Amanda's cleaning detergents and her tantalizing cooking. This familiar walls that held decades of memories between us four; him, his sister, Amanda and I. Memories I'd never trade for anything in my whole life and the bittersweet effect it brought me , almost bringing my eyes to tears. Tears of nostalgia. I hated the fact that I was overwhelmed with the idea of hanging out at his place, knowing how fond I was of him and his house. I hated that it made me feel vulnerable and sentimental as I slowly made my way into his room and my eyes gracefully took in the sight of what it had become. " Everything's still the same..." I remarked in a quietened tone , drinking in the sight of it and filling my lungs with the scent that dwelled within his room. His cologne and hair shampoo. His bedroom walls still boasted the

  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Fifty Four.

    His house was still the same as I recalled during the days when I'd frequented it almost everyday after school or during the weekends. It still held its usual scent from Amanda's cleaning detergents and her tantalizing cooking. This familiar walls that held decades of memories between us four; him, his sister, Amanda and I. Memories I'd never trade for anything in my whole life and the bittersweet effect it brought me , almost bringing my eyes to tears. Tears of nostalgia. I hated the fact that I was overwhelmed with the idea of hanging out at his place, knowing how fond I was of him and his house. I hated that it made me feel vulnerable and sentimental as I slowly made my way into his room and my eyes gracefully took in the sight of what it had become. " Everything's still the same..." I remarked in a quietened tone , drinking in the sight of it and filling my lungs with the scent that dwelled within his room. His cologne and hair shampoo. His bedroom walls still boasted the

  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Fifty Three.

    " You love him, too?" I didn't wait for her to take her seat at the teacher's desk in front of the class when I spoke to her. At first, she seemed clueless as to what I was alluding to, eyebrows knitted in confusion and then I repeated those pathetic words to her again, in a slow manner, almost as if I were speaking to a child. " You.Love.Him.Too?" I repeated, eyebrows corked up, waiting for her to get the reference to what I was speaking about. " And what are you talking about, you annoying brat?" She seemed comfortable calling me names as she set her books and laptop, in readiness for today's class, refusing to answer my question or at least address the issue of what I was talking about. " As if you don't know," I scoffed, folding my arms across my broad chest before leaning back on my wooden chair. " Know that you're still watching me undress through from across your bedroom window? Oh , I am well aware of your perverted tendencies," I let out another derisive laug

  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Fifty Two.

    " Your eyes....are like windows to your desolate soul..." Emerald had found her , let's call it 'calling' ,in becoming a poet , deciding to sharpen her poetry skills as she recited a love poem that she'd wrote for some dude named Oscar Smithers. Unfortunately, we were her chosen audience and everything she recited from said poem sounded extremely cheesy and cringe, I found myself wincing every now and then. " As we dance throught he rolling green pastures called love, I hope we both last forever..."Tyson groaned loudly , voicing out our frustrations as Emerald concluded her poem with a curtsy."So, what do you guys think? Was it good, do you think I should send it to him?"The hope that glinted in her eyes was pitiful , knowing that Tyson was about to extinguish it in a brutal snarky comment. " That was definitely something," Nico spoke for before anyone could voice out their opinions. " It was....unique?" Jackie added, feeding me a pleading look in hopes that I too would join her

  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Fifty One.

    "Why do you like to stare outside your bedroom window all the time?" I could see my mom's reflection through my bedroom window as she stood by my bedroom door, laundry basket full of clean clothes in hand. I was seated at my desk that was conveniently placed next to my bedroom window, continuing with the painful task of studying when I got lost in my thoughts, leaving me to gaze mindlessly outside my bedroom window. And that's when mom walked in to find me that way. " Oh," I finally turned around on my swivel chair, to address my mom who was still standing at the door. " I was just thinking about stuff. " " What kind of stuff?" She questioned with a laugh, inviting herself inside my room before making her way over to where I was seated. Her eyes immediately fell on the books I had splayed over my desk, reading through to see what subject I was tackling this evening. " Just.... teenage boy stuff," I dismissively said, hoping she would stop with the Spanish inquisition. "

  • Dude I Kissed Your Mom!   Chapter Forty Nine.

    Ten minutes had passed. I was seated in the empty classroom with two desks, one that I was currently seated on and the teacher's desk with her files placed carelessly on top, something she rarely does, the perfect indicator of her being in a rush. I was anxiously drumming my fingers on top of my desk, a made up tune on my head as I thought of every possible outcome that awaited me. I'm not going to lie but the threat of her summoning the principal to supervise me was starting to get to me like she hoped it would and I for sure thought that that was what she was going to settle on as a way of motivating me into studying. I hated principal Angerson so much. He was like a thorn in my flesh and I dreaded everything about him, to his face all the way down to the soles of his feet, even the sound of his voice was like a tormenting trumpet of doom towards my eardrums. Suppose this was her plan, to lock me up with principal Angerson for the whole day until I finished studying as a way

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