Giving Up After the 100th Time

A chuckle came through the other side of the phone. I could hear Samantha Thompson's voice, crisp and cheerful.

"I'm so sorry, Ellena. My heart is acting up again, and Theo insisted I stay in the hospital for a few more days out of worry. Once we're back, I'll make sure he apologizes to you."

I didn't respond and simply listened to Theodore Stewart's indifferent voice.

"You're just too soft-hearted. You won't even realize it when people walk all over you. Don't take it too seriously, Ellena. Sammy has always had poor health. As for the marriage registration today, we'll talk about it next time."

Not that he forgot about our marriage registration today. He simply chose not to even text me because he was too busy accompanying the one he truly cared about.

In the past, I would have already broken down. I would have begged Theodore for an explanation in hysterics.

But now? I simply felt calm.

I coolly said, "It's fine. I'm hanging up now."

Theodore thought I'd finally learned to read the room, and even his voice was a little softer. "That's good, then. I can't leave Sammy like this. In a few days, we'll…"

I hung up with an icy expression. I glanced at City Hall with its doors shut tightly before pulling the ring off my finger, tossing the ring into the nearby trash can.

On my way home, I tapped open Samantha's Facebook profile.

Just a moment ago, she posted, [I'm hiking with the love of my life now! The boss is very busy today, but he's still willing to make some time for me! Love you!]

Then, there was a picture of them holding hands tightly, with their cheeks touching like a couple. The sunset cast a glow over them. It was a serene and perfect moment.

The comments were filled with words of congratulations.

I casually left a comment as well. [I wish you everlasting happiness.]

To be honest, we didn't even have a handful of decent photos together after all these years. I had asked Theodore to come hiking with me more than once, too. But he always smiled and said he would go when work wasn't so busy.

I had waited year after year, and he would simply wave it off if I asked him about it. "Hiking is so tiring, and I'm very busy with work. Can't you stop bothering me about something so trivial?"

Eventually, he wouldn't even entertain me anymore and simply said, "Not going."

Turns out it was not that he didn't want to hike, he just didn't want to go hiking with me.

I didn't know when, but Samantha had made all her posts public. As I scrolled down, it felt harder to breathe.

They had gone to see the beautiful snowy mountains together. They had gone to the concerts of my favorite singer and even traveled the world. Every photo of them was a record of their time together.

And all the photos dated back to when Theodore told me he was away on business or busy preparing for our marriage registration.

I was like a joke, constantly feeling touched that he was working hard for our future.

Back home, I suddenly remembered the box he treasured in his study. I remembered that I once accidentally hit it while I was cleaning the study, and he flew into a rage to the point of slapping me. After that, he forbade me from entering his study again.

I rushed into the room and started searching and finally found the locked box. The password was Samantha's birthday, and I wasn't even surprised anymore.

There was a thick stack of plane tickets and countless photos of the two together. I finally gave up and dialed my senior's number in exhaustion. "I've thought it through, Leene. I'm ready to go abroad and join the band you started."

When Leene picked up my call, she was obviously shocked before happily responding, "Really, Elle? I'll book your air ticket once your visa is approved. You finally said yes after I tried inviting you for so long."

Then her voice sounded worried. "Does Theodore know? Don't tell me you two fought, and you did this to spite him."

I shook my head. "No, it's something I want to do."

Leene let out a sigh of relief from the other side of the phone before sending me the contract after we confirmed the details. I didn't even hesitate when I signed it.

I pushed open the door to the storage room on the second floor. A thick layer of dust covered the piano in the center of the room, just like all those forgotten moments I thought of as beautiful.

The thin layer of dust on the piano keys mirrored the heaviness in my chest, refusing to be dispelled. It was making breathing difficult.

Once we had been together for a long time, Theodore grew upset with me for touring with the band. He said that the band was full of infighting, saying that it would affect me. He has been worried I might leave him.

That was merely because he and Samantha broke up in the past as she chased her dream of music overseas.

I knew he lacked security. I thought he really needed me.

I quit the band and gave up my dreams, staying at home to take care of him.

But now? I saw on Samantha's Facebook how Theodore bought out an entire venue and invited the whole company to support her concert on the day of our anniversary. I already told him earlier that I had prepared a full twelve-course meal for him and a cake, and I waited for him until midnight.

I could only feel the tears welling up in my eyes before they rolled down my cheeks.

Why was Samantha allowed to chase her dreams?

And not me?

I had once asked him and he simply said to me with a smile, saying, "You're different from Samantha."

I thought it was because I was special in his eyes.

But now, I knew the real difference. Samantha was the one he truly loved, so she had the right to live freely and do everything she wanted. But I couldn't, because I was simply a replacement, and he needed to control everything I did.

I asked the maid to help clean the piano and move it to an empty room, then I played a few songs.

The next morning, I woke up fully rested for the first time in ages.

Theodore, who was sitting on the couch, glanced at me with a hint of annoyance in his tone. "Why did you wake up so late? Are you still upset about yesterday? Why are you so petty…"

I cut him off. "I'm not angry. I just feel a little tired lately, so I shut my eyes a little longer."

"That better be it," Theodore said with a frown as he put down the phone he was holding. "It's just registering our marriage, what's the big deal? We'll pick another day. Samantha has heart issues and she's all alone here, so I need to look after her more. Don't be so childish."

Theodore's gaze sharpened as his brows furrowed. It was as if the call I made to him yesterday was something unforgivable.

Then, he slid a small plate of crab cakes from Gloria Cafe to me and said, "Breakfast. Eat."

When he saw that I didn't touch it, he stood up as his patience grew thin. "And you said you aren't upset? What do you…"

"I'm allergic to seafood."

It had been a decade, and he still couldn't remember what I liked or what I was allergic too.

My calm reply shut him down as his face flushed, panic and anxiety flickered in his eyes. Even his voice grew weaker. "I was in a rush this morning… You… Just get the maid to make you something else."

I stared at him directly, and it was enough to make him feel uncomfortable.

Then his phone started ringing repeatedly. It saved him from the awkward moment, but he glanced at me with hesitation as his fingers wrapped around the phone tightly.

I magnanimously said, "Take it. Might be something important."

I then heard Samantha's voice, sobbing and saying she wasn't feeling well. Those few words were enough to make Theodore tell her to wait as he rushed out with his coat in one hand without even looking back.

I already said that I would walk away. But it still hurt.

‘Theodore… Since you don't love me, I won't beg for it anymore!

‘I don't want to keep waiting here for you!’