Chapter 4

The gentleness on Cassian's face vanished all at once. Impatience showed in his eyes.

"Evelina, that's enough. I admit I treated you unfairly over the potion, but you don't have to make a scene just to get attention. And now you're wasting food. That bread was Lilith's way of being kind. This isn't like you."

I fought down the pain in my body and reached for him. "Cassian... it hurts so much... it's the curse... the curse is starting."

Cassian did not gather me up the way he always had. He looked down at me from above, his eyes full of scrutiny and doubt.

"Evelina, your acting has really improved. The curse doesn't take effect until the day of your coming of age. The ceremony is three days away. You'd make up a lie like this just to keep me here?"

Everything in front of me went white and started spinning, and still I reached out and caught the hem of his clothes.

"I don't know, Cassian, just stay with me, please..."

"Enough." Cassian stood up and pulled hard. My hand lost its hold and dropped limply away.

"Sit with yourself and think it over, Evelina." The door slammed shut. I lay there alone with the pain until I passed out.

When I woke again, it was already the next day. I dragged my exhausted body toward the door, only to find Cassian in the entryway, dressed for travel with luggage in hand.

"You're up?" Cassian noticed me. His tone was as flat as if last night's fight had never happened. "I promised Lilith I'd go to the Northern Forest with her for herbs. You'll be on your own in the pack for a few days."

I knew perfectly well that he was avoiding me. But what reason could I give to make him stay? He would rather believe I was acting than stay for even the one-in-ten-thousand chance that I was not.

I lowered my eyes and walked him to the pack gate. Lilith was already waiting there. "Evelina, thank you for lending me Cassian. I promise I won't let him get hurt."

Cassian walked over, took her bag without being asked, and tapped her forehead. "Who's protecting who is still an open question."

I forced my mouth into a smile. "Just come back safe."

Cassian nodded at me and walked out of the pack with Lilith.

"Cassian!" In the end, I could not hold it in. I called after him, but he merely stopped.

When I said nothing for a long moment, Cassian could not stop himself from glancing back at me, only for Lilith to push him onward. "Come on, Cassian. If we're late, all the good herbs will be gone."

I could only watch as Cassian turned away and receded into the distance. Only after he disappeared from sight did I finally look away and make my way alone to the Moon Temple.

I found the patch of weeds where Cassian and I had picked up the stones last year and stayed there a long time by myself. For a moment it felt like I was back in the days when there was only him and me.

Back then he would go half out of his mind if a branch so much as scratched my skin. He would hold my face clumsily in both hands and say, "Evelina, once I'm Alpha you'll be my Luna, and nothing will ever be able to separate us."

I thought and thought, and the tears finally came.

Nora's voice came through the mind-link, sounding almost tentative. [Evelina, the dress for the ceremony arrived. Are you... how are you?]

I noticed a wolf walking toward me and did not have time to answer her. I smiled at him instead. "You came."

It was Silas, the prodigy of the Blood Moon pack. He had awakened his wolf before he even turned eighteen and was already a strong contender for the next Alpha.

He stayed beside me without speaking, watching as I carefully lifted the half-heart necklace off my throat and buried it in the dirt.

Cassian, I don't want you anymore.

I've found the wolf who will let me live.