LOGINI'm seated on one of the benches outside. The day is nice and cool, and that's all that matters. I try my very best to not focus on Archie that is not too far from me, playing basketball. The sweat on his skin against the sun gives it a golden cast. He looks so good.
I look back at my book trying to hide the blush on my face. I blame the sun for making my face red. Archie looks at me, then his game, then back at me. I can see the lingering gaze. Almost like he wants to speak to me. Probably to tell me to stay away from him. “And what are you doing here?." I turn my head to the voice and my heart beats so fast. It's Anderson - no, Ander. I get up ready to leave, but he grabs my shoulders, positioning me in place. I try my very best not to focus on the fact that his hands are on me. Anything but that. Like the birds in the sky, or the trees or Archie's abs. My face reddens even deeper. “I'm reading. I have an assignment I'm doing research on so I ca-" “Well, I didn't ask you.“ Ander let's go of me and goes to sit beside me. We're both staring at Archer who's staring right back at us. I can see the look he's directing to Ander. I don't know what it means, but I know it means something. I don't ask though I'm very curious. “My mother was sent back to the asylum." Ander starts speaking when I'm sure we're going to sit in silence. “Her clinical depression. I guess drinking and pills don't really do it." “I'm sorry." It's too late for me to realize that's a wrong choice of words because he cracks a wicked smile. I've seen it too many times, I know what it means. “So you do know what you did was wrong. That's why you're apologizing? Get up let's go." “Where? I have another class so I can't go far." Ander turns to me and takes a handful of my hair. No, he doesn't grab it, he gently massages it. Archie's always told me my hair is soft. “Remember Andrez. Vicky or whatever the fuck you call yourself, when I ask you for your opinion, you render it. Shut up otherwise." My mouth shuts immediately. His hand is in my hair for a few more seconds before letting it go. Ander has always been a passionate person. Whatever he did radiated that passion. I can see it now as he's looking at me. He's always looked at me like I'm the most precious thing in the world. I nod. “I'm sorry." And like a switch was flipped, the look is gone. He smiles at me and mouths, “Good boy." I smile too, my sole reason being because he started it first. "Okay, let's go.“ I shove my books in my bag and let Ander lead me. We don't get far because someone is calling after him. We turn and I see Archie running towards us. His hair and clothes are going along with the wind as he runs. I see why he's the star student. Hot and charismatic really does it for some people. And I'm proud to be some people. "Where are you taking him?“ He asks, reaching us, not even out of breath. I know I would've passed out if I was asked to cover his distance in the time he did. I'm in the middle of the siblings just like before. Ander looks at his brother annoyed. "Learn a thing of two about minding your business Archer. Weren't you playing with your friends?“ Ander pulls me ready to leave, but Archie holds my other hand. "Where are you even going Andrez?," I want to answer the question but Archie turns his gaze away from me and back to his brother. “Does he even know where his going? What do you think your plan is?“ Ander smirks. "What do you think my plan is? You know, I'm not in the mood for you right now, just stop getting involved. Being nosy doesn't fit you.“ Archie looks at me, then whispers something into his brother's ear. I'm too short to hear them. Either that or Archie is a good whisperer. Ander looks at me too, then lets go of my hand. My book bag falls to the ground, and like an idiot under scrutiny, I pick it. "Go to your class. My brother and I have something we're going to discuss,” Archie says. I can see said brother doesn't want to have the conversation. I nod and walk away, still feeling the Matheos brothers eyes on me. My class doesn't start for another 44 minutes, so there's more lounging around to to do. I contemplate going back to my room, but once I go back, I'm not coming out. I decide to get a drink and sit under one of their indoor umbrellas. It's dumb to have umbrellas indoors, but I'm not the one making profit off the aesthetic. My mind is buried deep into my jeans collection, that I don't hear the person sitting opposite me until they are tapping me. I raise my head, horrendously embarrassed. It's Timothy, not smiling at me. I've noticed he's not really expressive with his face. Either a stiff smile or a poker face. No in-between. “Hey." He slides a box of doughnuts my way. I pick the one it rainbow sprinkles and thank him. “You know the Matheos duo?" He asks. Unlike others who asked me out of jealousy, he sounded terrified. I shrug. "Something like that. It's not like we're close or anything.“ There's relief on his face. I open my mouth to ask why but he's talking again. "It's good. Let it be like that. They're not nice people. I don't even know who's worse. Archer or Anderson.“ I'm quiet. There isn't anything my brain has given me to say. It's quiet too. This information Timothy is giving me isn't news. I know, but, there's no way for me to respond to him. I don't have to because Aubrey, Charis and Zee spot us and holler at us. It's unnecessary because they still come to us. "You will never believe what happened to me today,” Aubrey says, not even answering mine and Timothy's greetings. “I'm pretty sure it's believable. Try us," Zee responds. Aubrey shots him a glare but then rolls her eyes. “Well, I just got informed that the film department will be in collaboration with the journalism students. We're doing some stuff blah blah blah. But guess who's the leader of their team. Anderson Matheos." She's squealing after saying this. Only Zee gives her the reaction that matches her energy. Charis gasps, Timothy is indifferent. My mind is racing because that means I get to see more of Ander. “10 volunteers were needed, but don't worry, I've already signed us up. Timothy, Vicky and me. Yay." I'm smiling now. That's actually good news. The others dive into conversations but I'm very comfortable buried nose deep in my phone. It isn't until my alarm goes that I remember there are humans here with me. “What's the alarm for?," it's Charis that's asking. “We have a class now. Mr. Dreiser's