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31. Azure's morals
I had no choice. I had to tell Azure everything. Angered, he even called Toni and Tamarra so that they all give me a lecture. I’m not a kid. They shouldn’t be deciding for me. But I know they are just trying to help. They want me to be happy. But I just can’t refrain myself. It’s stronger than me.
Azure came to see me after he learned that I became a mother. Since that we became close friends. Family instead. He is an amazing buddy. Azure wants me to be happy, to get over Eren and stop mentally damaging myself because of him. He just wants me to move on. He is kinda pushy on matters relating to Eren but he is right. It’s already four years since Eren left me and I still can’t move on. I don’t even know if I will be able to love someone again one day. Azure is still waiting for me. As soon as I will be ready, I will surely try to date him. He deserves it. He does his best to stand by my side and gets along with my son. Like his father, little Eren doesn’t like
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Eren 32. Selling the memories
The next day after work, Erden came to pick me since my car was at his place for repair. Though how much I don’t want to, I’m going to show him my old house... and he will rent it along with all my memories. My heart sinks at that thought. “Y-you’re planning to move into the house?” I ask Erden curiously as we reach. My heart starts pounding wildly inside of my chest. It’s only a house Hayat. Just a house. I inhale a deep breath, trying to calm myself as I feel all my emotions climbing up my throat. Erden nods as his eyes are focused on parking the car in the driveway. “I’m living in an apartment currently. But now I’ve decided to rent a more personal house.” He explains briefly. As soon as he finished parking, Erden turns off the car and looks at me concernedly. “Look, if you don’t want to rent me the house, that’s fine.” I shake my head. “Azure is right. I’ve
Eren 33. A good father
The next day after organising my work for next week, I end up watching some makeup tutorial videos on Youtube. It’s Saturday so no work. I want to do something amusing and then when watching those videos, a crazy idea hit me. I immediately go to the salon where Eren is playing with his cars on the floor. “Um Eren.” I say and he turns to look at me, his little turquoise eyes sparkling. “Would you like to meet Erena?” I ask sweetly with sheep eyes. And this is what I did. I turned Eren into Erena. I applied some makeup on his face and put a shoulder-length wig on his head. He looks so cute as a girl, but still he doesn’t look like me. I was searching for a little dress for him in my wardrobe when there is a sudden knock at the main door. I sigh. “Be right back Erena.” I chuckle before walking out of my room. “Okie mommy!” Eren says in a girly voice.
Eren 34. Take us to the beach
After lunch, I stayed in the kitchen to clean the table. Eren has convinced Erden to play with him. So they went somewhere in the rooms. I was washing the dishes when Eren begins calling me out loud. “Mommy! Mommy!” He cries out as he appears in the kitchen. I turn to look at him, raising a brow. “Meet Erdena.” He gestures in a royally manner to the door and Erden steps in, his face overspread with makeup and a short curly wig on his head. My eyes widen and I burst out of laughter. Embarrassed, he covers his face with his hands and laughs with me. "He blackmailed you right?" I ask in disbelief. How did he let Erden do this to him? "Blackmail?" Eren repeats, fascinated by the new word. Erden shakes his head. "It was fun." He assures me and I smile gracefully. I look into his eyes and the whole world stops. &n
Eren 35. Moving in
The next day after work, I went to Erden's place with Eren to fetch my car which he has finally repaired. We also finalised the rent of the house after Erden paid me for the first month. This house officially doesn't belong to me anymore. My heart aches at that thought. But I prefer not to mourn about this now as Erden is in the same room as me, and I don't want him to question my sad mien. I've decided to help him to move in so that I can spend some last moments in this house. The abode is now a mess, bunches of cartons scattered everywhere. Trying to make myself useful, I start to remove the dvds from a box and begin to place them in a drawer of his Tv set. As I do so, one particular dvd catches my attention. The Vampire Diaries. I take it in my hand, memories flashing in my head on looking at it. Since the day Eren left, wh
Eren 36. Twenty-three already
"Happy Birthday momma!" Eren cheers excitedly as he appears in the kitchen on this early morning. His dark hair is sticking out in all direction, a large smile on his face. He dashes to me where I'm sitting at the table with Tamarra while drinking a hot cup of tea. I've turned twenty three today. How time flies by. When Eren reaches me, I put my cup of tea on the table and lean to him so that he can wrap his arms around my neck and gives me a soft kiss on cheek. "I love you so much my beautiful mom!" "Thank you my cute, Eren." Smiling back, I pick him up and put him on my lap. "This is my gift." He says, placing the piece of paper on the table to show me his drawing. I'm amazed on seeing the art he has created. It's a drawing where there is a woman holding a little boy's hand with a small house in the background and a big yellow sun in the blue sky. "This
Eren 37. The beach Spot
After locking my house securely, I slip the key in my pocket and walk to Erden as he is waiting for me on— "On Eren's bike." I burst out without thinking. Great. Your mouth really needs a filter Hayat. He slides up his tinted visor so that I can see the upper part of his face. The street lamps are casting enough light on his eyes for me to notice the sincerity in them. "I thought it would make you happy to ride on your ex-boyfriend's bike after so many years." Feeling ashamed, I bite on my tongue guiltily. "T-Thank you." Erden is just trying to help me. I'm not afraid to start something with him. I know he would make me happy and precisely, Eren. My son loves him so much and I'm sure he will be a good father to him. But I don't know why this is stressing me out. I just don't want to be with him just because he reminds me of Eren, just because he looks like him.
Eren 38. I'm his father
With tears in my eyes, heart pounding in my chest, I barge in the waiting room of the hospital with Erden by my side. There, Tamara is sitting by Toni, her head resting on his shoulder. Azure is also present, Troy sitting on his lap. They all jerk up from their chair as they notice my presence. Tamarra runs to me, her eyes flooding with tears. She reaches me and immediately throws herself in my arms, bursting into tears. "Hayat, I'm so sorry. Eren was playing with Troy and he fell from the stairs accidentally!" "It's okay Tamarra." I hug her back tightly, holding back my tears. "It's not your fault." She pulls out of the hug, wiping her tears. "What the doctor said till now?" I ask, my hand gently touching her arm. She shuts her eyes briefly. "The doctor said that because of his young age, the impact when he fell caused a head trauma. He can't say anything for sure now.
Eren 39. Your Eren is not leaving you
Eren "Goodbye...Eren." She turns and walks away. I watch her in despair till my vision becomes blurred with tears. She then disappears completely as my eyes are overflooded. It's as if somebody just stabbed me in the heart, rending me paralysed. I can't breath, I can't think, I can't live. My body feels so weak, like my soul just left it. A lump is formed in my throat as I'm about to break into tears. I inhale and exhale several times, searching to control myself but with her gorgeous face in my mind and that of our son, it's unbearable. Succumbing, I fall down on my knees and finally cry my heart out, tears deluding down my cheeks like a waterfall. I punch the ground once, twice, but the pain in my heart is still here. I punch a couple of times more, but I can't get rid of this ache. Like an injured dog, I howl my heart out in the darkness of thi
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