CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 4

EZRA

I held the note a little longer than I should’ve. My throat was dry and I was sweating through my collar, but the director nodded in approval, so I stayed focused. At least, I tried to.

We were halfway through the song when the side door creaked open.

I didn’t look up.

I didn’t need to.

I felt him.

And the second I did, my voice cracked. I coughed mid-word and grabbed my throat like it might fall off.

Lily looked over, concerned. “You good?”

“I’m fine,” I choked. “Water. I just need—”

The director waved for us to pause.

Everyone turned toward the door.

And there he was.

Father Dorian Vale.

He stood in the doorway like he hadn’t just walked into rehearsal and made my lungs stop working.

Black collar. Rolled sleeves. That same unreadable face.

“Sorry to interrupt,” he said smoothly. “I was passing by and heard the music.”

The director smiled. “No trouble at all, Father. Would you like to stay?”

“I’ll just listen. Please, continue.”

He sat in the last row.

Right in my line of sight.

Great.

“Alright,” the director clapped. “Let’s go again from the second verse. Ezra, you okay?”

“Yep,” I said. Too fast. Too loud.

I cleared my throat and adjusted the mic.

We started again.

And I could feel his eyes on me the whole time.

I tried not to look at him. I tried to focus on the harmony, the lyrics, the breath control. But every time I closed my eyes, I imagined him still staring. Calm. Quiet. Watching me come undone.

When we finished, I finally let myself glance his way.

He clapped once. 

“Very good,” he said. “The control was impressive.”

The director beamed. “That’s Ezra’s doing.”

“Is that so?” he said, eyes still on me.

I looked away. “Thank you, Father.”

He stood. “Actually, I was looking for the storage room. Father Barnes said there’s a cabinet with old hymnals. I couldn’t find it.”

“Oh,” Lily said. “It’s kind of hidden. Ezra, show him?”

Me? Of course me.

“Sure,” I mumbled. “Yeah. I’ll show you.”

He followed me out of the hall. His footsteps were quiet. I talked to fill the silence.

“It’s just past the sacristy. There’s this weird latch you have to pull before the door opens. No one ever goes there except during inventory. And sometimes they forget to restock the hymnals so—”

“Hmm,” he said.

That’s all.

Just one quiet sound.

I stopped talking.

I could feel him behind me. Closer than before. Like he’d leaned in without warning.

Heat crawled up my spine.

I turned my head just slightly. He hadn’t moved. Not really. But his presence filled the hallway like smoke.

My heart pounded.

I said nothing.

Then I moved forward, faster.

I reached the door and pulled it open.

“Here it is,” I said too quickly. “They keep all the old books and things in here. The light switch is on the right. Just watch your step, the floor’s uneven. And there’s a shelf that leans weird if you touch it so—”

I turned to look at him.

He still hadn’t said anything.

Just watched me.

I licked my lips and looked at the wall. “You can take whatever you need. I’ll just—”

I stepped back toward the door and turned the knob.

Nothing happened.

I frowned and tried again.

Still nothing.

“Oh. Uh.” I jiggled the handle harder. “It’s jammed. Sometimes it does that. It just needs a hard—”

I twisted and yanked.

Nothing.

Panic bloomed in my chest.

“Okay, that’s… fine. It’s not a big deal. I just need to—”

He moved behind me.

“Let me try.”

I stepped aside.

He gripped the knob. His hand brushed mine and I jumped like I’d been burned.

He tried once. Twice. Then stepped back.

“Locked.”

I laughed nervously. “Okay. Okay, well… someone will come by. Eventually. Right?”

He didn’t answer.

I looked at the floor. Then the wall. Anywhere but him.

The air felt tight.

He took a step closer.

I swallowed.

I looked away and knocked hard on the door. "Hello? Can anyone hear us?" My voice cracked.

Father Dorian tried the knob again. Nothing.

"It’s stuck," he said calmly, like we weren’t actually locked in a closet.

I laughed nervously. "Yeah, I figured that out."

We both knocked, louder this time.

Footsteps. Then a voice.

"Ezra?"

"Lily! We’re in here! The door’s jammed."

"I knew you took too long! I told them!" she yelled. I could hear her fumbling with the handle. "It won’t move. Wait—I’ll get someone."

I stepped back. My heart was racing too fast.

Silence filled the space again.

I could feel him behind me. 

I didn’t want to turn around, but I did.

He looked calm. 

His eyes met mine.

I swallowed hard. "Do you think it’ll take long?"

He shrugged. "Depends."