class. I don't want to be late." Aubrey grabs her bag. “Oh my god yes, how could I have forgotten? Let's go together then. Timothy? Get up let's go." She's able to pull 1 able bodied guy, and me all the way to our lecture hall. As we're passing, I turn my head and see Archie and Ander. Archie turns to me first, then Ander. I'm flustered to I turn back. Grateful I did because I almost bumped into a pillar. We run inside the class just before the evil wizard comes inside and locks his doors.Rustling of the sheets wakes me up. I turn my hungover head to Vicky. We lock gazes but he averts his eyes almost immediately. "Hi." I move closer to him but he's already off the bed. "No morning cuddles I'm guessing.""I have an early morning class Ander. Important things to do." I let him get ready as I stare at the ceiling. I can't remember the last time I drank that much. Probably during Angie's death. My memory is inconsistent because last thing I remember was getting a vodka. I do remember having a fit and also being in the bathroom with Vicky. But they're all a blur. The notification ping of his phone breaks my daydreaming. It happens the first time, second, third and till it's so consistent I want to break the device. I roll to his side of the bed to silence it but realize it's not Vicky's phone but mine. What's crazy is not even the notifications but the device is fully charged. I sure as hell didn't plug it. But why would Vicky? I pick the phone to see what the fuss is al
From the number of times I've been admitted into the hospital, you'd think I'd be used to waking up and inhaling the first sting of antiseptic. It gets me every time and now isn't an exception. My head hurts like a bitch and when I try to raise my feet, they feel like I was run over by a truck. I turn my head slightly to the right and I can see someone. It takes my vision a while to clear before the white blob turns out to be a nurse. "Oh, lovely. You're awake," her chirping voice drills into my eardrums. I would've told her off if I didn't feel like shit. I manage a smile though it's nothing close to the massive one on her face. "How the hell did I end up here?"Just then, two old people I have never seen in my life walk in, smiling at me. What is with everyone and smiling? The nurse sees the confusion on my face and speaks,"This is Janet and her husband Ezra. They're the ones that brought you here."The last thing I remembered was fighting with Ander and taking a blow to the hea
"Mommy." I'm panting like a dog. My vision is blurry, and my legs wobbly, but I can hear the faintest noise. It's not my mother like I had thought. That strangled cry is mine. Why am I crying and why am I hearing myself from the distance?There's fog covering the ground I'm attempting to walk on, so I don't even know where I'm going. It feels like I'm looking for my mother, but I don't know why. "Ander," comes a breathless cry. The voice is somewhere in front of me so I pick up my pace. The faster I run the louder the voice, till I see where it's coming from. I take a quick halt as I stare at what is before —beneath me. My mother's coffin is open, both her arms at either side of the box. She's still bleeding from the cut on her wrist, only this time her blood reeks. "Ander," she says again turning her head to me. "Come to mommy." I know it's not real because my mother looks exactly like she did on her funeral. I shake my head and attempt to run away, but something pushes me right
The semester is back in full force, and so are the classes. Moving to a higher year should make me feel more excited than I feel now. I made sure Ander was completely asleep before coming to school to start my administrative processes. Ander and I have this weird rhythm of blowjobs, fingering and intense orgasms that make him breathless. And all of them have him at my mercy. There was once I rimmed him and kept edging till he burst out in tears. I was so startled, I let him cum immediately. And he did and pulsed so violently, I worried if it was a seizure. It's crazy, but it works for us. I'm searching on exciting recipes to try for dinner this evening that I don't realize someone is in my way until I bump into them. The scent hits me first and I tense. "Archer?"He barely smiles at me. I adjust my clothes, though there's nothing to adjust and try walking past him. He covers the door with his damn body so I can't press the code and run the fuck inside. Away from this murderer. "I
My graduation has to be one of the worst days of my life. Evana and her parents said they'd come a little later because of a family emergency, so I was basically alone in this fucking campus like a complete loser. While others took pictures with friends and families, I was itching for the packet of cigarettes in my pocket. My father, as promised sent me my graduation gift —another car and a ring to propose. He'd talked about proposing to her to keep her down with me and I nodded like I didn't feel vomit recoiling in my throat. A few of the guys I played basketball with come up to me with forced smiles plastered on their faces. I guess news spread fast that I was getting my father's company and now everybody wants to be on my good side. I try my very best to muster a pleasant expression as I look at them. "Hey Arch. Congratulations on graduating," Mike says and I stare at him for two reasons. First, who the fuck is Arch? And second, why congratulate me when you are graduating too?
Ander has been asleep for so long, I'm starting to wonder if he's dead. I'm staring at his almost lifeless and nude body. He stirs in the bed, letting me know he's awake but I don't care. My eyes are still planted on him. I stare at his scars, the most prominent one on the side of his body. It's ugly and I know it hurt. I wonder if we were together when he got it. Like a trance, I move closer to it. I know Ander feels me invading his space, but I don't care. I need to touch it. And I do. He hisses but I don't withdraw my hand. If I caused him pain, he deserves it. But he also deserves love and care and things I can no longer offer. My hand runs along his back, tracing every scar I can feel. Some I remember, others are new. "Vicky," Ander barely whispers. His voice coated with something I forgot existed to us. Lust. Pure, raw lust from running my hands down his back. I turn away from his gaze and shake my head, not taking my hands off him. "We're not like that anymore. We can't—"