I nodded. My fingers picked at the hem of my sleeve.

I tried not to stare at his hands. I failed.

He looked down at me and stepped closer. "You have dust on your lip."

"What?" I blinked.

He raised his hand. I should’ve moved. I didn’t.

His thumb brushed my bottom lip. Slow. Careful. Like he wasn’t sure he should touch me. Like he wanted to anyway.

My breath caught.

He didn’t pull away.

Neither did I.

And then—I moved.

I didn’t think.

I just leaned up.

Pressed my lips to his.

His body went still.

His lips didn’t move.

I pulled back instantly. My heart was in my throat.

"Oh my God—I’m—I’m sorry—Father, I’m so sorry—I didn’t mean to—I don’t know why I—"

He didn’t speak.

He just stared.

My face burned. "I wasn’t thinking—please don’t report me—I swear it won’t happen again—I’m sorry—I’m so sorry—"

A sharp sound interrupted us.

Click.

The door opened.

Lily stood on the other side, wide-eyed. A man with tools was behind her.

"We got the carpenter," she said. "Apparently the latch bent."

Father Dorian stepped forward before I could move. His voice was calm. Controlled.

"Thank you," he told the man. "Please check all the doors in this hallway. Any weak locks. Hinges. Whatever needs work. Send the invoice to the church."

The man nodded. "Yes, Father."

Then Dorian was gone.

Just like that.

Mask on. Voice even. Nothing in his face.

I stood there frozen.

Lily stared at me. "What happened?"

"I kissed him."

She blinked. "What?"

I grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the hallway.

"Wait—Ezra—what do you mean you kissed him?"

"I don’t know! I just—it was quiet and I panicked and he touched my lip—"

"He what?!"

I dragged her into the bathroom and locked the door.

"Ezra!" she whisper-yelled. "You kissed a priest?!"

"It wasn’t a real kiss! It was like—half a second. I just—I panicked—"

She paced. "Oh my God. Oh my God."

"He didn’t kiss me back. He just stood there."

"Did he say anything?"

"Nothing. Just walked out like nothing happened. Like I don’t exist."

She stopped pacing. "Do you like him?"

I didn’t answer.

"Ezra."

"I don’t know! Maybe! I don’t know what this is!"

She rubbed her face. "You’re going to combust."

"Too late. I already have."

I sat on the bathroom floor and buried my face in my hands.

"Okay. Breathe," she said, squatting down. "It was just a kiss."

"I kissed a priest, Lily."

"Yeah. That part wasn’t great. But I mean… you didn’t do it on purpose. You panicked."

"My lips touched his. That’s purposeful."

"Okay, maybe you freaked out and made a choice you shouldn’t have. Doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world."

"He didn’t even react. He just—he froze. Then left."

Lily touched my shoulder. "He’s probably trying to make sense of it. Doesn’t mean he hates you."

"He didn’t say a word."

"Men don’t talk when they’re confused. He probably doesn’t know how to process it."

"He probably thinks I’m insane."

"No. He probably thinks you’re young and overwhelmed and had a moment. He’s not going to go report you to the Vatican."

I laughed weakly. "I think I broke all the Ten Commandments in one second."

"Okay. You’re being dramatic now. Come on. You need to get out of your head."

I looked at her. "What do you mean?"

She stood and dusted off her jeans. "Let’s go out. Like right now. Coffee, bookstore, I don’t care. You need air."

I hesitated. "What if someone sees us?"

"Ezra, you are not famous. And even if someone sees us, we’re not doing anything wrong. We’re just existing. You need to breathe."

She pulled me up. "Come on. Before you sink into your bed and cry into your laptop."

"I don’t do that."

"You literally did it last week."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine."

We left through the back hallway, near the side exit. The corridor was narrow and smelled like lemon floor cleaner. Lily walked ahead, talking about how she needed to get new sheet music for the Christmas concert.

I wasn’t really listening. I was trying not to think about Father Dorian.

Then I walked straight into someone.

Hard.

I stumbled back. "Oh! I’m—I’m sorry."

The man caught me by the arms gently. His grip was steady, but something about it made my skin crawl.

He was wearing priest robes. Clean. Ironed. His collar perfect. His ha

ir dark and slicked back like he’d just stepped out of a mirror. He smiled too quickly.

"No need to apologize," he said smoothly. His voice was light, pleasant… but off. I couldn’t explain it. Like someone trying too hard to sound human. He sounded so creepy.

His eyes locked on mine.

I stepped back.

He extended his hand. "I’m Father Nico."